Tag Archives: punishment

UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 1538!!!

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BRIEF REVIEW OF GOOD AND BAD PUNISHMENT!!!

As parents we often are uncertain whether a punishment is working or is effective or we are uncertain whether a threat of punishment or threat of withdrawal of a privilege will work. Ways of punishing are many and you should refer to books for detailed information on the subject. I highlight general reasons why punishments can be effective and why they sometimes are not.

My young son threw a loud temper tantrum in the supermarket when the family went shopping and I immediately physically carried him out to the car and had him calm down. When he did calm down I asked him whether he was ready to go back in and behave. We went back shopping and everything was fine again.

This is just one example of immediate effective punishment for young offspring which is nonviolent and does not involve loudly shouting “no!” or “stop that!” in a public place.

 

 

PUNISHMENTS ARE MOST EFFECTIVE WHEN THEY ARE-

Appropriate and thoughtful:

Consistently enforced:

Enforced immediately following the behavior:

Helpful in teaching what to do:

Not sources of additional wanted attention:

 

Appropriate and thoughtful:

This should mean that the punishment

is adjusted to the severity of the misbehavior timewise and/or

is (emotionally impactful and/or harsh) to the right degree and/or

is a consideration of the effectiveness of previous similar incidents and/or

is the right time, place, or circumstance to be enforced

Appropriate: v. to add and/or to subtract a subset(s) necessary for a different subset(s) and being normative and acceptable for the circumstances

 

Thoughtful or Thinkad: adj. silently and mentally verbalizing and trying to make correspondences between the subsets of one’s own knowledge and/or experiences and using as much logic as possible

Harsh: adj. unpleasantly intense and/or shocking to the senses

 

Another general statement which can be made is that the punishment fits the crime and/or misbehavior.

This means that the length of time the punishment lasts can be short, medium, or long depending on the circumstances.

The emotional intensity felt by the offendor can be extreme, medium, or low intensity hatred and/or mental pain or anguish and/or unpleasantness.

You should consider whether the punishment should be changed if previous attempts a dealing with the misbehavior have not been effective and the misbehavior continues to recur.

The kind of punishment can be

forceful,

withdrawing a privilege,

demanding a repetition of corrected behavior more than once,

demanding completion of an unpleasant task,

a threat of future punishment, or

a loud threatening order to cease misbehaving.

 

Consistently enforced:

Consistently: adv. repeating at different starting points in time

 

Repeat: v. to do an event(s) more than once with or without duration(s) in between

 

If the punishment is not severe enough then we may be consistently punishing the same way but the punishment itself is ineffectual. If this is the case then the punishment must become more severe since consistency is not enough to guarantee successful obedience. More severe punishment means that it is made to last longer, is more repugnant or devastating to the offendor, and is a privilege removed which is more highly valued such as the removal of cellphone usage.

As a parent you may not be present every time the misbehavior happens so poor supervision may be the real reason why a misbehavior continues to exist because the misbehavior is done frequently when we are not looking or supervising. We may think that we are being consistent when in fact our assumed consistent punishment really seems and is ineffectual because it is really inconsistent.

 

Enforced immediately following the behavior:

Immediate punishment which can merely be a loud “no!” is desirable for very young offspring. Delayed punishment is bad for very young offspring because they are much more impulsive in their behavior and must immediately be disciplined for maximum impact or effectiveness. With older offspring some delays are inevitable because it may be the wrong time, place, or circumstance and the punishment will have to start at a later or delayed time.

 

Helpful in teaching what to do:

Teaching the right behavior by an example to be imitated is one approach to constructive punishment. Giving a reason why it is appropriate behavior beyond saying it is just the correct behavior is another approach to constructive punishment.

Reasoning, you can say that yelling or shouting is not right in this circumstance because it annoys, disturbs, or shocks other humans or it steals their right to a peaceful, calm environment without unnecessary stress. It steals their right to a secure and predictable environment free of potential danger or threats of danger since shouting sometimes causes fear reactions. It is not the right time, place, or circumstance to be loud or yelling.

 

Not sources of additional wanted attention:

Some offspring are starved for affection of some kind which is rarely given and prefer punishment to no attention at all. Others just like to be noticed or be the center of attention. For these among other reasons offspring may misbehave to attract the attention of other siblings, parents, peers, and hopefully not law enforcement officers.

Daring one to misbehave is sometimes viewed as a brave or courageous act of rebellion against behavioral norms and is valued by gangs, cults, and deviant individuals. Of course a dare can also be a means to get another human into trouble with authority figures so it can be a plan to harm or injure someone intentionally.

Dare: v. to courageously do a subset(s) without permission and/or a legal right

 

PUNISHMENT DOES NOT WORK WHEN IT IS:

Mindless or inappropriate:

Sources of anxiety, pain, rage, or fear:

Inconsistently enforced:

Delayed:

Dependent on the presence of the enforcer:

Unclear or do not teach a lesson:

Sources of additional attention:

 

Mindless or inappropriate:

This is when the punishment

is not adjusted to the severity of the misbehavior timewise and/or

is (emotionally impactful and/or harsh) to the wrong degree and/or

has no consideration of the effectiveness of previous similar incidents and/or

is the wrong time, place, or circumstance to be enforced.

 

Sources of anxiety, pain, rage, or fear:

This is highly inaccurate since a fear of punishment to some degree is necessary for a punishment to be effective especially when a threat of punishment is communicated. If there is no fear of punishment then the badness or wrongness of the misbehavior does not register mentally to the degree necessary to effectively stop future similar misbehaviors.

Physical pain is only rarely necessary to effectively stop immorality or repetitive lying or stealing in very young offspring. If the child rages or has a temper tantrum then it is a specific individual reaction to a stimulus or circumstance and rarely the fault of the parent.

Rage: n. very intense anger which frequently includes a violent behavior(s)

 

If your offspring rages every time that you punish then there is something emotionally unstable or wrong with them. If your offspring fear your punishment then you are probably using abusive punishment tactics or maybe hitting them too hard or too often.

 

Inconsistently enforced:

Inconsistency can mean not punishing a misbehavior every time it exists or not being the same punishment in degree or kind.

As a parent you may not be present every time the misbehavior happens so poor supervision may be the real reason why a misbehavior continues to exist because the misbehavior is done when we are not looking or supervising. We may think that we are being consistent when in fact our assumed consistent punishment really seems and is ineffectual because it is in reality inconsistent.

Wild swings in the severity of the punishment for a given misbehavior or an unpredictable kind of punishment each time a misbehavior exists could be considered to be inconsistent punishment and can sometimes create confusion, uncertainty, misunderstanding, or irrational fear in the offendor.

 

Delayed:

Delayed punishment is bad for very young offspring but with older offspring some delays are inevitable because it may be the wrong time, place, or circumstance and the punishment will have to start at a later or delayed time.

 

Dependent on the presence of the enforcer:

It is a sad fact of life and human nature that the temptation to misbehave increases when not in the presence of an authority figure who can enforce the rules. This is why it is so important to teach moral behavior and cultural norms to young impressionable offspring so that they learn to impulsively behave the right way when they are away from an authority figure.

Neglected, undisciplined, misbehaving offspring are increasing in numbers because of bad supervision in their early formative years by parents. Teenage neglect by working parents is added to deviant peer pressure to misbehave and both are reasons for the increasing immaturity and irresponsibility of the younger generations when they become adults.

 

Unclear or do not teach a lesson:

Don’t teach what is the right thing to do is really all that this should mean. Unfortunately most parents do not often give rational explanations for why behaving is the right thing to do and misbehaving is the wrong thing to do.

Do it because I say so or because I am the rule enforcer and must be respected is good enough reason for very young impressionable offspring but the older they get the more important it becomes to start giving them rational or reasonable answers when they ask -Why should I do it your way? or Why is something which I am doing bad?

 

Sources of additional attention:

Bad behavior does attract attention as proved by some popular celebrities. They  would rather be talked about doing something bad or deviant then not talked about at all or ignored. Neglected offspring sometimes misbehave to attract parental attention, disapproval, and punishment which is apparently better than being totally ignored or neglected.

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UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 835!!!

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If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 3800 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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LYING: AN IMMORAL SOCIAL SCOURGE!!!

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Trust is the human bond which makes successful close marital and friendship relationships possible. Without trust a good or great relationship is not possible and if one exists then it is highly dysfunctional filled with misery and trauma. Lie once about a rather unimportant thing and the transgression can be forgiven without dire consequences but develop a habit of lying about little things and soon it escalates into lying about important things and disastrous relationship results follow.

That being said deception and lying is escalating in western cultures, fly by night businesses victimize many with their miraculous deceptive promises, politicians tell humans what they want to hear and when they get elected it is business as usual and all their lying promises are forgotten, and humans lie to each other and then wonder why so many hoped for potential new relationships wind up in the toilet.

There are 7 basic excuses or possible reasons for why some humans lie and none of them are justifiable in the long duration.

Young offspring sometimes try to lie to avoid PUNISHMENT for bad or wrong behavior and sometimes adults try to avoid punishing social criticism or disapproval by lying about their unacceptable behavior.

Adults sometimes lie to EXPLOIT others or gain an advantage. Charismatic con artist are often pathological liars good at making humans feel good, good at creating an illusion of high monied status, and good at manipulating the basic greed of gullible humans. Ordinary humans also sometimes try to gain social advantage by exaggerated praise and kissing up to others, especially authority figures from whom they expect future favors.

Escaping ACCOUNTABILITY is a reason some lie to escape taking blame for unfulfilled promises and blame for irresponsible behavior or stupid mistakes.

Criminals lie to try and get away with STEALING something which doesn’t belong to them and students sometimes lie about cheating or STEALING information which they don’t have memorized. Bosses or coworkers sometimes lie trying to STEAL credit for something a worker has accomplished. Some men lie to STEAL sex from women who would not voluntarily give it knowing the truth.

Some humans lie about their fictitious accomplishments trying to “steal” admiration from others or to gain a COMPETIVE ADVANTAGE in a job application.

Some sadly lie to themselves about their real worth and potential trying to make themselves FEEL GOOD while living a rather mundane existence.

Some lie to inflict mental and sometimes physical PAIN. Being called ugly, stupid, being victimized by an untrue bit of gossip, and being told to do something illegal which we are assured is legal are just a few of the cruel ways that some humans lie to us to inflict pain and often cause pleasure in the cruel offender.

CONCLUSION:

Your lying will eventually destroy your social reputation and the only way that liars can make a living at it is to become a gypsy traveling the world looking for new suckers to take your lying bait.

The internet is making it possible to scam the world and do so from one general location so deceitful lying humans are here to stay on into the foreseeable future but hopefully their numbers will decrease and not increase.

What is really needed is a universal accepted secular morality where lying of any kind is considered an immoral transgression. Without that secular morality lying will continue to create chaos and plague humanity on into the distant future.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 3300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 273!!!

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THE TRUTH ABOUT CONFINE+

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Confine: v. to not be free to move external to a boundary because of punishment and/or circumstance

You may be confined in prison or confined to live in a house due to a severe handicap. In either case there are certain physical boundaries which confine your movement and you can’t freely move beyond those boundaries.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT DETERRENCE*

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Deterrence: n. unmotivating and/or frightening an animal(s) with a subset(s) which frequently is a punishment(s) and/or source of punishment(s)

How do you deter aggression, especially from a potential enemy? Historically greater military force and the certainty of punishing retaliation was the solution.

Today with the internet the source of cyber aggression can come from your own country internally and potentially take out a vital electrical grid which paralyzes as much as a third of the nation. Businesses are more vulnerable with internet access. How do you deter such actions with the certainty of punishment when the aggressor can be anywhere in the world?

In the case of a power grid takedown human intervention is necessary at vital switching points to monitor potential criminal software attacks and prevent them from jumping automatically to all other points of the grid. Decentralization of the power grid is vital to it’s survival during a cyber attack.

For businesses connected to the internet secured information storage not accessible from the internet cloud is vital. A secure storage bank of vital information must be kept in reserve free of Trojans, malware, viruses, etc. and a totally different secure backup system should be in place which can be activated if the ongoing system is compromised.

Is this technically possible? It’s not my job to know the answer but it is clear that systems must be devised which may lose a few minutes or hours or day of information transactions but maintain the secured integrity of most of the historical information stored. This way instead of your whole system going down only a fraction of a percent of the system will be lost due to software cyber intrusion.

Offspring are deterred by the threat of punishment and/or privilege removal and most criminals are also deterred by the almost certainty of punishment for criminal activity. Some humans are not deterred by anything and will give up their lives trying to promote their goal(s) so the certainty of deterrence is never 100% in the real world.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT EXECUTION*

tibet_execution_3

Execution: n. officially killing as a punishment for a crime which discourages many but not all criminals from committing samer crime

Execution by lethal injection, by firing squad, and beheading are all punishments for committing a crime against a legal authority. Tyrants love executions because it terrorizes humans and prevents much dissent from repugnant ruling dogma.

I personally don’t believe in executions in civilized countries because being framed or set up is relatively easy with the clever placement of doctored circumstantial evidence. If you are innocent of a brutal crime frame up then you still have a lifetime in prison and your friends to try and prove your innocence. If you are innocent and get executed then there is no way to ultimately reverse the death decision in your favor at some point in the future.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT PENALTY+

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Penalty: n. punishing by law and/or authority

 

There are usually penalties for disobeying rules and there are also penalties or punishments for disobeying the law.

Sports penalties are probably the most common ones that most humans encounter and there are also parental penalties for offspring bad behavior in families.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT VENGEFULNESS+

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 Vengefulness: n. desiring to punish for a real and/or imagined (injury(s) and/or wrong(s))

 

We have all been ridiculed, name called, put down, been the victim of harsh criticism, have been rude to, been insulted, been called ugly or stupid, and have been intentionally hurt physically. The normal human response or reaction is to want to or desire to punish that human for doing us harm or wronging us. If we proceed to try and punish the offending human then that is called vengeance. Vengefulness is merely a desire to punish but not actually punishing the offender.

 

Sometimes a personally felt injury and/or wrong is just your imagination. You may not have been promoted on the job which you think you deserved. What you may not realize is that some other candidate for the job may have had superior qualifications or had developed a more friendly relationship with the boss and those are valid reasons why you were not promoted.

 

Sometimes someone ignoring you or not talking to you very frequently may be an imagined wrong since you feel that you deserve more attention. What you may not realize that communication is time consuming and that spending more time with you is just mostly a waste of time, energy, and maybe even money.

 

Being vengeful or wanting some form of revenge can make you very miserable mentally and your bitterness will hurt you more in the long duration than it will hurt the offending human.  Learn to quickly get over your vengeful feelings because they are usually mostly a waste of mental energy which doesn’t improve your life in any significant way but in fact handicaps it.

 

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THE TRUTH ABOUT VENGEANCE+

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Vengeance: n. unofficial and/or official punishing for a real and/or imagined (injury(s) and/or wrong(s))

Our ego may have been hurt or injured, we may have suffered harsh criticism, someone may have ridiculed or called us names, or someone may have done some other mental and/or physical injury or wrong to us intentionally and the first reaction of most humans is-I want vengeance or I want to punish them in some way!

Historically an eye for an eye was the principle but in modern days vengeance is officially sometimes gotten through the court system by suing and getting a judgment against the offender. A fine or jail time is usually the punishment for intentionally doing to someone a very serious injury(s) and/or wrong(s).

The eye for an eye principle also applies to lesser wrongs. We may ridicule or name calling someone back for ridiculing us or name calling us. If someone is rude to us we may be tempted to be rude back at them rather than just trying to ignore the rudeness and hope that they eventually leave our lives in peace.

The turn the other cheek principle for an injury and/or wrong which isn’t very serious is just to ignore and possibly forgive someone if the injury and/or wrong was not actually intentional. There is a big difference between being intentionally or unintentionally injured and/or wronged and knowing the difference can lead to the elimination of many vengeful feelings which can make your life very miserable for an extended time if you let the vengeful feelings fester in your mind for a long duration.

Sometimes we only imagine that we have been injured and/or wronged such as not being promoted in a job. We may want vengeance but it is realistically not obtainable unless we punish the employer by quitting our job and leaving.

Some feel that society has been unjust to them or wronged them and want vengeance for the sorry situation which they are in. This is frequently an imagined wrong which may be primarily a human’s own fault for not getting an adequate education, personal immorality,  not developing a good social personality, and not being financially responsible.

Historically vengeance has had a bad reputation as being something bad but the reality is that vengeance is an acceptable natural human reaction to the wrongs and injuries which they suffer over a lifetime of bad circumstances caused intentionally by bad humans in most cases.

Vengeful feelings can handicap your life because if you start hating things or humans whom you can’t change then the hate can last over a lifetime and make your life truly miserable without a way out. Racism against a powerful ethnic group which you feel deserves vengeance can lead to a lifetime of hateful feelings which will make you into a bitter and unsatisfied human filled with gripes about real or imagined unfairness or injustice.

 

 

 

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THE TRUTH ABOUT MITIGATION+

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Mitigation: n. decreasing the severity of a subset(s) such as a (punishment(s) and/or bad circumstance) and/or (mistake(s) and/or offense(s)) frequently with a valid excuse(s) and/or action(s)

Due to mitigating circumstances his fine was reduced by a half. There is generally a severe hardship or unpredictable chance occurrences which are used as an excuse to reduce punishment or the severity of a fine.

In the case of the courts the excessive cost and time needed to fully prosecute a criminal is used as an excuse or mitigating circumstance to permit plea bargaining to a lesser charge.

To reduce the bad effects on wetlands mitigation is used to reduce the risks of excessive pollution.

Insurance is used to mitigate risk or hazards.

Laws are absolute rules which are unjust in some real circumstances and mitigation can be tried as a remedy for these exceptions to the general rule.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT IMMIGRATION*

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Ideally a nation should let in the brightest, best, and educated without asking questions or any delay involved in the immigration process. Unfortunately the poor, uneducated, ballsy, and hopeless also want to immigrate to the wealthy countries and some will risk life and limb to accomplish that end.

Border integrity must be maintained as much as possible but it is inevitable that some will slip across the border and remain undetected for a considerable duration.

What do you do with these illegals? In the United States there are millions who crossed the border and are either working or on welfare and it is unrealistic to deport them all so a compromise must be found.

It makes sense that if an illegal has been in the country from 10 to 15 years and has been gainfully employed during that time then this is evidence that they are a contributing member of society and have found a niche in the economy of the country. Sending them back would be a mistake and they should be given permanent legal status as an immigrant.

To avoid an incentive for others to cross the border in the future there should be the possibility or certainty of eviction or deportation, especially for those illegals on welfare or the government dole. As long as you are not a freeloader and carrying your share of the economic burden and paying taxes then you should have no fear of deportation unless you have a history of criminal activity in the United States or any other country for that matter.

Some will try and play the system and work for 10 to 15 years and then after gaining legal status will try to get on welfare and get a free ride. CHANGES IN WELFARE LAWS is my evergreen truth book which will solve the welfare problem not only for legal citizens but illegals who wind up on the welfare dole.

This is a just compromise for a seemingly insurmountable immediate political problem and the general welfare crisis which is cascading out of control.

 

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THE TRUTH ABOUT SCOLDING***

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Scold: v. to communicate punishment for a bad and/or wrong behavior(s) frequently with anger and/or being judgmental and sometimes with threats of punishment

Many parents frequently scold offspring. They have made a usually impulsive judgment that the offspring have done something bad and/or wrong and express their disapproval in a rather angry punishing tone of voice.

Sometimes the scolding is accompanied with threats of punishment to create a little fear so that the behavior is not repeated again another time. For very young offspring threatened punishment may be a spanking for very serious offenses such as fighting, stealing, and lying if isolation techniques don’t work but for older ones threatening to withdraw a privilege is a perfectly acceptable threat.

Unfortunately this scolding behavior is sometimes used on adults and teenagers with undesirable consequences because many adults and teenagers don’t want to be treated like a child and criticized in an angry tone of voice which frequently leads to arguments and defensive actions for such unjust treatment.

If you are smart then you will limit your scolding to young offspring once in a while when they really deserve a punishing angry tone of voice for doing something really very bad and/or wrong.

Judgmental anger expressed verbally is not only highly aggressive bordering on violence but it is a form of punishment which adults and teenagers frequently rebel against. If you add to your anger and threaten an adult with punishment then it will only make the reaction more rebellious and angry. Don’t scold adults and teenagers but try to frequently discuss disagreements and problems without an angry tone of voice.

 

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THE TRUTH ABOUT DESERVING***

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Deserve: v. to earn a punishment(s) and/or a reward(s) for some behavior(s) but sometimes not getting it completely and/or getting it with some delay

In an ideal world we should be instantly rewarded for doing something good and instantly punished for doing something bad. In the real world we may get a token reward or token punishment or get no reward and no punishment. Sometimes in the real world we may have to do many good things or many bad things before we get the reward or punishment or in effect there is a time delay in getting what we deserve.

Especially in human relationships it may take much time before you develop a good reputation by being honest, sincere, dependable, friendly, competent, and trustworthy. Only after a history of being moral, competent, and nice will humans begin to patronize you and say good things about you which will bring you the rewards which you deserve or hoped for.

Hard work and being nice is not always rewarded as we expect and this can sometimes lead to disappointment and unhappiness. The smart employer gives workers the praise and attention which they deserve and compensates them financially for the good work which they do.

You may feel that you deserve more out of life than what you are getting but remember that it usually takes time to develop a good work history and good relationships with others so don’t expect instant success at work or with humans as a young adult. You need time to develop a good reputation and good work history which humans will begin to respect and start giving you some of the things which you justly deserve.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT THREATS***

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Threat: n. a communication with a promise(s) to do a subset(s) which is frequently a punishment judged by a human(s) recipient to be (bad and/or wrong) and/or (immoral and/or sometimes an incentive for action(s)) and most of samer promise(s) create fear

We are sometimes threatened by a boss with job loss, threatened with divorce by a spouse, threatened with violence by an abusive spouse, threatened by a stalker, and an offspring may threaten to leave home. There are also criminal business threats and bullying in and out of school with miscellaneous threats to life and limb.

Criminal threats are the violent threats but some are hard to prove and prosecution against such threats is rather difficult in many cases.

Blackmail, extortion, and a threat to strike are just a few examples of the way that threats arise in society.

An employee may threaten to leave a job, a close friend may threaten you with the loss of friendship, and a parent may threaten offspring with punishment.
Threats are sometimes used as a last resort when peaceful human interaction fails and usually a threat of punishment of some kind is used to motivate humans to alter their behavior.

Almost no one likes to be threatened but if the threat is not an illegal threat of violence it is something which we come across from time to time and parents frequently have to threaten offspring to get them to behave. The threat of withdrawing a greatly desired privilege as punishment is sometimes very effective in successfully altering behavior.

The implied threat of a fine or imprisonment is what keeps most away from criminal behavior and gets us to pay our taxes.

Loss of a good reputation or ostracism is a looming threat if we do not behave morally.

Cyber threats are a real danger to individuals, businesses, the military, and infrastructure like electrical grids. It is the primary reason why we surf the web cautiously and utilize what we think are security software and precautions to try and avoid cyber threats.

Implied and actual threats which create fear in society is the glue which keeps most humans from illegality and immorality. Take away the fear of punishment from society and it would run wild with dysfunctional and criminal behavior.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 1000 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT RETALIATION***

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Retaliation: n. revengeving without hatred and sometimes with conditional forgiveness

Revengev: v. to impact with a desire to punish for some offense(s) which is usually done with intense hatred  (a new verb for revenge)

Retaliation is the same thing as revenge unless you exclude hatred from it’s expression and occasionally include conditional forgiveness as an option. You can retaliate or want to punish an offender for injuring and/or offending you but it need not be done with hatred and you hope that the retaliation will teach the offender a lesson so that they don’t offend again. Sometimes embarrassment is the only punishment needed if it is a family member or close friend but unfortunately the world is filled with humans without shame and embarrassment is not an option and some form of punishment is necessary in the retaliation.

Trade wars start because tariffs are used as a form of retaliation for unjust trade practices and unless those trade practices are corrected the retaliation is frequently not reversed. If you begin to hate whom you are retaliating against then chances are great that you will never reach a just resolution of the problem because your hateful emotions will dominate in any future trade agreements. Cool logical mutually beneficial compromise is necessary and not the vengeful hateful feelings frequently found in an eye for an eye philosophy or hateful human interaction.

In human relationships retaliation is preferable to revenge and if the offender feels that you hate them then chances are great that they will hate you back and never reform their behavior. “You hurt my feelings by doing or saying that and I hope that you won’t do or say that again” is better than saying “I hate you for hurting my feelings or doing that”.

In close relationships judicious retaliation is frequently the best approach with much conditional forgiveness.  Forgive and forget is NO retaliation for relatively unimportant bad things and is sometimes necessary to avoid resentment and hatred from polluting an otherwise healthy trusting relationship.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 1000 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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Enjoy!!!!!!

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THE TRUTH ABOUT PERSECUTION

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Persecution: n. punishment of a human(s) frequently because of religion and/or ethnic origin and/or cultural differences and/or deviant lifestyle and frequently not for illegality

If you are being persecuted it is frequently not for illegality but because of your religion, ethnic origin, cultural difference, or deviant lifestyle.

Persecuted humans are frequently ostracized by dominant groups of humans who feel that deviation from their standards of behavior is unacceptable.

Persecuted humans are not tolerated very well by ruling majorities in nations and in national large subgroups who crave uniformity of opinion and action.

If you are and feel persecuted then chances are you are much different than the norm.

Genocide is an extreme form of mass persecution and it is something which most condemn.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 1000 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT MERCY

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Mercy: n. being (tolerant and/or compassionate) and/or forgiving when punishment is earned and frequently towards a minor’s misbehavior(s)

When offspring deserve punishment being merciful sometimes means no punishment at all or punishing less severely than expected or justified. It is smart to ask offspring to promise not to do the misdeed again before showing mercy and not punishing.

Fining someone less than the specified maximum fine can also be considered to be a merciful act and some even feel that mercy is punishing a criminal less than what the maximum punishment should be.

In the catholic religion confessing your wrongdoing frequently results in merciful forgiveness of your transgressions and you are not punished for them.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 800 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSErays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT DISCIPLINE

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Discipline: v. to use appropriate rewards and/or punishments to get obedience to a set of rules which limit behavior and create selfcontrol to speed up achieving a new goal(s)

 

Being disciplined by others is sometimes an unpleasant experience but teaching yourself selfdiscipline and disciplining yourself on your own is even harder to do and can be very unpleasant at times. Selfdiscipline is vital to success in life and it basically means learning new knowledge and skills on your own or doing so with the investment of personal time, energy, effort, and achievement.

 

Rewarding with praise or material rewards must be done judiciously so that your rewards are appropriate to the achievement. If you constantly give great enthusiastic praise for mediocre accomplishments or give great material rewards for mediocre or even minimal accomplishments then the one whom you are disciplining will fail to tell the difference between a truly great accomplishment and a mediocre one and your verbal and physical rewards will no longer be a motivating factor. The reward should fit or correspond to the accomplishment just as the punishment should fit or correspond to the crime or bad behavior.

 

Punishment should also be in appropriate degrees so that the one being disciplined can differentiate between very bad, bad, and not so bad results. If an offspring lies or steals then the punishment should be severe with the withdrawal of a very desirable privilege or even a spanking of a very young offspring if lying or stealing is almost becoming habitual. Lying and stealing is a moral transgression and should not be tolerated in the family unit! Being grounded may not be adequate punishment these days but the withdrawal of cell phone or computer privileges may be a deterrent to future bad behavior.

 

Learning new knowledge and skills takes much selfdiscipline and you should start early teaching your offspring the joys of learning new knowledge and skills by example, motivating, and sharing in the learning experience.

 

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THE TRUTH ABOUT BOREDOM

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Most frequently something bores us because it is rather uninteresting and doesn’t seem to have much relevance to our lives so we either ignore it or move on to something more interesting. Listening to boring talking is a common example of boredom caused by something rather uninteresting which doesn’t seem to benefit us in any tangible way.

 

Sometimes spending too much time with something like listening to music for too long begins to bore us and we decide to go on and do something else. We basically deplete our energy resources, feel tired, and are not that motivated to concentrate our attention on the subject matter, especially if what we are doing is not benefiting us in some major way such as making us more money or increasing our enjoyment level to new highs.

 

Finally we may get bored because we have repeated something too many times and it is beginning to feel like deja vue or that we have done that, seen that, and want a new kind of experience. Eating the same food day in and day out, even if it was tasty at first, will begin to bore us and the satisfaction which we get out of the experience frequently has also decreased.  Obviously if the repetitive task is greatly benefiting us with more money or increased enjoyment then the repetitive task will not bore us as much as it would if there is no noticeable benefit.

 

If there is great financial benefit or if something gives us rather high levels of enjoyment then we generally do not get bored with too much repetition or spending too much time doing something. In fact the thing which we might be doing can become so addictive that we never get bored doing it and we may be willing to do it to the point of exhaustion many times. We frequently get bored if what we are doing is no longer a rewarding experience.

 

Boredom: n. sensing decreased interest and decreased mental activity which is frequently caused by (using too much time with a subset(s) and/or doing too much repetition of a subset(s)) and/or spending too much time with a uninteresting subset(s) and/or what we are doing is no longer a rewarding experience

 

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THE TRUTH ABOUT CRIME

(Adam Milner/CU Independent Illustration)

Criminals can broadly be classified into violent and non-violent offenders. The violent ones either threaten you with a weapon and/or words and may follow up with some form of physical aggression. Other violent offenders may vandalize property or break into private property violently and proceed to steal but they are not considered violent offenders.

Non-violent offenders will frequently steal your money and/or property with deception, fraudulent means, or physically without much force.

The violent offenders frequently go to jail if they are caught but the non-violent offenders may be so clever and deceptive that their crime goes undetected for a long duration. Bernie Madoff is just one example of a very clever white collar criminal who stole billions of dollars for a long duration before he got caught with his Ponzi scheme.

Drug offenders both users and pushers are clogging the court system. Drug dealers with much money frequently get light sentences or plea bargain to a lower charge when they are caught making the problem even worse with no respect for the legal system.

As is frequently the case in this country, if you have much money and great lawyers then you can sometimes get away with crime with little or no jail time and minimum fines. This is especially true of bank and corporate fraud which is infrequently prosecuted to the full extent of the law if at all.

Recidivism is rather high or about two thirds return to jail within a five year period. It appears that the prison system is effective in taking criminals off the streets but not very effective in teaching them a lesson or rehabilitating them.

In 2012 the arrest rate 4165 per 100,000 population was about six times the incarceration rate in California so it seems that only about one sixth of those arrested go to jail. Almost 5% of the population get arrested for some crime or suspicion of crime and some perhaps more than once.

About a 33% of black males enter the federal prison system during their lifetime compared to about 6% for whites and about 17% for Hispanics. One can conclude that the poorer you are with dysfunctional families and a bad education the more likely you are to commit crimes because a realistic reliable job is not an option in many cases.

The common crimes are assault and battery, domestic violence, driving crimes, drug crimes, fraud, theft, and sex crimes.

Worldwide the United States has the highest incarceration rate or 716 per 100,000 population or close to 1% and India has one of the lowest or 30 per 100,000 or .0003 %.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, approximately 700 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT PUNISHMENT

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Punishment: n. doing and/or giving a frequently unpleasant subset(s) which is done and/or given for not achieving a goal(s) and/or for doing a (bad and/or wrong) and/or illegal subset(s)

If you misbehave as children you have privileges temporarily suspended, if you are very late coming home then your spouse may harshly criticize you, if you are adulterous you get divorced, if you don’t get a useful education then you will probably not find a good paying job, if you do a lousy job then you get fired or demoted, if you commit a crime and are caught then you go to jail, and if you have a bad personality then you probably will have few if any friends.

These are just a few examples of punishments which humans and society enforces for bad or unacceptable behavior. We would all ideally like to be rewarded for everything which we do but the sad fact is that we do some pretty shitty things and punishments of all kinds will impact you in your life both small and large.

Many are leading unhappy unfulfilling lives and what they don’t realize that it is frequently punishment for not doing necessary things in the past such as following good role models. Life is not fair or just and it is frequently because you didn’t have good parents, good friends, or good role models to follow or imitate.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, approximately 700 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT CRUELTY

Screen-Shot-2014-01-27-at-8.41.47-AM Historically capital punishment was frequently very cruel such as the breaking wheel, flaying, disembowelment, crucifixion, impalement, crushing, stoning, burning, dismemberment, sawing, etc. It was designed to create fear in the public so citizens would not commit serious capital crimes. Severe punishment was seen as a guaranteed deterrent against serious crime.

Historically you were punished for behaving badly or criminally with violence which was designed to create pain, suffering, or humiliation in the offender. Spare the rod and spoil the child was the accepted philosophy and practice by most parents.

Today cruel and unusual punishment is forbidden but there are still cruel humans who delight in causing pain, suffering, and humiliation in others. Concentration camps and genocide in some African countries which is relatively recent is proof that full blown human cruelty can surface at any moment if we are not vigilant against such atrocities.

A cruel boss may humiliate you by name calling using words such as stupid, crazy, fool, and incompetent. He can make you work many hours overtime without overtime pay and make you do unpleasant tasks such as cleaning the floors, windows, taking out the garbage, and mowing the lawn. Suffering by working very long hours and being humiliated may not be very painful but it can be psychologically devastating and cause much mental stress.

Cruel physically abusive spouses may physically abuse even their offspring and humiliate with profanities and name calling. Most choose not to live with cruelty and wind up eventually divorcing.

Sometimes pets are abused mostly through neglect or not feeding them and this is considered cruel behavior. Some pets are even beaten physically and are traumatized for life and no longer make nice loving pets for new owners. Many substandard zoos can also be considered cruel and unusual punishment for wildlife.

Human offspring are programmed genetically with the potential to be violent, aggressive predators and are basically vengeful creatures with an eye for an eye tendencies. Human society is constantly struggling to eliminate as much of this cruel behavior as possible but our prisons are still places with an abundance of cruel humans who even enjoy causing pain, suffering, and humiliation.

   

Cruelty: n. willfully causing pain and/or suffering and/or humiliation in an animal(s) and/or seeing the pain and/or suffering and/or humiliation of an animal(s) and sensing pleasure

 

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, approximately 700 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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THE TRUTH ABOUT MOTIVATION

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Motivation: n. stimulating and/or preventing a behavior(s) with a subset(s) which is frequently done with (the promise of a reward and/or punishment) and/or (a command and/or an encouragement(s)) and/or a threat

Humans and things can motivate our behavior or create desires which make us do things. A desire arises and we either fulfill that desire right away or we delay the fulfillment of the desire until a later time.

A desire to do something or not do something is probably motivated by a reward and/or punishment and ultimately it is a desire to achieve a goal.

Many of us have simple goals such as eating, drinking, working, and enjoying life with pleasant pastimes.

Others also have complex goals such as making much money, starting a business or organization, learning complicated skills for a high paying profession, and writing a best seller.

Staying motivated or maintaining a desire for a long duration trying to achieve complex goals is very hard because it frequently means much sustained hard work, many failures, much support from other humans, and an undying devotion which few are willing to make. Unrelenting self-motivation is necessary to achieve long duration complex goals and it helps if you have talent which makes the achievement much easier.

The success of other humans and ongoing support from family, close friends, teachers, coworkers, coaches, mentors, inspirational leaders, and role models can all be sources of motivation which keeps you trying to achieve important goals even in the face of much hardship and setbacks.

Not frequently mentioned is the importance that emotional motivation plays in successful human relationships and even relationships on the job. Life has many setbacks and if you find a significant other who supports you emotionally when you are struggling with personal or job problems then you are truly being helped or supported. If you reciprocate the emotional support then this can create a symbiotic relationship which will thrive through the good and bad times.

On the job having a boss who cares about maintaining your emotional optimism by appropriate praise, always acknowledging the contribution you make and not stealing it from you, delegating some authority to you, letting you improve your skills on the job, and sometimes saying something good about you in the presence of coworkers can be effective in giving you a sense of purpose on the job. This will make you feel good enough even though you may not be rewarded with as much money as you think that you deserve as a reward.

CONCLUSION:

We have many desires in our lives which motivate us to do good and bad things and our priorities may change in life depending upon the circumstances. That is why it is important to try and find good humans to associate with who motivate us to do good things and not bad things, moral things and not immoral ones.

Learning to prioritize our desires and controlling them successfully is a major key to happiness. Uncontrolled impulsive desires, especially if they are bad, can lead to a life of misery and turmoil so try to change those impulsive bad desires before they ruin a potentially good life.

There are many rewards and punishments in life. If you are smart then you will try to optimize your rewards and minimize the punishments with a realistic appraisal of your abilities so that you don’t crash and burn trying to do the impossible or  desiring what you can’t have.

 

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10 IMPORTANT SOCIAL TRUTHS ABOUT HUMAN NATURE: PART 3

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At times your unconsciousness is truer than your conscious mind

This is just a statement that sometimes your impulsive feelings about something are truer than what your mind thinks ought to be done in a certain circumstance where your thinking may be bad and/or uncertain.

 

Severe punishment awaits really bad humans

 

In most societies the punishment is usually made to fit the crime and if the crime is considered very bad then the punishment is also usually very severe. Social ostracism may be the only punishment for a non criminal offense but being a pariah can be very punishing and greatly hamper your interactions with humans.

 

Bad intentions can have good results

 

Firing someone out of spite and intentionally trying to cause financial hardship can lead to someone finding a better job. It can even lead to the hiring of a better employee so both are examples of a bad intention causing two good results.  Bad intentions seldom cause good results but sometimes there are exceptions.

 

 

Rudeness is a weak human’s imitation of power.

 

Rudeness is just one of the many defects of a weak human with a bad personality and it does not necessarily mean that the human is intentionally trying to behave powerfully.

 

 

Hope lasts until death.

 

This is just one way of saying that hope is a recurring theme throughout a lifetime and this is especially true for lottery players who always hope for the big win no matter how many times they are disappointed in real life.

 

Roll with the punches.

 

This is just a bad way of saying that you should not stop trying to reach your goals and sink into depression when bad things happen to you in life.

 

Man cannot live by bread alone.

 

This is just a way to say that there is usually more to life than just getting and eating food.

 

Liars frequently set their own traps.

 

Liars lie that they are doing or have done something which they are not doing or haven’t done.  Their deceptions are frequently destroyed by third parties who tell the truth or the memory of their lies fades and they start contradicting themselves later on and get caught for lying.

 

Just because everybody’s doing something, doesn’t mean it’s right.

 

This should be rephrased to make it more accurate. Just because everyone in a group of humans is doing something doesn’t make it the right thing to do.  Offspring especially have to be taught that just because a large group of humans in school are doing it, it may not be the right thing to do.

 

History repeats itself.

 

This is true to a large extent because new generations of humans continue to make the same human mistakes that older generations have made only in a new setting.  This is because new generations seldom learn everything of importance from the mistakes of older generations. Also historical bad habits, untruths or myths carry on into future generations and make the probability of old mistakes being repeated more likely.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lHbvGM9qIFc

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