Ideally you have great role model moral parents, have been raised with one or more siblings, have role model moral relatives, and have had good role model friends in your formative years. If this is the case then you probably also have a good personality which needs little improvement.
On the other hand if you haven’t had good moral role model parents, are an only child, have had bad role model relatives, and have had bad role model friends in your formative years then your personality is probably pretty bad and needs a radical change. Fortunately relatively few of us fall into these two extremes of good moral role models and bad somewhat immoral role models.
If you want to radically improve your very bad personality then it is mostly a lost cause if you are already an adult so my recommendations for improving a personality apply to humans who are flawed but not extremely flawed personality types.
Why is being moral or ethically sound so important? It is because trust is the bond which attracts and keeps relationships going and without trust relationships fall apart sooner or later. To establish trust you must have integrity which basically means being honest and moral. Being moral or ethical is not lying, not stealing, not committing adultery if married, and not murdering. My morality also includes not destroying biodiversity and not being inefficient but these two important subjects are covered in my book SECULAR MORAL CODE on Amazon. So one of the most important factors in a good personality is being TRUSTWORTHY which is the foundation of almost all good relationships and personality types.
There are other factors which make for a trustworthy relationship. You must also be as dependable as possible and try to fulfill all your promises. Competence in what you do also builds trust because you can’t depend on an incompetent human who makes too many mistakes, forgets too often, or is pretentious about his or her actual abilities. Bad gossiping, spreading false rumors about someone, or lying about a human also destroys trust and back stabbing is even worse.
So if you are on the road to improving your personality then trying to become more trustworthy is priority number one on your list of things to do. If you are trustworthy then you will have a good reputation and may even be admired though some of your opinions and beliefs may be different from those with which you are communicating with or involved in relationships with.
Another very important personality trait is an honest or sincere interest in other humans, especially in those that you choose to interact with and form relationships with. A genuine interest in another human is conveyed by listening carefully to what is said, asking appropriate questions and following up on what is being said, interrupting only when the conversation gets boring or seems to be going nowhere, showing empathy with present and past circumstances, offering helpful advice where appropriate, motivating one to continue doing something good, praising one for doing something worthwhile, sharing similar experiences or interests verbally and sometimes physically, being sincere in your criticisms if any so they don’t come across harsh or rude, interjecting humor where appropriate, and maintaining an optimistic and enthusiastic mood or atmosphere or smiling, nodding, and gesturing appropriately.
Yes, it is hard showing genuine interest in a human that is not very interesting to begin with but there is social etiquette to deal with these humans in a polite and respectful way. If you want details then read my book GOOD MODERN BEHAVIORS on Amazon.
You can be an introvert and be respected and admired by relatively few individuals or you can be an extrovert and be respected and admired by relatively many individuals. Neither being an introverted type of personality or an extroverted type of personality is good or bad. Both are good if you are trustworthy or have integrity and are basically a moral human. This is not an article designed to help you to become more extroverted or introverted since introverts generally try to avoid excessive human drama and limit human interactions and extroverts often like human drama and interactions with many humans.
Ultimately an extroverted human personality can interact with a wide variety of human personality types successfully and it is something which is called emotional intelligence. It is a learned skill and is usually acquired with a lot of experience with all kinds of humans. Many introverts may lack this emotional intelligence with a wide range of human personality types but they may have great emotional intelligence with relatively few carefully chosen individuals. I suppose you could call introvert emotional intelligence quality emotional intelligence and extroverted emotional intelligence quantity emotional intelligence. This quality versus quantity statement is just a spontaneous thought which I had and need not be taken that seriously if you are confused by it.
Happiness is contagious and if you are a happy individual then this will attract other humans. In most cases the happiest humans are those who enjoy setting and pursuing short and long duration goals and try to achieve them. They are usually the doers and not just the dreamers. The happiest are those who set realistic short and long duration goals and develop confidence and a can do attitude with successful achievement along the way.
There are the super ambitious happy entrepreneurs but you can also be considered ambitious and happy if you want to maintain or improve your health by eating organic, sleeping enough, exercising on a regular basis, self educating yourself by reading useful information which improves your knowledge and skills, and trying to prepare for a better paying or more fulfilling job and more interesting life.
Being happy is a state of mind which you are responsible for to a large extent. If you want to improve your personality then research core values or personality traits and self educate yourself about them. Find out yourself details about things such as compassion, caring, selfishness, friendship, kindness, optimism, responsibility, creativity, curiosity, sharing, etc. or read details about these concepts in my book SECULAR MORAL CODE. Yes, you can also search my encyclopedic blog at uldissprogis.com using those keywords and you shouldn’t come away disappointed.
Finally, once you determine what part of your personality you want to improve you can research it further and start taking steps trying to improve it. Best wishes. Uldis
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