Tag Archives: marriage

UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 1416!!!

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4700 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 1342!!!

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4600 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

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UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 1328!!!

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4600 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

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18 QUESTIONS YOU SHOULD ASK BEFORE MARRIAGE!!!

The two most important priorities in marriage are finances and offspring. It is very smart to make sure that you are on the same page on these two topics and have similar views on spending money or perhaps even saving some. Six questions you should ask are-

How much money should we both be making before having children?

Will we have enough money saved to take care of childcare when we have a newborn or will just one of us be working for a while?

About how many offspring would you like to raise or support?

If we won $10,000 how would you spend it?

How long do you think you will be working at your current job before you either get promoted or move on to a better job elsewhere?

What kind of work do you think you will be doing ten years from now?

 

4 important questions to ask relate to fidelity and promiscuity which is a very important subject to discuss because next to finances adultery is the second major cause for divorce in what is turning out to be a relatively hedonous western society with an overemphasis on sex and the pursuit of pleasure.

Beware, because old bad habits are hard to break or eliminate and if your future spouse has a history of great promiscuity then the chances are great that promiscuity will continue in the future too after marriage. Another important area to probe is a possible addiction to pornography and possible kinky sexual turn-ons which should be discussed prior to marriage to see whether they may handicap a consensual sexual relationship.

Are you monogamous?

What do you consider cheating in marriage?

About how many women or men have you slept with before you met me?

What turns you on sexually?

 

Housework can be a source for many arguments and you should determine whose responsibility it will be beforehand or whether you will be sharing the load and be assigned tasks to do such as cleaning, doing laundry, meal preparation, doing the dishes, taking out the garbage, yardwork, gardening, etc. Hopefully you won’t get into an argument about this is women’s work or this is man’s work because routine work is work no matter who does it.

Who will be responsible for the housework or will we be sharing it and how?

 

In-laws can be a major source for marital disagreement especially if some of them want to get involved in your marriage. Even worse is if they decide that they want to run it for you and are always critical of one spouse and take sides in marital disagreements. It is important to get a ball park idea on how important parents and in-laws will be in a marriage, especially if they are overly critical, combative, and don’t get along well with either spouse.

How involved will we get in supporting your parents in retirement years?

What role will your family play in our marriage?

What will you do if I get into a fight with your family?

 

What is also important is finding out how much of an introvert or extrovert your potential spouse is. You may find a very reclusive spouse unsettling and may start complaining about being ignored. On the other hand an extreme extrovert may spend too much time with other humans and once again you may begin to feel ignored. In either case, try to find out if you are going to have to deal with an extreme introvert or an extreme extrovert which may be disruptive to marital life.

How much space or time for yourself do you need?

What things do you enjoy doing by yourself?

 

Many of us just live from day to day without consciously planning or thinking about the future in any significant way. Some of us do have long duration goals so it is important to know how marriage will affect those goals.

What is your goal or purpose in life and how do you envision a partner fitting into it?

 

Finally, compatibility is often a function of similar likes and loves so it is important to find out in some detail what your potential spouse loves, hates, likes, and dislikes. If you find out that your morality is different or that you have radically different views on raising offspring then this can become a major source of arguments, disagreements, and unnecessary turmoil.

What do you love and hate the most and what do you like and dislike?

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4400 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

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WAYS YOU CAN DIFFER WITH YOUR FUTURE SPOUSE!!!

Before marriage it is always important to make sure that your views on morality are the same or that you trust each other, don’t lie, and believe in a monogamous relationship during marriage. Other things which are very important are your spending habits and whether you want to raise children. Agreeing on these major points is necessary for a good compatible marriage but there are other areas where commonality is not so important and may even be an antidote for a boring marital life. If you differ in these 8 general areas then it is no great reason for being overly concerned and it can result in a rather interesting marriage and not a dull one.

Different hobbies and interests are acceptable and with time and the sharing of experiences you may even become more interested in those differing hobbies and interests yourself. I had a scientific background and a great interest in technology, tools, and science and my wife was an artist interested in crafts, knitting, sewing, and dress making which I considered at first to basically be a waste of time, not a money maker, and basically boring trivia.

Over the years I made aesthetic evaluations based primarily upon how close to reality and nature the artistic items were. I was surprised that with time my tastes and spouse’s tastes became more alike and I developed a good sense of color, texture, etc. and became much better at evaluating artistic expressions and was surprised how often she asked me for advice, I gladly offered it, and we often agreed.

Different political beliefs are possible because one spouse will basically think that government should get involved in helping out humans in need and the other spouse may basically feel that humans should behave more responsibly and government help should only be used as a last resort. Let’s face it, establishment Republicans and Democrats basically believe in growing government and passing laws often favoring the rich and special interests even though they may claim publically that they are representing and addressing the needs of minorities, the poor, and middle class.

Sexual turn-ons may slightly differ in spouses and some may seem rather unusual and kinky. With time and having sex the same basic way very often you may eventually try doing some of that kinky stuff as a change of pace and find out that it is not that bad after all and perhaps perfectly acceptable. After all, pleasing one another sexually can be important even though some of the desired variations may take a little effort and perhaps unpleasant sacrifice to fulfill.

It is not unusual for taste in movies, music, and TV to be different with women often liking love stories, family films, and romance a lot while men often prefer action films and sports related subject matter.

Different cultural, religious, and ethnic backgrounds can sometimes challenge a relationship if there is no common morality but often these differences can be accepted and even appreciated with the passage of time. Most conflicts which will arise can be ironed out if dogmatic relatives do not get too involved and start interfering in the marriage and trying to run it in one direction only or a direction which is opposed to the beliefs and practices of one spouse exclusively.

Of course if you are a dogmatic Muslim, Jehovah Witness, or Orthodox Jew then a different religion for a spouse will not work. Most religions are relatively flexible with liberal and conservative wings and a shared basic morality which is don’t lie, don’t steal, and don’t commit adultery if married.

Introvert and extrovert spouses can often make a go of it where the introverted spouse leaves most of the socializing to the other spouse and focuses mainly on family responsibilities and not social ones. I am an introvert without a close friend and let my wife take care of social connections. It has worked well this way for over 25 years. I am much more selective in the humans that I associate with than my wife who maintains minimal contact with about a hundred humans who have crossed her life but even here she only has a handful of a few good friends and her sister whom she stays in frequent contact with.

Cleanliness and orderliness can be an abnormal obsession with some humans who may incessantly nag if something is not clean or orderly. If the house isn’t cleaned on a regular basis, the dishes are not always washed, the laundry is not always done, etc. you can still lead a relatively clean and orderly life as long as you are not nagged about it on a regular basis.

A sense of adventure and desire to travel may differ in spouses and is usually a costly enterprise since traveling to distant places and meeting different humans is often time consuming and expensive. If you don’t like adventure then you can let your spouse do the adventuresome stuff alone or with other like minded humans.

As long as you are not going into debt financing the travel and adventure, it is not something which will ruin a marriage.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4400 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

https://uldissprogis.com/zlist-of-my-most-popular-blogs/

UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 1066!!!

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If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4100 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

https://uldissprogis.com/zlist-of-my-most-popular-blogs/

UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 982!!!

fotorcreated

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4000 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

https://uldissprogis.com/zlist-of-my-most-popular-blogs/