Daily Archives: November 25, 2014

THE TRUTH ABOUT SCOLDING***

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Scold: v. to communicate punishment for a bad and/or wrong behavior(s) frequently with anger and/or being judgmental and sometimes with threats of punishment

Many parents frequently scold offspring. They have made a usually impulsive judgment that the offspring have done something bad and/or wrong and express their disapproval in a rather angry punishing tone of voice.

Sometimes the scolding is accompanied with threats of punishment to create a little fear so that the behavior is not repeated again another time. For very young offspring threatened punishment may be a spanking for very serious offenses such as fighting, stealing, and lying if isolation techniques don’t work but for older ones threatening to withdraw a privilege is a perfectly acceptable threat.

Unfortunately this scolding behavior is sometimes used on adults and teenagers with undesirable consequences because many adults and teenagers don’t want to be treated like a child and criticized in an angry tone of voice which frequently leads to arguments and defensive actions for such unjust treatment.

If you are smart then you will limit your scolding to young offspring once in a while when they really deserve a punishing angry tone of voice for doing something really very bad and/or wrong.

Judgmental anger expressed verbally is not only highly aggressive bordering on violence but it is a form of punishment which adults and teenagers frequently rebel against. If you add to your anger and threaten an adult with punishment then it will only make the reaction more rebellious and angry. Don’t scold adults and teenagers but try to frequently discuss disagreements and problems without an angry tone of voice.

 

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