Learn to communicate with discussion more than with angry emotional confrontation when you disagree. Learn caring communication which means listening carefully to what the other is saying and supporting their right to disagree with you on rather trivial matters. When discussing rather important things remember that it may take more than one discussion to reach an agreement or a consensus on what the best thing to do is.
Boredom can reduce mutual attraction and sharing exciting activities together can maintain or even increase mutual bonding attraction. Plan some exciting mutually satisfying activities together throughout the marriage and you will increase your chances of remaining attractive to one another.
One way of avoiding arguments is withdrawl or ignoring the assault on you which may come in the form of severe criticism or a confrontational argument. When one partner has given up on discussing or irrationally arguing about problems then mutual attraction begins to fade and the marriage will be threatened. There is no constructive arguing possible if there is illogical ranting, name calling, profanities, and put downs as well as emotional dissatisfaction being expressed.
Few marriages will last if pessimistic depression exists frequently in one spouse. Mental health is very important in a marriage and if one is mentally handicapped and therapy does not help, then the marriage will probably not last long.
Too much caring or too much nurturing and protection or support of your spouse will lead to an overly dependent spouse who will not be able to function independently on her or his own. Quality caring and not quantity caring is what is preferable in a marriage. Quality caring means caring about the important things in the marriage and not caring so much about the rather trivial experiences, conflicting personally biased opinions, and problems which you are having.
Religious holiday traditions, especially for women, tend to increase the attractiveness of the relationship. What really strengthens a satisfying relationship is having a common or shared morality more than anything else and a recommended shared secular morality is- except in emergency situations- don’t destroy biodiversity, don’t lie, don’t be inefficient, don’t steal, don’t commit adultery if married, and don’t murder.
Sharing and celebrating each other’s successes also strengthens the marital bond. In a similar fashion it also strengthens a friendship bond if you celebrate each other’s successes. Intense optimistic shared emotions strengthen human bonds.
It may not be so obvious but sharing mutual bad feelings and emotions such as hatred, disapproval, grieving, or empathizing with a bad experience can also strengthen the human bond between two or more humans. Any shared or agreed to mutually intense emotional behavior strengthens human bonds whether the behavior is bad or good. Shared intense bad and immoral emotional behavior strengthens the human bond between delinquents and criminals. Criminal successes increase the human bonding between the participants.
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