Tag Archives: children

UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 1464!!!

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UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 1377!!!

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4600 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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18 QUESTIONS YOU SHOULD ASK BEFORE MARRIAGE!!!

The two most important priorities in marriage are finances and offspring. It is very smart to make sure that you are on the same page on these two topics and have similar views on spending money or perhaps even saving some. Six questions you should ask are-

How much money should we both be making before having children?

Will we have enough money saved to take care of childcare when we have a newborn or will just one of us be working for a while?

About how many offspring would you like to raise or support?

If we won $10,000 how would you spend it?

How long do you think you will be working at your current job before you either get promoted or move on to a better job elsewhere?

What kind of work do you think you will be doing ten years from now?

 

4 important questions to ask relate to fidelity and promiscuity which is a very important subject to discuss because next to finances adultery is the second major cause for divorce in what is turning out to be a relatively hedonous western society with an overemphasis on sex and the pursuit of pleasure.

Beware, because old bad habits are hard to break or eliminate and if your future spouse has a history of great promiscuity then the chances are great that promiscuity will continue in the future too after marriage. Another important area to probe is a possible addiction to pornography and possible kinky sexual turn-ons which should be discussed prior to marriage to see whether they may handicap a consensual sexual relationship.

Are you monogamous?

What do you consider cheating in marriage?

About how many women or men have you slept with before you met me?

What turns you on sexually?

 

Housework can be a source for many arguments and you should determine whose responsibility it will be beforehand or whether you will be sharing the load and be assigned tasks to do such as cleaning, doing laundry, meal preparation, doing the dishes, taking out the garbage, yardwork, gardening, etc. Hopefully you won’t get into an argument about this is women’s work or this is man’s work because routine work is work no matter who does it.

Who will be responsible for the housework or will we be sharing it and how?

 

In-laws can be a major source for marital disagreement especially if some of them want to get involved in your marriage. Even worse is if they decide that they want to run it for you and are always critical of one spouse and take sides in marital disagreements. It is important to get a ball park idea on how important parents and in-laws will be in a marriage, especially if they are overly critical, combative, and don’t get along well with either spouse.

How involved will we get in supporting your parents in retirement years?

What role will your family play in our marriage?

What will you do if I get into a fight with your family?

 

What is also important is finding out how much of an introvert or extrovert your potential spouse is. You may find a very reclusive spouse unsettling and may start complaining about being ignored. On the other hand an extreme extrovert may spend too much time with other humans and once again you may begin to feel ignored. In either case, try to find out if you are going to have to deal with an extreme introvert or an extreme extrovert which may be disruptive to marital life.

How much space or time for yourself do you need?

What things do you enjoy doing by yourself?

 

Many of us just live from day to day without consciously planning or thinking about the future in any significant way. Some of us do have long duration goals so it is important to know how marriage will affect those goals.

What is your goal or purpose in life and how do you envision a partner fitting into it?

 

Finally, compatibility is often a function of similar likes and loves so it is important to find out in some detail what your potential spouse loves, hates, likes, and dislikes. If you find out that your morality is different or that you have radically different views on raising offspring then this can become a major source of arguments, disagreements, and unnecessary turmoil.

What do you love and hate the most and what do you like and dislike?

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4400 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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HOW TO DISCIPLINE KIDS!!!

Crying boy being disciplined or punished.

One of the most effective ways of letting kids learn about the wrong things to do is to let them suffer the consequences.

Buy a relatively fragile toy and warn them sternly that it is fragile and it will break if thrown around or dropped from a high height. Then let the child play with the fragile toy until they wind up breaking it. Then tell them that because they were not careful enough the toy broke and tell them that it will be a long time before they will be trusted with another fragile toy again.

Obviously if the child is too young to be trusted with toxic household chemicals, dangerous medicines, or sharp objects like knives and sharp forks then these objects should be locked away in a secure place inaccessible to the child. You would not want them to suffer the bad consequences of being poisoned, cutting themselves severely with a sharp knife, or poking out an eye with a sharp fork.

The swimming pool is very dangerous for very small children and it should be fenced off until the child is taught to tread water or minimally stay afloat.

When crossing a street it is wise to hold the hand of a child and teach them to look both ways before crossing the street. If the child is not old enough to follow you across the street without running out into it then you must continue to hold the child’s hand until the child follows you obediently across the street on their own.

 

Logical consequences can also be taught with consistency.

If a child begins to throw a toy around which is not meant to be thrown then it can be removed and placed on a shelf for the rest of the day. A toy which is meant to be shared can similarly be removed for a day if sharing does not occur. If the children are old enough to tell time then you can request that each child share a toy for 10 minutes at a time. Once again, if the toy is not appropriately shared then it can be removed for the day. Sometimes a toy can be shared on a daily basis and one child may have it on Monday and the other can have it to play with on a Tuesday, etc.

Before bedtime it is a good time to put toys away. If the child does not put the toys away then you can threaten to put the toys in a box and not make them available for the next day of playing. If the child still refuses to put the toys away then follow through with the threat and box up the toys and remove them to a safe place out of reach for the next day.

Bathing, brushing teeth, and putting dirty clothes into a laundry hamper is a good routine to get into before bedtime. Once again a threat to remove a favorite toy for a day or a few days may be used to get compliance. Not highly recommended but possible is to force a child to put dirty clothes in a hamper by physically making them go through the motions by grabbing the child’s hand and moving his or her body from clothes to hamper until all the dirty clothes have been dropped in.

If a child does not finish dinner then that is just fine but warn them that they will be given no food or snacks until the next meal time. Children these days are overfed and missing one or two meals is not a tragic or unacceptable circumstance. Our ancestors sometimes went days without eating and even fasted at certain times and frankly only ate when hungry.

Another technique used by parents to stuff their kids is to say that you will only get desert if you finish your meal. Frankly, desert should be maybe a once in a week event since overconsumption of sweets is a major cause of diabetes and other eating problems. Supermarkets are overflowing with sugar added to lousy over processed foods of all kinds and is a major reason why many humans no longer eat healthy well balanced organic food meals.

For children fighting scolding in a loud voice can help and if that fails separating them physically and carrying one off to sit in a chair in a corner by themselves for an hour or so is usually effective. If a child throws a tantrum in a public place then physically removing them from that location and getting them to quiet or cool down in the car or outside the public location usually works if reinforced with the words-are you now ready to go back and behave?

 

Withholding a child’s privileges works well for all ages.

Withholding a cherished toy, not letting a child play outdoors for a day, or not letting him or her play with a playmate are privileges which can be withheld for bad behavior or as a form of discipline. For older children taking away a cellphone or computer for a day or week and grounding them for a given time are ways to get compliance with household rules and good behavior.

Spanking is usually not recommended but there may be certain children who are becoming compulsive liars or stealers and adults can be severely punished for these behaviors. Explain first to the children that lying and stealing destroys the trust between humans and they can no longer be good friends or no one will believe them anymore and that adults are punished for stealing with fines and jail. The threat of spanking should first be done for serious lying or stealing and then a consistent follow through with the spanking punishment if the intentional lying or stealing occurs again.

 

Discuss the logical consequences or reasons why bad behavior should not be tolerated.

Parents are usually not very good at this.

Reasons against fighting can be physical pain or harm on another, causing aggressive emotions and actions in another or probable bad retaliation, parents don’t physically fight with one another because they love one another and want to live together peacefully, and finally adult fighting is called physical abuse or battery and aggression punishable by jail time.

Reasons against yelling indoors is that it disturbs or annoys others who may not be able to concentrate on what they are doing, it is usually done in emergencies such as an accident, and it is usually done outdoors to cover a larger communication distance and to signal danger such as a speeding car or bicycle, etc.

Reasons for being polite, kind, considerate, empathetic, and friendly is that most humans will like you more and may even become a friend.

 

Non negotiable arguments for younger children.

There are just times when something isn’t fair in the child’s mind or when the child asserts his or her stubborn self and refuses to do something no matter how reasonable it may be. These are time when the parent has to say “yes, it isn’t fair” or “I know” and proceeds to enforce the rules saying Me and Mom are in charge of the family and rule enforcement and we are the final authority in making decisions for the children in the family. When you have children of your own then you can be the boss over them when they are young.

 

Finally the most important thing is to be a good role model for your children since most children ultimately behave like their parents later in life and act the same way towards their own children also. If you want your children to not smoke, not drink, not do drugs, not curse, not gamble, not fight, not frequently argue and if you want them to be polite, kind, courteous, empathetic, friendly, and loving then be that way yourself and interact appropriately with your spouse and other humans.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

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WANT SUCCESSFUL OFFSPRING? DO THESE 9 THINGS!!!

Don’t tell them they can be anything that they want but steer them into good paying professions.

Eating dinner as a family has social and verbal benefits.

Enforce or limit screen time on tablets and cellphones to about an hour for young children and have them engage with the real world of books, playing, etc.

When mothers work outside the home then daughters tend to also hold more responsible jobs when they grow up.

Offspring with greater success tended to do chores as a child.

Offspring who learn delayed gratification or do unpleasant things at home without being instantly rewarded tended to perform better in careers.

Reading to young children and teaching them to read as soon as possible is an aid in better performance in school and elsewhere.

Let them fail and learn from their mistakes on their own builds character.

Let them travel to other locations and to foreign countries if possible since this stimulates a desire to try new things and appreciate different points of view.

 

What this list does not include is the fundamental fact that if the parents are trustworthy or have integrity, dependability, competence, and good communication skills then their offspring also tend to follow in their footsteps personality wise.

If you want to read the original article in inc.com then click on this link:

Science Says the Most Successful Kids Have Parents Who Do These 9 Things

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

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QUOTE BY TODD TIAHRT!!!

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If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4100 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

https://uldissprogis.com/zlist-of-my-most-popular-blogs/

UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 914!!!

fotorcreated

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 3900 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

https://uldissprogis.com/zlist-of-my-most-popular-blogs/