Tag Archives: trustworthiness

UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 1724!!!

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HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR PERSONALITY!!!

Ideally you have great role model moral parents, have been raised with one or more siblings, have role model moral relatives, and have had good role model friends in your formative years. If this is the case then you probably also have a good personality which needs little improvement.

On the other hand if you haven’t had good moral role model parents, are an only child, have had bad role model relatives, and have had bad role model friends in your formative years then your personality is probably pretty bad and needs a radical change. Fortunately relatively few of us fall into these two extremes of good moral role models and bad somewhat immoral role models.

If you want to radically improve your very bad personality then it is mostly a lost cause if you are already an adult so my recommendations for improving a personality apply to humans who are flawed but not extremely flawed personality types.

Why is being moral or ethically sound so important? It is because trust is the bond which attracts and keeps relationships going and without trust relationships fall apart sooner or later. To establish trust you must have integrity which basically means being honest and moral. Being moral or ethical is not lying, not stealing, not committing adultery if married, and not murdering. My morality also includes not destroying biodiversity and not being inefficient but these two important subjects are covered in my book SECULAR MORAL CODE on Amazon. So one of the most important factors in a good personality is being TRUSTWORTHY which is the foundation of almost all good relationships and personality types.

There are other factors which make for a trustworthy relationship. You must also be as dependable as possible and try to fulfill all your promises. Competence in what you do also builds trust because you can’t depend on an incompetent human who makes too many mistakes, forgets too often, or is pretentious about his or her actual abilities. Bad gossiping, spreading false rumors about someone, or lying about a human also destroys trust and back stabbing is even worse.

So if you are on the road to improving your personality then trying to become more trustworthy is priority number one on your list of things to do. If you are trustworthy then you will have a good reputation and may even be admired though some of your opinions and beliefs may be different from those with which you are communicating with or involved in relationships with.

Another very important personality trait is an honest or sincere interest in other humans, especially in those that you choose to interact with and form relationships with. A genuine interest in another human is conveyed by listening carefully to what is said, asking appropriate questions and following up on what is being said, interrupting only when the conversation gets boring or seems to be going nowhere, showing empathy with present and past circumstances, offering helpful advice where appropriate, motivating one to continue doing something good, praising one for doing something worthwhile, sharing similar experiences or interests verbally and sometimes physically, being sincere in your criticisms if any so they don’t come across harsh or rude,  interjecting humor where appropriate, and maintaining an optimistic and enthusiastic mood or atmosphere or smiling, nodding, and gesturing appropriately.

Yes, it is hard showing genuine interest in a human that is not very interesting to begin with but there is social etiquette to deal with these humans in a polite and respectful way. If you want details then read my book GOOD MODERN BEHAVIORS on Amazon.

You can be an introvert and be respected and admired by relatively few individuals or you can be an extrovert and be respected and admired by relatively many individuals. Neither being an introverted type of personality or an extroverted type of personality is good or bad. Both are good if you are trustworthy or have integrity and are basically a moral human. This is not an article designed to help you to become more extroverted or introverted since introverts generally try to avoid excessive human drama and limit human interactions and extroverts often like human drama and interactions with many humans.

Ultimately an extroverted human personality can interact with a wide variety of human personality types successfully and it is something which is called emotional intelligence. It is a learned skill and is usually acquired with a lot of experience with all kinds of humans. Many introverts may lack this emotional intelligence with a wide range of human personality types but they may have great emotional intelligence with relatively few carefully chosen individuals. I suppose you could call introvert emotional intelligence quality emotional intelligence and extroverted emotional intelligence quantity emotional intelligence. This quality versus quantity statement is just a spontaneous thought which I had and need not be taken that seriously if you are confused by it.

Happiness is contagious and if you are a happy individual then this will attract other humans. In most cases the happiest humans are those who enjoy setting and pursuing short and long duration goals and try to achieve them. They are usually the doers and not just the dreamers. The happiest are those who set realistic short and long duration goals and develop confidence and a can do attitude with successful achievement along the way.

There are the super ambitious happy entrepreneurs but you can also be considered ambitious and happy if you want to maintain or improve your health by eating organic, sleeping enough, exercising on a regular basis, self educating yourself by reading useful information which improves your knowledge and skills, and trying to prepare for a better paying or more fulfilling job and more interesting life.

Being happy is a state of mind which you are responsible for to a large extent. If you want to improve your personality then research core values or personality traits and self educate yourself about them. Find out yourself details about things such as compassion, caring, selfishness, friendship, kindness, optimism, responsibility, creativity, curiosity, sharing, etc. or read details about these concepts in my book SECULAR MORAL CODE. Yes, you can also search my encyclopedic blog at uldissprogis.com using those keywords and you shouldn’t come away disappointed.

Finally, once you determine what part of your personality you want to improve you can research it further and start taking steps trying to improve it. Best wishes. Uldis

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4900 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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GOOD RELATIONSHIPS!!!

Most young adults were asked what would make them happy and a popular response is to have money or be rich and famous. In a longitudinal Harvard study beginning in the 1930’s and still going on about 75 years later the conclusion seems to be that GOOD RELATIONSHIPS are the key to a happy life. We will investigate what a good relationship is and how you can optimize the chances that you will have good relationships throughout a lifetime.

There are many kinds of relationships which can even be called forms of friendships which are very close, close, casual, and rather remote or what could be called acquaintances.

There are minimal or borderline relationships where the contact between a human is minimal or even nonexistent. We are talking here about the relationships which you may have with national politicians, celebrities, writers, or hero like role models which you mostly just view, listen to, or read about but they still impact your life and choices to some extent. Most of these interactions are almost a one way street where you view, listen, or read but don’t actually have physical contact with the human beyond just voting for a politician, attending a celebrity gathering,  just viewing a video, listening to a podcast, or reading about someone in an article or book.

Our primary focus will be on adult relationships because parental relationships between parent and child have a different dynamic since most parents are in charge or are responsible for supervising their offspring or adopted children. If you want to learn more about parent child relationships then read my book MODERN PARENTING by Uldis Sprogis on Amazon.

Perhaps a good starting point to understand what a good relationship is, we should briefly cover what bad relationships are so that you can try to avoid them.

In a bad relationship the human lies much and can’t be trusted, is immoral, the human is not dependable, is incompetent, has bad addictions, or is not a good conversationalist.

In a bad marital relationship the spouse may be verbally and even physically abusive and argues most of the time about even rather trivial things. At the other extreme a spouse may be non communicative and basically ignores the partner most of the time. This too is a bad relationship.

Not so obvious is the fact that bad relationships should be terminated as soon as possible. If it is a bad spousal relationship then divorce is a very real option and if it is a bad friend then you should seriously consider ending the friendship since it will handicap you in the long duration.

Trust is the bond which keeps good relationships going and if you can’t trust someone then a good relationship is not possible. If a relationship without trust exists then it is a highly dysfunctional one with a lot of misery associated with it. Some spouses stay in a bad relationship because they believe it is best for the children or out of financial necessity but this is a fallacy because if you are in a dysfunctional spousal relationship then you are a terrible role model for the children who will grow up and also probably be dysfunctional in their marital relationship. So integrity or being honest and moral is vital to a trusting good relationship.

In a nutshell if you have integrity, are trustworthy, dependable, competent, sincere, friendly, a good conversationalist, and empathetic then you have the potential to be respected and maybe even admired by others. Yes, you can be admired for just being rich but if you don’t have the above good personality then you will not be respected by most humans.

Some humans complain that they don’t have interesting friends whom they can interact with. The truth is that if you want interesting friends then you YOURSELF must also be interesting so that you can share mutual satisfying interests. If you are looking for a friend who has a great personality, is friendly, is optimistic, and does interesting things and has the time and money to do those things then you too must have a great personality, be friendly, be optimistic, and have the time and money to pursue those interesting things.

Not commonly realized is the basic fact that the more interests which you have in common in a relationship, the chances are that you will have a better relationship since it won’t become that boring very soon. So basically if you are an interesting human with many interests then the chances of meeting someone with one or more similar interests is more probable.

Before you go out looking for good relationships make sure that you have one or more important things to offer someone. If your personality is not that great then make an effort to improve it before you try to enter relationships. Similarly, if you have almost no important interests to talk about then start finding some interests to make you more of a magnet in a relationship.

Sometimes you find out that a human is interested in something which you wish you knew more about. Take some time out to research the interest and learn the basics about it. Then get back to them and continue the conversation by showing that you did some research into the interest and have some unanswered questions. Most will appreciate that you really put in some effort trying to understand their area of interest and most will gladly share their experiences with the interest. This approach is especially valuable if you have a gut feeling that you like a human’s personality and would like to include them on your friend’s or networking list.

Ultimately you should put in much effort improving yourself first, before you start looking for someone that you may want to connect with. Become someone with an optimistic attitude and friendly personality for starters and then make yourself into an interesting human even though it probably won’t happen overnight.

To start a relationship you must interact with humans who potentially have similar interests and some of the best places to meet others is on the job, with friends of relatives, with friends of friends, at events which interest you and that you attend, at social gatherings like weddings, sporting events, religious services, community events, volunteering, political campaigns, and on the internet via social media, dating sites, and clubs or causes. Yes, you can also meet humans at bars, the coffee shop, movie theater, and in the supermarket but the chances that you will meet someone compatible are rather remote.

Knowing thyself is very important in life and if you don’t know or are unaware of your bad habits and good ones then you really will never consciously know how to improve yourself. In the book GOOD RELATIONSHIPS by Uldis Sprogis you will discover what good and bad habits are and then you can courageously proceed to decrease or totally eliminate some bad habits and replace them with more of your good habits and maybe even some good new ones.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4800 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 1305!!!

 

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4600 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 1296!!!

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4600 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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ANOTHER PSYCHOLOGICAL RESEARCH FAILURE TRYING TO BE SCIENTIFIC!!!

I will logically try to explain why humans can’t be stereotyped into personality types!

https://uldissprogis.com/2017/08/24/the-truth-about-the-big-5-personality-traits/

As described in the above article or the truth about the big 5 personality traits there are actually only three discernible personality types not traits which are trustworthiness, extroversion, and conscientiousness.

Trustworthiness: adj. having integrity and dependability and competence

Extrovert: n. a sociable human with a tendency to be overtly expressive.

Conscientious: adj. adequate caring and devoted effort to do right.

The new study, led by Luís Amaral of the McCormick School of Engineering, was published Sept. 17 by the journal Nature Human Behaviour.

The new proposed personality types are average, self-centered, role model, and reserved but none are defined accurately and are purely hypothetical undefined concepts so not very scientific to begin with.

According to Amaral who led the research effort only self-centered humans are actually low in conscientiousness and I would venture to say that there are degrees of conscientiousness and that not all average, reserved, and role model types are conscientious to the same degree as that shown by the questionnaire results. Teenagers were used to measure conscientiousness and yes, many teenagers are not that conscientious but that is a function of immaturity or age and not a measure of adult self-centeredness which may not have low levels of conscientiousness unless you are talking about immature adults.

Measuring extroversion, it seems that all 4 categories had about the same degree of extroversion and frankly many of those are actually introverts which the test did not test for. So measuring the degree of extroversion was a useless waste of effort since it didn’t vary in any of the 4 categories. All 4 categories were extroverts.

The degree of trustworthiness is the most significant variable in a personality and frankly there was no test for it in the questionnaire. How trustworthy were the average, reserved, self-centered, and role model types? Vastly unknown, a significant variable which was not tested for. The ultimate determiner of successful human interactions or relationships is the degree to which you are trusted by other humans. If you are not very trustworthy or moral, honest, dependable, and competent then you are definitely not a role model type and probably just average with a certain degree of untrustworthiness as would be the case for the average, reserved, and self-centered humans.

The 4 personality types are not unique without overlap. Basically you could say that the role model type is the leader type and the average type are the followers. However, even some average parents are good role models or leaders for their offspring so the leader-led dichotomy is not unique personality types without overlap.

Reserved humans can be considered to be more introverted or less sociable so it can be said that most reserved humans are introverts as a personality type. So two more distinct personality types could be grouped into introverts or extroverts with considerable overlap in many cases because an introvert may be very reserved in public but very extroverted with coworkers on a job which he or she is doing competently.

Self-centered or selfish individuals can also be role models or leaders such as unusual Trump and many other politicians who use their position to selfishly increase personal wealth. So once again this proves that there are no distinct personality types or characteristics which you can assign to an individual since every individual is unique and has overlapping personality types or characteristics at certain times and under certain circumstances. Every individual has degrees of personality types or characteristics so you can say that most individuals are average in being led, below average in role model characteristics, average in selfishness or self-centeredness, and below average in reservedness or introversion.

How trustworthy were the individuals taking the questionnaires and to what degree did some of them try to deceive or lie? Can a questionnaire really test for trustworthiness or is this going to be the eternal unknown in psychology?

A human at times has been observed to be rude, uncaring, inconsiderate, selfish, sympathetic, extroverted, secretive, argumentative, deceptive, generous, confident, aggressive, etc.  What personality type does he or she fit into? The answer is none of the above! The unanswered question is how FREQUENTLY is the human rude, uncaring, inconsiderate, selfish, sympathetic, extroverted, secretive, etc?

Humans can’t be pigeon holed into distinct personality types or characteristics under all times and circumstances because often the time and the circumstance dictates how a human will react or behave. Frankly there are too many undefined variables in any personality analysis and no one human fits neatly into one or more stereotyped categories or personality types.

There is moral and immoral human behavior but you can’t argue that there is a moral and and immoral personality type because there are degrees of morality and immorality depending on what human you are talking about.

Conclusion:

Using 5 undefined personality traits to describe 4 new personality types also undefined is absurdity. Merely using 5 undefined dubious personality traits is not even closely being scientific and certainly not worthy of publication and dissemination to academia or the general public. It is pure BS research and gives psychologists an even worse reputation than before as being a lot of hot air and nothing less. The sad fact is that the questionnaires used in the research are useless to any logically thinking human and just politically correct ideology to make psychologists feel good about themselves and their shoddy profession.

 

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4500 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

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UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 1186!!!

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4400 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

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UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 1175!!!

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4400 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

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6 SMALL TIPS ON MILDLY INFLUENCING HUMANS!!!

The real major way to influence humans in a good way, be respected, and maybe even be admired is to have integrity or be honest and moral, be trustworthy, sincere, dependable, friendly, competent, empathetic, and a good conversationalist. If you have mutual interests and share them then you are well on your way to having a good impact or influence on others and you will probably benefit in major ways yourself.

That said, here are 6 helpful small tips which will increase your ability to influence others and perhaps be better liked.

Asking small favors if done right will make humans like you more if you have had little interaction with them to start with. Most humans like to help others and feel good about it after they have helped, especially if it costs them very little time, little effort, and almost no money in the process. Asking for a favor is especially effective if it is something which the human loves, likes, or enjoys such as a favorite food, drink, or book. If you generally agree or express a liking for something a human likes then they generally will like you more.

Start with- “Could you do me a small favor?” (and smile)

“I’ll pay for it but could you please bring me back a sample of your favorite donut, cookie, candy, sandwich, taco, soft drink, beer, wine, etc.?”

“Could I please borrow the book that you read and enjoyed?”

“Could I please borrow the book after you are finished with it?”

“Could I please borrow for a day your rake, shovel, blower, power tool, blender, etc.”

“Please lend me your _ for a minute, hour, or day.”

“May I use your telephone for an important call?”

“Would you mind closing the window?”

Could you help me with my homework?

“Could you take a look at this email and recommend an answer?”

 

If you want humans to think highly of you then remembering and using their NAME is one of the most important things in relationships, especially if you will not see the human for a long time but will run into them again in a casual way.

 

Flattery can be used sparingly and in its best form it is sincere praise. “Great job, that was masterful, loved what you did, gorgeous outfit, inspiring performance, couldn’t have done it better, wow, impressive, you are special, etc.” Be careful because if you flatter someone who doesn’t deserve it then it can backfire as insincere phony exaggeration.

 

Unless you’re a boss telling someone that they are wrong or correcting their mistakes, correcting puts humans in defensive mode trying to protect their ego and they will not be very receptive to any requests which you may decide to make or follow up with.

 

One of the best ways to bond or show empathy for a human is to repeat something which they have said and that makes humans aware that you are listening to them or are interested in what they are saying. They will be more comfortable and friendly with you since you seem to care about them by this repetition or reflective listening.

 

Nodding at someone during a conversation seems to imply that you are agreeing with them and they are more likely to do you a favor when you ask for it or in effect they are nodding back and agreeing with you.

 

While these 6 tips are not that important in old close friendships they are sometimes useful in casual acquaintances or friendships.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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INTERNET OR TEXTING COMMUNICATIONS WITH MEN BEFORE THE FIRST DATE!!!

Before offering advice on communicating with potential dates on the internet or with texting it is important to state why so much of the communication is unsuccessful.

 

One major reason that successful communication is so difficult is that there are many males and some females who are deceptive and lie over the internet posing as someone who they really are not. They basically are afraid to reveal who they truly are because they fear that they won’t be physically attractive enough or financially well off enough. They may try to post fake pictures and claim to hold down great jobs when in reality they are average looking and unemployed or working at minimum wage. So try not to be gullible and maintain a healthy suspicion if he sounds too good to be true.

 

The second reason that successful internet communication is so difficult is that most of the males and also females are really not ready for serious dating. The primary reasons may be because of no job or poor income and any real attempts at dating usually result in very disappointing colossal failures because serious dating usually consumes much time, energy, and money.

 

Your whole purpose for texting or communicating with men should be to eventually find out if they are going to be a good marital or business partner. You may be a modern promiscuous female just having fun and falsely assuming that what all men really want is immediate sexual intimacy. You may honestly feel that sex should be given to any male that interests you greatly and you will find many playboy males who want to show you a good time but no eventual commitment.

 

Texting or meeting a new human face to face for the first time is basically the same approach. You want to quickly find out if the man is going to be a good potential friend or mate without being too flirtatious or beating around the bush. If the man is just texting or searching for naïve females to take advantage of them sexually then it is better to find out the truth as soon as possible rather than beat around the bush with vague and emotionally fulfilling communications.

 

You ideally want a male who has integrity, is trustworthy, is dependable, is competent, and a good communicator. He should be someone who is not afraid to answer tough and eventually somewhat personal questions so don’t be afraid to ask tough questions and eventually some rather personal questions. You want men with the courage to confront almost any question that you may ask. If you feel that you may have offended him with some comment then quickly apologize and move on in the relationship as long as it lasts.

 

If you are an average looking female without a college education hoping to land a successful college educated male with a good career or job then you are usually wasting your time. If you are a college educated woman with a good career or job then beware of males without adequate education who have no job or very poor ones, especially if they are very handsome. The old saying is still basically true that “birds of a feather flock together” so try to stay away from males outside your comfort and educational zone unless you are extremely attractive and sexy.

 

In effect don’t aim too high and don’t aim too low in desperate fashion because the probability of making the right long duration connection with a male is rather low or remote over the internet or in person.

 

Here are some suggested questions to ask:

 

What do you do for a living?

This question may frighten away many males who have no job or poor ones and that is precisely the reason for the question because you don’t want to waste your time and energy on a financially poor male. If the male has a good job then he will be very willing to tell you about it and maybe brag a little. Talking about his job is a good way to boost his ego with further follow up questions about the job.

Have you always done x for a living?

This is a good follow up question to the first one because you can maybe catch a male in a lie about his job or profession if his prior jobs do not fit his current job status plausibly.

Are you a local?

Long distance relationships fail quite frequently so unless you have the money to travel stay with potential local relationships and stay away from long distance ones.

Long distance relationships are like exciting honeymoons every time you briefly meet physically and are very deceptive indicators of lasting happiness. If you or the male move and live together for a year you may decide that the relationship was never meant to be a lasting one.

What do you do in your free time?

This question will reveal whether the male is just vegetating or doing some interesting things to fill his free time such as trying to improve himself or mostly spending his money on rather trivial pursuits.

Do you have any hobbies?

A good mate is one who usually has a life outside of work so hobbies are one way of determining where his interests also lie outside of work.

How long have you had that hobby?

Some men will brag and maybe deceive females into thinking that they have expensive and interesting hobbies so this is a way to find out if he is deceiving you or has had the hobby for a relatively long time.

Do you have any children?

This question and theme will eventually find out if he is recently divorced or maybe is still married.

 

After these few initial questions you can end the first or initial interaction until the next time when you can continue to probe deeper with more personal questions.

 

Do you like your job?

If he doesn’t like his job then you can ask a follow up question and ask if he is going to do anything about a lousy job. You can find out if he has bigger plans or will be stuck in a miserable job on into the near foreseeable future.

How long have you lived here?

You will find out if he is a native local or someone relocating due to job or other reasons.

Do you have many friends?

You can find out if he is somewhat of an extrovert or maybe an introvert with few friends and maybe only one close friend.

What are your future plans?

This will reveal whether the male has some ambition or has too much unrealistic ambition and is vainly hoping to become a celebrity star in some field.

What interesting places have you travelled to?

You can find out if his interests are local or international in scope. A follow up question would be -Where would you like to travel to if you had the opportunity?

What is your favorite food or drink?

Eating is a universal pleasurable pastime and you can find out whether he cooks himself, is a junk food addict, one eating much organic food, or a food gourmet going to restaurants.

Are you on Facebook or Instagram?

You can determine how deeply into social media he is with follow up questions.

After determining whether they are a potential future friend or mate ask for personal information such as an email or telephone number and use phrases such as- It was great talking to you. It would be nice if we kept in touch. What is your email or cellphone number?

Finally, before an actual first date it is important to call the man and speak to him over the phone verbally. You will usually find out pretty quickly if he is the same man on the phone as he is on the internet. Voice fluctuations and his ability to think on his feet instantaneously will become apparent with a phone call and you can often sense if the right vibes are there for actual first date attempts.

 

 

The next questions and some direct quotes with some variations are based on Matthew Hussey’s article “9 Magic Texts No Man Can Resist”. Frankly you should be suspicious of any article with the term Magic in it and celebrity Hussey is guilty of misleading a mass audience of women in this instance.

 

When he asks you what you’re up to?

 

If you are doing something interesting or have plans to do something which doesn’t sound boring then tell him honestly what you are up to. If you are up to nothing then you can say “I’m taking a shower and will head out later.” If he follows up with “where are you going to head out?” then you had better be prepared to tell him where or he will suspect that you are lying. That is why it is important to be as truthful as possible and not be lying or deceptive in your answers.

If you don’t think that you are a very interesting human doing interesting things then stay single and start on a course of self improvement before you seriously try to make internet connections with males.

 

“Just bought this. What do you think?”

 

Men are visual creatures and will respond to a picture of you which is attractive but not overly sexy. He will probably compliment you in some way and it is an opportunity to find out if it is a sincere compliment or an exaggerated and insincere one.

 

“You should be here right now.”

 

This suggests that you would want him to be where you are because seemingly something interesting or exciting is going on. Once again he could ask why? Then you will be in a bind if you are not doing anything interesting or exciting. Once again vague statements can be intriguing and good sources for follow up communication but you should be ready to explain or state WHY or you will come across as a deceptive fraud if you aren’t doing anything interesting or exciting.

 

“I just had an incredible burger! Almost sexual.”

 

Men like food so a tasty food discovery is always an exciting event. However, be careful about inserting sexual in your phrase unless you may want to get personally sexually intimate in the near future. These days women are more promiscuous than in earlier times but I would reserve sexual intimacy for men who are potentially good marriage partners and you have known them long enough to feel that they are potential good marital partners.

 

“This jacket would look attractive on you.”

 

You could use the same sentence with “look HOT on you” but that has sexual connotations and should be used only if you think he considers you more as a friend than a romantic relationship. Using the word hot can be considered sexual baiting if you don’t intend to get sexual with him any time soon.

 

“As hot as you are, I don’t move that fast.” “But I would be happy to see your handsome face if you want to take me on a date this or next week.”

“Let’s start out as friends and consider sexual intimacy when and if we become close friends.” “ But I would be happy to see your handsome face if you want to take me on a date this or next week.” (This is an honest smart response designed for a smart male.”

This is a good way to turn away a premature sexual advance yet convey your opinion that he is sexually attractive but you are not ready to get sexually intimate. Whether you believe it or not men who are interested in a future wife don’t want one that is sexually promiscuous or one who is overly free with her sexual intimacy. If you develop a reputation as a woman who sleeps around a lot then you will attract many noncommittal males.

 

“I am not sure we can be friends anymore”

 

This can either mean that you are breaking up the friendship or you want the relationship to develop past the friendship phase. You may be asked WHY so make sure that you have a truthful answer which makes sense. “I want our relationship to become more exclusive because my feelings for you are becoming rather intense.” or “I want a more exclusive relationship with you.”  or “I think I may be falling in love with you.”

Conclusion:

Being honest and expecting honesty should be the guiding principle in any male female interaction. If the male is caught in an intentional lie or is being intentionally deceptive about something important then drop him like a hot potato. Trust is the bond which makes for lasting relationships. Start lying and trust breaks down and there is no good relationship.

Make sure first that you are a woman a man needs and make sure the man is someone you need beyond just a mere sugar daddy or a man financially well off.

You want a male who appreciates you for who you are and who you are hoping to become. Stay single until you are genuinely a good catch for a male that fits your idea of a good father who will be a parent to your future offspring. Ideally he should be a motivating or encouraging, confident, interesting personality who will grow with you in a relationship and in life skills and not become a repetitive uninteresting bore stagnating in life.

STAY SINGLE until you have much more to offer in a relationship than just your vagina! If you want someone with integrity or morality and honesty, trustworthiness, dependability, competence, and with a good job then be someone with integrity, trustworthiness, dependability, competence, and a good job. Yes, many men ideally prefer beautiful, sexy, females but few can realistically afford them because they are usually high maintenance.

Promiscuity is a great enemy to lasting marital relationships. Promiscuity is a bad addictive habit. Adultery is almost inevitable in formerly promiscuous males and females. My opinions on dating may seem conservative and traditional in many ways but they are tried and true techniques which seldom fail in real life in the long duration. Give in to the promiscuity temptation and you are very likely to join the vast number of eventual failed marriages in the modern world if you get that far.

Due to economic uncertainty and a premium on technological jobs, if you are the average liberal arts major then plan for a rather poor single existence for a relatively long duration. Many are choosing to continue living with their parents if permitted after graduation and becoming financially independent and living on your own is becoming increasingly difficult.

Female biological clocks are always ticking but rushing into a marriage in desperation is often a formula for failure and much sustained misery in life.

As long as you are slowly trying to improve yourself in an enthusiastic, determined way then the odds for landing a good future male also increase. Above everything else, never stop trying to get better because a better man should eventually pop up in your life and decide to stay.

My sister in law had quite a few failed relationships in her life until she met her  husband at the age of 50. Yes, she will never have offspring of her own but she is finally married and it seems happily married for the time being. Those prior men frankly primarily used her for sex and never intended to make a long duration commitment.

Some women may feel that being used sexually is better than being ignored but that is not a recipe for long duration happiness for most females.

No one is the final authority on dating in the modern world including myself. Humans vary widely in looks, abilities, and circumstances. Use your own further research to find dating pointers from other sources which maybe fit your own view of male female relationships better. Some relationships can be quite playful with their share of bullshit so adjust your dating to some males who are a little on the risky side if you want some unpredictability and excitement in a relationship.

There is another saying that “Nothing ventured, nothing gained.” It basically means that you should take calculated risks occasionally or you will not gain anything or gain useful knowledge, experience, and achievement. Take a chance and you might succeed or at least learn from the failure and get more emotional intelligence about human males and humans in general.

I offer the following link for all those who have not analyzed themselves or have not taken the time to know themselves. You will find out that it greatly helps to know yourself before you try to improve yourself which is what life should be all about if you want to be happy in the long duration.

https://uldissprogis.com/2017/12/22/analyzing-yourself-to-know-thyself/

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

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THE TRUTH ABOUT THE BIG 5 PERSONALITY “TRAITS”!!!

The theoretical big 5 personality traits are extraversion, agreeableness, conscientiousness, neuroticism, and openness.

Trust is supposedly a subset of agreeableness but it isn’t because if you have a tendency to not trust someone then your neuroticism will increase, your openness will decrease, you will become less of an extrovert, and have a less agreeable attitude. About the only personality ”trait” which will remain relatively unaffected will be your conscientiousness. A tendency to trust others or be suspicious of humans is a far more important behavior attitude and behavior and trustworthiness can be considered to be a relatively independent and very important personality trait.

If you have a friendly helping attitude and behavior towards others and are empathetic, caring, kind, affectionate, and altruistic then it is not a subset of agreeableness only. You will tend to be more extroverted, less neurotic, more open, and more agreeable. So empathy, caring, kindness, affection, and altruism are not subsets of agreeableness. They are however a subset of conformity to accepted social norms for friendly helping behavior. Agreeableness is not a unique personality trait but merely a tendency to conform or a subset of conformity to accepted social norms.

Neuroticism is just a manifestation of neurosis which is basically too much anxiety with avoidance behaviors. Sadness, mood swings, and emotional instability are not common to all neurotics since healthy individuals also experience sadness and mood swings in various degrees. You don’t have to be sad or moody and be emotionally unstable. Neuroticism is not a personality “trait” but rather a dysfunctional way of handling the stress of everyday life.

Openness is basically an individual who welcomes the possibility of change and someone who is not open tends to resist change of any kind and is often in a status quo personal position and will almost dogmatically defend it. Openness if defined as a willingness to change or a willingness to be exposed to or try new things such as new ideas and new experiences would almost be acceptable. Openness then is an adventurous and curious attitude about life which creative individuals often need. Openness also implies an absence of secrecy or frank behavior so the definition of openness is very subjective since you can also be open to immoral or criminal behavior too. Openness is too subjective and complex a concept to have an accurate non contradictory definition and can’t be considered to be a well defined personality ”trait”.

 

Conscientiousness could be considered to be a relatively well defined personality trait because it is basically adequate caring and devoted effort to doing right.

Conscientious:  adj. adequate caring and devoted effort to do right

 

Extraversion could be a relatively well defined personality trait since some humans are more sociable and overtly expressive with other humans.

Extrovert: n. a sociable human with a tendency to be overtly expressive

 

Thus as you can see the big 5 personality “traits” have been watered down to only 2 big personality traits- extroversion and conscientiousness. The number one in importance is the personality trait of trustworthiness. There are actually the updated big 3 personality traits so far.

Trustworthiness: adj. having integrity and dependability and competence

 

Trait: n. a genetically inherited observable characteristic of an organism

Type: n. a subset

 

As you can see by the definition of trait it is really more accurate to call a personality trait a personality TYPE and not trait which is genetically determined and not conditioned behavior.

 

The updated big 3 personality TYPES are trustworthiness, extroversion, and conscientiousness.

It is also debatable whether conformity and changeability should not be added to form the updated new 5 big personality types and eliminate agreeableness and openness as valid classifications.

Humans have degrees of conformity in general and degrees of conformity to specific human behaviors such as empathy, kindness, altruism, secrecy, friendliness, helpfulness, habits, etc. Similarly humans have degrees of changeability in general and tendencies or degrees of change to specific behaviors such as habits, creativity, curiosity, morality, secrecy, honesty, friendliness, helpfulness, etc. Degree of changeability can also refer to the degree of changeability in ideas, beliefs, opinions, habits, etc. or anything which a human can do.

Thus conformity is really a subset of changeability which is a reflection of how much of a conformist you really are not subject to change. Thus you can make statements such as his degree of conformity to a belief is very large and the probability of change in that belief is very small. He tries to conform to the opinions of authority figures but the probability of change in his opinions is minimal. He conforms to the stereotype of a chronic gambler and the probability that he will change that habit is minimal baring a financial crisis.

Personality: n. 100% of the behavioral characteristics which make up a unique individual

From this definition you can see that a human personality has personality subsets or types and this is why many humans are stereotyped based on a dominant personality subset. The human has a dominant personality which is trustworthy, conscientious, extroverted, friendly, moral, creative, altruistic, and non conformist. Non dominant personality subsets are also used to describe someone’s personality and they are often inaccurate stereotypes so humans say that someone is kind, empathetic, clever, secretive, and helpful. etc. For some humans a non dominant personality subset such as helpfulness can become a dominant personality subset such as extreme altruism where you are helpful beyond the common human norms for helpful behavior.

It is more accurate to say that a human has an extroverted or friendly personality than to say that a human has a kind or helpful personality.This is because non dominant personality behaviors should usually not be thought of a personality stereotype which accurately reflects a person’s true personality as do more dominant personality subsets which represent a much larger and often more complex portion of a human’s total personality.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4200 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

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UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 847!!!

fotorcreated

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 3800 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

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UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 584!!!

FotorCreated

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 3500 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

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10 THINGS TO TRY AND AVOID ON DATES, ESPECIALLY FIRST DATES!!!

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Sincere compliments and appropriate praise for looks and opinions makes most women feel good. If you have a good job and are a good conversationalist who knows how to show interest in a woman by asking questions and listening more than speaking about yourself then this is also a good thing to do on a first date. Your strengths and some of your weaknesses will all eventually come out in follow up conversations or dates so being sincerely honest will go a long way towards establishing trust and creating possible strong bonding with the opposite sex or significant other.

If you are handsome and merely trying to deceptively score on an attractive but gullible woman then the rules are different but I won’t reveal them because I am not interested in promoting sleaze bag behavior.

Melanie Curtin is a relatively smart woman and if smarts interest you more than just looks then here are 10 things which you should try to avoid doing since they are turn offs for most smart women.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/melanie-curtin/ten-things-to-avoid-when-_b_3447210.html

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 3400 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

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21 WAYS TO BE HAPPIER FOR COMMON HUMANS NOT DRIVEN AMBITIOUS INDIVIDUALS!!!

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Ambitious driven individuals derive much happiness from loftier goal setting, taking calculated risks, and work feverishly trying to overcome the challenges on the road to hoped for success.

Common humans are more laid back, live rather mundane lives, derive happiness by being grateful for what they have, and are relatively happy with a relatively low level of achievement.

It is much easier for common humans to be happy because they have lower expectations out of life than ambitious driven individuals and the following ways generally make them happier:

They don’t hold grudges:

They don’t fester with vengeful and resentful feelings towards others who may have offended them with bad remarks or behavior. If it is not immoral behavior like lying they tend to try and forgive and forget because they view human error as imperfect behavior which can be forgiven if it does not become an annoying repeated frequent characteristic. Their general philosophy is live and let live and they don’t sink into depression, anxiety, or stress every time they get offended by someone.

They treat almost everyone with sincere kindness:

They try to treat almost everyone with love, dignity, and respect in a friendly way and increase the probability that they too will be treated the same way in return. Doing so makes them more likeable humans and having this positive attitude is a happier state than treating humans in an impersonal way.

They view problems as doable challenges and not unpleasant tasks:

A problem is viewed as a challenge with a highly probable satisfactory solution and not a drawback or a difficult struggle. They prefer solving problems with an optimistic rather than pessimistic approach.

They are grateful for what they already have:

There is a popular saying that “The happiest people don’t have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have.” Contentment is greater if you count your blessings rather than yearn for what you don’t have.

They have realistic dreams:

Many yearn or dream of celebrity status in sports, media, and acting. Happy humans have more realistic goals or dreams which they have a higher probability of achieving and don’t waste their time dreaming of the highly improbable.

They don’t get bogged down in trivial rather unimportant problems or behavior:

They are aware of and have established what the most important priorities are in their life and don’t obsess with the trivial rather unimportant things in their lives. They don’t sweat the small stuff.

They try to focus on and say nice things about humans:

Unless a human is behaving immorally they tend not to gossip and prefer to say nice things about humans instead of the bad.

They try not to make excuses for their failings in life:

If they make a mistake or fail at fulfilling a promise or task then they take full responsibility for their actions and don’t try to blame others or circumstances for their failure. They learn from their mistakes and try not to repeat them again and don’t try to justify them with an excuse which solves nothing.

They enjoy the present:

Instead of worrying about the past or future they happily live in the present and derive as much happiness from the present moment as they can.

They get enough sleep most nights:

Getting enough sleep at night means waking up fresh, being recharged, and ready to go and not being handicapped by feeling tired which hurts productivity and performance at most tasks during the day.

They don’t envy and don’t obsess with comparisons with humans with more success or greater social rank:

Comparison with others is inevitable on the conscious and subconscious level but happy humans aren’t driven by a desire to keep up with the Joneses or a desire to be better than others. Instead they celebrate or praise the achievements of others without overt envy. They are generally trying to improve themselves but don’t consider themselves failures if they don’t quite measure up to others.

They choose friends wisely:

They associate more with optimistic good moral humans with integrity and minimally expose themselves to bad humans with many flaws who have more than their share of misery in their lives.

They are more interested in pleasing themselves rather than others:

They realize that they can’t please everyone and not even most humans so they realistically try to please themselves and do what they think is morally right and maintain their integrity no matter what others may say about them.

They have adequate social skills:

Happy humans are usually not loners but derive satisfaction from having a happy family, happy friends, or a happy significant other, and radiate contagious happiness with potential new acquaintances. They are happy being by themselves but also derive happiness by being with others.

They aren’t afraid to spend some alone time:

They enjoy alone time when they daydream, think, meditate, introspect, or just relax with a favorite hobby or pastime.

They eat healthy and get enough exercise and sleep:

A healthy mind and body is essential to happiness and maintaining optimum health means eating healthy, exercising, and getting enough sleep.

They try to live simply:

Material clutter and big cars and houses can be more stressful and a greater responsibility than living a simpler life with fewer material possessions and smaller car and house. Living simply means less financial responsibility and it means that you need less money for basic needs to be met. Driven ambitious humans seldom live simply but smart common humans should to optimize happiness.

They don’t try to find happiness in bad addictive behaviors:

Some try to find happiness in bad addictive behaviors such as gambling, drugs, alcohol, gluttony, excessive shopping, pornography, and promiscuity. Truly happy humans avoid or have minimum exposure to these harmful long duration addictions.

They realize and accept that some things can’t be changed:

Instead of constantly complaining how unfair life is they realize that they can’t change most of the bad things in this life and are content with trying to improve themselves or doing the best that they can with what they have at their disposal.

They maintain their integrity:

They are basically sincerely honest and moral and do not like lying and deceiving like sociopaths do. They are respected by most humans that they interact with and if they are trustworthy, dependable, competent, friendly, and empathetic then they are also admired by many humans. They derive a feeling of great selfworth from their integrity.

They have relatively few of these 32 bad habits:

https://uldissprogis.com/2014/12/14/10-relationship-bad-habits-with-suggestions-part-1-of-3/   

https://uldissprogis.com/2014/12/15/10-relationship-bad-habits-with-suggestions-part-2-of-3/

https://uldissprogis.com/2014/12/16/12-relationship-bad-habits-with-suggestions-part-3-of-3/

 

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 3400 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

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6 IMPORTANT KEYS TO AN ATTRACTIVE PERSONALITY!!!

make-yourself-an-attractive-person1

Some humans radiate confidence and energy no matter how much money they have or how socially connected they are. Humans are attracted to them not so much because of their looks but because of the optimistic friendly ways that they interact with humans. Here are the major reasons why a personality seems so attractive and maybe even slightly irresistible.

They have integrity or are morally sound and trustworthy giving sincere honest compliments and praise when deserved and don’t lie or deceive others. They are dependable and try to fulfill any promises that they make or fulfill responsibilities which they assume.

They are good listeners and ask relevant smart follow up questions which show a genuine interest in others and make others feel respected and important. They shy away from small or trivial talk which can bore or annoy others.

They are good at reading others and treat them the way that they want to be treated. They realize that some are extroverted, love praise and attention, interaction, and public approval and that others are rather private and introverted and like to keep their lives and accomplishments largely to themselves.

They tactfully ask or make note of the likes and dislikes of a human and what they are most proud of and occasionally converse on those topics with the human making stronger emotional connections.

They recognize the difference between fact and opinion and follow an opinion with a statement that it is a personal opinion and may not be a fact which allows others to have opposing opinions without feeling that they are being harshly criticized or put down for stupidity. Sports, politics, religion, GMO’s, global warming, etc. are areas where intelligent humans can agree to disagree because most of the topics are opinions or differing beliefs and not scientifically proven facts.

They smile, look good but don’t overdo it, and are passionately optimistic with a genuine interest in life and humans despite any transient personal problems which they might have which they don’t go out of their way to advertise.

CONCLUSION: If you have integrity, are trustworthy, dependable, friendly, confident, optimistic, and competent then there is a great probability that you will be respected and even admired. An attractive or irresistible personality goes further and knows how to communicate well, read humans, and make appropriate compliments, praise, and encouragement which motivates humans to excel, do their best, and be exemplary moral citizens.

 

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 3300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

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UPDATED NEW QUOTE BY ULDIS SPROGIS 145!!!

FotorCreated

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 3000 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

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THE TRUTH ABOUT TRUSTWORTHINESS*

Trustworthiness-1rd8ygi

Trustworthiness: n. having integrity and dependability and competence

 

Trustworthiness must have integrity, dependability, and competence if it is truly trustworthy. If someone is undependable or not very competent then they can’t be trusted with responsible behavior so their trustworthiness diminishes even though they may have integrity or are honest and moral.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 1700 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!

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8 THINGS WHICH SHOULD MAKE PARTNERSHIPS OR MARRIAGES WORK BETTER!!!

partnership

Relatively unimportant misunderstandings are bound to happen in partnerships and they should frequently be for a relatively short duration. Forgive and forget the transient misunderstandings and move on to more important concerns.

You should trust your partner and if you reach a point where trust is no longer possible then consider breaking off the partnership. Being honest, sincere, dependable, competent, and friendly is vital if a relationship is to last for a long duration. If lying and irresponsibility starts to interfere with the relationship then it won’t last long if not corrected in time so that trustworthiness can continue. Trust is the vital bond which ensures a lasting relationship and without it you really don’t have a good relationship.

Learn the art of compromising and not fighting for win or lose situations all the time. Learn to give a little and get a little or give much and get much of what you really want. There will also be times when you give much and get little or get much and give little all depending on the circumstances. If you give much in one circumstance and get little maybe the next time around you will be able to get much and give only a little. If you want a female spouse to work to help much with the income then give much and learn to do the dishes, prepare a meal, do the laundry, vacuum the carpet, and spend more time with offspring.

Don’t be afraid to pursue different interests in a partnership which may separate you time wise to some extent. When you reunite then you will have many more interesting things to share and talk about and the relationship will not become that boring. Support your partner in his or her interests so you can mutually benefit from the new job or new experiences.

Don’t be afraid to reveal your weaknesses to your partner because they also have some and you should get more caring support in the areas where you are not that strong if your partner is capable of expressing empathy. If your partner has a weakness then try to help or do things to lessen the impact of that weakness.

Sometimes there are problems which are unfixable or bad childhood experiences which have made your personality less than perfect. You may be stuck with your problems and the best thing to do is to just learn to live with the problems or find ways to work around them and lessen their handicapping effects. With time you can hope to improve the situation but must realize that some problems and personality traits will probably not go away permanently.

Fights or severe arguments may erupt once in a while where there is no clear winner or loser. Don’t suffer through lasting resentment but learn to quickly forgive and forget to some extent. No relationship will last if resentment lasts long and the fight is recurrently brought up in future confrontations which should be discussions and compromises instead as much as possible.

Don’t expect your partner to read your mind or always tune in to your true emotional mood. Clearly tell what you want your partner to do and tell them if you are upset about something. If you are exhausted or angry at someone and want emotional support then tell your partner that you are exhausted or angry at someone or had a terrible day. Communicate your problems and feelings in words so that your partner does not misunderstand your true state of mind. You may get more consideration and empathy by being open and up front with your emotional and physical circumstances.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kj_-RGREIkw

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 1000 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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Enjoy!!!!!!

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THE TRUTH ABOUT REPUTATION

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Reputation: n. the degree of respect and/or disrespect possessed which is an appraisal of the degree of respect and/or disrespect made by a subset(s) of humans

Not many of us have an excellent reputation because frankly few know that you need to be honest, sincere, dependable, trustworthy, caring, and competent to have an excellent reputation. If you sometimes lie, are not dependable, and are not competent in your job or as a parent then you may get by but you will definitely not have an excellent reputation.

If you are in a leadership position then reputation is very important. If you live a rather isolated life and don’t interact with humans that frequently then your reputation may not seem that important and you will get by as long as you show up for work and don’t screw up on the job.

Reputation may not seem important to you until you develop a bad reputation and then you realize how hard it is to get it back since almost no one trusts you anymore and generally does not want to have anything to do with you.

If your reputation is very bad then your only recourse is to move to another location in the country. You can begin with a fresh new start trying to develop a good reputation which will unfortunately take some time because a good reputation is earned over a relatively long time of demonstrating trustworthiness. A good reputation is not something which you automatically get by just asking for it.

Getting a good reputation back after losing it is almost impossible so the best advice is don’t lose it in the first place and behave appropriately.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 900 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSErays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

6 SIGNS OF A SOMEWHAT RARE IDEAL MARITAL RELATIONSHIP!!!

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The relationship is emotionally very compatible and each partner pays close attention to one another and gives tender and/or strong emotional support when needed for both good events and bad ones in each other’s lives.

You have an impulsive feeling that you have found or are living with a special human in your life.

Not only sexually but just holding hands long into the relationship still gives a considerable amount of pleasure so the good chemistry is obvious.

You have been comfortable since day one with your partner and have not been afraid to reveal your vulnerabilities and share your weaknesses with your partner. Your inner world of needs and emotions is shared without fear of rejection or insecure feelings.

You have difficult challenges in life and problems to solve but you both courageously confront them head on as a team.

You have differing opinions on things but your moral foundation is shared and you are basically honest, sincere, dependable, trustworthy, faithful, and caring with each other so your basic important values are never challenged.

CONCLUSION:

The above relationship is rather rare because most males are less in touch with their emotional feelings and that of their spouses and exhibit less caring behaviors than most women. Many men are emotional illiterates and seldom detect emotional nuances. If your husband is honest, sincere, dependable, faithful, and basically trustworthy then this is usually the best which you can expect or hope for from a marital relationship. Tenderness, fondness, an abundance of caring, and responsiveness to subtle emotional cues is frequently not his forte.

Expecting your husband to sense that you had a bad day or feel unhappy from your tone of voice or facial expression is frequently asking too much. Telling him outright about your bad day and unhappiness is the smartest thing to do if you want to make sure that he knows that you have had a bad day or that you are unhappy about something.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 900 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

18 IMPORTANT TRUISMS ABOUT HUMANS!!!

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Give sincere earned compliments and praise and a close friendship grows in strength, the potential for new close friendships grows, and your good reputation grows with acquaintances too.

Exaggerated compliments and praise may con the gullible and insecure humans in the short duration but the honest human will consider you an insincere dishonest BS artist.

A good reputation which has taken years to create can be destroyed almost overnight with intentional lies, intentional deceptions, incompetence, or fraud.

Name calling, put downs, ridicule, and accusations of incompetence frequently stereotype a human unjustly causing hurt feelings and a sense that one has been attacked verbally which causes that human to think less highly of you and it damages your reputation.

Hate, resentment, jealousy, revenge, anger, and fear can make your life miserable if you obsess yourself with those emotions. If you think that other humans are your enemy then your venom will spill over into your everyday life and affect it adversely. If you can ignore or avoid bad humans then do so but don’t let their misdeeds linger in your mind for too long. If you are the victim of abuse then make plans to escape it and if you are abused on the job then make plans for a better job.

A human who listens much, accurately reads your emotions, and responds briefly with appropriate comments will appear smarter and more likeable than one who talks much about themselves and almost always tries to impose their opinions on you or show you that their point of view is always right.

Interruptions are rude unless there is an emergency or the speaker is boring you to death and can’t seem to stop talking or is doing nothing of importance.

If you don’t understand what is being communicated or what is going on or aren’t sure of an emotional state then ask some appropriate questions before reacting impulsively and frequently wrongly to a confusing situation.

When in doubt then ask more relevant questions or gather more useful information about the subject matter or situation.

If logically thinking about a problem does not seem to lead to a response which must be made quickly or urgently, then go with your impulsive feelings if you have any at the time.

If you have nothing good to say about a human then don’t say anything at all unless that human is a threat to your profit margin or someone else’s profit margin.

The best friends are honest, sincere, dependable, caring, and trustworthy. Settle for less in friendships and chances are that they will only be friends when things are going good in your life but will be unreliable disappointments when you need some help in tough times.

If you are verbally attacked for doing or saying something first make sure that you don’t deserve to be attacked for doing or saying something inappropriate or wrong. Apologize if you are at fault and only defend yourself if you are not to blame for the criticism.

Charismatic leaders are confident, honest, sincere, dependable, trustworthy, competent, caring humans. For most of us being honest, sincere, dependable, and trustworthy will go a long way at bonding successfully with others. You can always work at being more caring and competent later which will increase your confidence and personal charisma.

Identifying your bad habits is the first step towards self-improvement but what you must realize is that without personal determination, persistence, and perseverance or self-control your chances of eliminating or greatly reducing the bad habits is highly unlikely. Getting support or motivation from others to change your bad habits can sometimes greatly help if you are willing to listen to them and take their advice.

Success in life largely depends on setting small and large realistic goals which you avidly pursue with unrelenting persistence despite many setbacks. The smart human thinks about and learns from failure and frequently makes new plans or different ways of getting to the same realistic goal(s).

Stuck in an unsatisfying lifestyle? Learn new useful skills, new useful knowledge, and talk to interesting humans who don’t seem to be unsatisfied and maybe they will offer you some useful advice on how to get out of your unsatisfying lifestyle.

Create a valuable product(s) with friendly service and you will have many customers. Create a paid membership with discounts and free services and you will create many loyal customers who shop more at your establishment.

Finally if you feel abused or oppressed by the system of government then share your views with as many humans as you can openly or secretly with like minded humans if your views are being censored by the government.

 

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 900 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE,  rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

5 IMPORTANT THINGS TO IMPROVE IN YOUR LIFE!!!!!

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Improve yourself by learning new useful skills and knowledge, learning from smart humans, and learning as many useful truths or facts as you can.

Improve your relationships with others by selecting honest, sincere, dependable, trustworthy, and competent humans to be your friends and role models.

Improve your job or career by getting better at it or planning to switch to a better one.

Improve your attitude by considering each failure a learning experience, considering and savoring each success no matter how small as just one in a series of lifelong successes, and nurturing selfmotivation and selfcontrol with ongoing optimism on a daily basis if possible.

If married then improve your marriage by listening carefully, mutually caring what each other is thinking and doing, trying to avoid arguments and angry confrontations with calm discussions instead, and trying to raise educated, independent, socially competent offspring.

If you improve any or all of the above five things then you will be a winner in the game of life more than once and have more successes and happiness than most.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 800 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to twitter.com/uldissprogis.

Enjoy!!!!!!

THE TRUTH ABOUT ADVICE

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 Advice: n. giving an opinion(s) and/or fact(s) about a problem and/or circumstance frequently by someone knowledgeable and/or authoritative

You can get advice from a “professional”, a boss, spouse, offspring, family, close friend, an acquaintance, and celebrity. How do you know who to trust for good advice and on what issues?

The probability that you will get good advice is greater if the source has a reputation of being honest, sincere, dependable, trustworthy, and competent and has been so for a relatively long duration.

If you don’t have a dysfunctional family life and trust your moral spouse and have close trusting relationships with moral family members or close friends then these are the humans whom you can consult for relationship advice the most. Chances are they will be honest with you and try to tell it like it is from their point of view and none of them should be from dysfunctional families themselves.

In this growing hedonistic culture with armies of dysfunctional human relationships even professional therapists are frequently not a good source of relationship advice because many have a myopic philosophy of -do what you like and with whomever you like and come back for more advice at a fee.

Very few will be honestly blunt with you and insist that moral behavior is paramount in any great relationship and that requires honesty, sincerity, dependability, trustworthiness, empathy, emotional support, and an ability to communicate well with a minimum of confrontations, arguments, intense criticisms, and name calling.

Professional advice is also sometimes suspect these days because many doctors are dispensing artificial sometimes addictive drugs with serious metabolic side effects which you shouldn’t be taking. Instead they should more frequently be recommending changing to a healthier lifestyle of eating more organic food, getting moderate exercise, and letting the body heal naturally which sometimes may take from a week to a month. Quick fix pills are frequently prescribed to mask symptoms and not cure the cause of the problem.

Many top lawyers represent the wealthy and the relatively inexperienced ones representing the poor are frequently looking for deep pockets to sue.

Stock brokers, media stock advisers, mutual funds, hedge funds can’t be trusted in the long duration because of a volatile rigged stock market favoring big money investments.

Politicians can’t be trusted to eliminate special interest laws favoring big money interests and balance the budget the way the rest of us are expected to do.

Advertisers of many beauty products, weight loss systems, food supplements, energy and mental boosters all deceive the public into thinking instant results are possible when in fact they are miracle promises or advice not based on any verifiable facts for large groups or populations of humans.

Whether it is an individual or organization, if you want decent advise then go with the trustworthy ones who have been trustworthy for a relatively long duration for best results. There is no guarantee of good advice in life because even the trustworthy ones sometimes believe in the deceptions, myths, and lies of others who are in fact not deserving of trust.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, approximately 700 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

Enjoy!!!!!!

THE TRUTH ABOUT ADMIRATION

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Admiration: n. respecting and being attracted to and feeling a relatively large intensity pleasure because of (good and/or moral behavior) and/or professional excellence

We generally admire competent professionals who know what they are doing and provide us with a needed service. We also admire humans who are honest, sincere, dependable, trustworthy, friendly, considerate, and interesting to talk to.

If you want to be admired in life by others then you have to acquire the knowledge and skills to have a successful career or become a leader with excellent social skills and some expertise in the field that you are a leader of. As an admired leader who is respected by others you will have to be highly moral with a very good memory for names and that means not lying, stealing, or being adulterous if married.

Yes, some wealthy individuals are admired for their wealth alone and they may have done some pretty immoral things along the way to acquiring that wealth. However, chances are that you would not want to have them as a personal friend because you may not respect them for their immorality. You may admire their wealth but not respect them as good humans.

Tyrants are admired by many humans because they are powerful humans and they in some way usually benefit from the exercise of that power. Historically conquering tyrants were both feared and respected for their ability to expand territory through violent means. Many more fear opposing tyrants with negative comments or actions because of a fear of incarceration or even death.

A moral leadership is respected and admired by its citizens and immoral leadership corrupted by power and money is not truly respected by humans and frequently leads to tyranny which is the only solution to the chaos created by immorality.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, approximately 700 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

Enjoy!!!!!!

THE TRUTH ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS

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Relationships with offspring, spouse, close friends, friends, and casual acquaintances all require a slightly different skill set.

If you are honest, sincere, dependable, competent, and in effect moral and trustworthy then you should be respected and even admired by close relationships and the chances are good that you will also have good relationships with them.

Be immoral by lying and deceiving much, be unreliable, be incompetent and generally untrustworthy and you will have bad friends if you have any at all.

To improve relationships further it helps to be a good listener and conversationalist who can relate to and understands different humans and social classes. It helps if you have a good education and are interested in more things than just your job or family so that you have interesting things to talk about with other humans, especially if those interests correspond to their interests. If you have similar interests then you will improve your chances of a good two way conversation.

If you can read the emotional state of the human that you are relating to then you will be far more successful in communicating without unnecessary arguments, confrontations, and disagreements. Conflict where one side is trying to win at all costs should be avoided if possible if you want to maintain a good relationship.

Relationships need time, energy, and frequently money to maintain or even improve them so make sure that you allocate most of your time, energy, and money to the most important human relationships in your life.

Job or career relationships come first and family second unless there is a crisis situation in the family. Social contacts beyond job or family can be important if you are in sales or a leader in an organization which is looking for new customers or new members.


Remember, if you want interesting good relationships then you have to be interesting yourself and good too. If you are poor, badly educated, and unemployed then don’t expect your best friends to be rich, educated, and fun to be with!!!!!!

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, approximately 700 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

Enjoy!!!!!!

 

THE TRUTH ABOUT DEPENDABILITY

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Dependability: n. trustworthiness and reliability

Dependability for humans basically means showing up on time after promising to do so, doing what you promised to do on time, and not lying to other humans.

 

If you are trustworthy and reliable then you are dependable and that is a very desirable moral characteristic to have in your personality for successful interactions with other humans. Your boss, coworkers, spouse, significant other, close friends, and other humans will probably respect and admire you because they can trust you and rely on you knowing that you are not unpredictable and will keep them guessing what you will do next.

 

THE TRUTH ABOUT RELIABILITY

 

Reliability means that you are highly predictable in your behavior and it doesn’t change in random ways always keeping a human guessing what you will do next.

 

 

Reliability also means a car, appliance, or other product which works well without glitches while it lasts and many think that reliability also means durability which means that the product lasts a long time without breaking down.

 

Someone who shows up to work on time and knows how to do the job well is an individual who is greatly sought after by all businesses and it is a sign of reliability. If you are also dependable then you probably will be respected and admired by your boss and coworkers because they will trust you fully.

 

Reliable: adj. expecting a subset(s) to achieve a goal(s) with no change for a relatively long duration

 

 

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, approximately 700 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

Enjoy!!!!!!

11 SIGNS OF A BAD RELATIONSHIP

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You sense that you will have to change too much to make your partner happy.

You are finding that making yourself a mirror image of your partner’s activities, opinions, and beliefs is the only thing which seems to make your partner happy.

If none of your family members approve of your partner then it is an indication that he or she will clash with your fundamental values latter in the relationship and you will probably eventually be unhappy with the relationship too.

You can’t trust your partner to be alone and are always suspicious of what they may be up to that you don’t approve of. You basically don’t have an honest, sincere, and reliable or trustworthy relationship.

If your partner is censoring all your relationships with others and gives you little freedom to make your own decisions then you may have entered a tyrannical relationship and it is even worse if they try to control what you do or say.

You can’t seem to get a good balance for “me” and “we” time.

Your partner is always chronically unemployed.

Your partner has a serious addiction or compulsive bad habit such as compulsive shopping, gambling, pornography, alcoholism, drug abuse, lying, or is promiscuous.

You argue frequently and even fight about both unimportant and important things and almost never seem to resolve, solve, or compromise on any of the things which you argue about.

You are sexually incompatible.

Your partner has mostly bad friends or a bad family which you intensely dislike.

 

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, approximately 600 so far, and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

Enjoy!!!!!!

4 MAJOR THINGS WHICH MAKE YOUR RELATIONSHIP BETTER WITH 30 DETAILS!!!

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YOU KNOW MANY INTIMATE DETAILS ABOUT YOUR PARTNER

You can name one or more of your partner’s FAVORITE books, songs, childhood pets, food, TV programs, celebrities, athletes, politicians, relatives, childhood friends, etc.

You know your partner’s best friend and know the friend’s best and worst qualities or characteristics.

You know your partner’s goals and/or aspirations in life,

the most embarrassing moment in childhood,

the proudest moment in childhood and adulthood,

and the characteristics and/or personality traits gotten from parents.

If you have offspring then you know what personality traits your partner has passed on to the offspring,

you know your partner’s flaws in detail and you don’t use stereotypic descriptions.

YOU NURTURE YOUR PARTNER’S GOOD GOALS AND INTERESTS

You support your partner’s good ideas and dreams,

frequently when you disagree you acknowledge the sensible points,

you offer praise or are enthusiastic when something good happens to your partner,

you mutually remember and relive major moments of happiness such as great vacations or important happy family events,

you remember new and mutually challenging moments in life,

when you argue you care about your partner’s feelings and opinions and don’t resort to name calling and profanities.

YOU MUTUALLY CARE ABOUT ONE ANOTHER

Your partner basically cares about you or tries to nurture or support you and tries to protect you from bad influences and bad humans.

You frequently express appreciation and admiration for one another,

you feel that you are teammates working towards common goals,

you are physically affectionate with each other and especially in the morning before departing to work,

your partner reacts kindly to your traumatic or fearful moments,

you don’t refuse to talk about important topics that your partner cares about, you care about your partner’s relationships with family, friends, acquaintances, boss, coworkers and respect them,

you have mutual fun together,

you value many of your partner’s suggestions and are willing to try them out, you enjoy spending time together,

when you are stressed or upset you can go to your partner for emotional support,  

you rarely condemn, show contempt, hatred,  cuss, or use a stereotypic name such as crazy or stupid,

you know that if you have something important to say then your partner will listen to you attentively,

and you have your own personal love gestures, signs, or affectionate words.

YOU HAVE A TRUSTWORTHY RELATIONSHIP

You are confident that your partner won’t cheat on you or jeopardize your financial security.

Your partner is honest, sincere, and reliable.

If your partner lies then hopefully it is because there is fear that feelings will be hurt and it is mostly white lies about relatively unimportant things since your partner probably hasn’t learned to be diplomatically honest when it comes to comments about a substandard gift, new clothing, or the quality of a homemade meal.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them and one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially COMMON SENSE.

To read a list and access any of my approximately 400 evergreen truth blogs follow me at twitter.com/uldissprogis and I am sure that you will find more than a handful of evergreen truth blogs which will interest you.

Enjoy!!!!!!

3 DOMINANT REASONS WHY OFFSPRING AND ADULTS SOMETIMES LIE AND/OR DECEIVE

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 1.     Humans lie and deceive for personal benefit and/or to benefit or to hurt others.

Rarely does a human lie to hurt themselves which is a form of masochism or a desperate attempt to get pity or sympathy from others and hopefully gain personally by manipulating another’s emotions. Beggars are sometimes real life examples of humans manipulating human emotions for personal benefit.

 2.     If a human is a member of a group then they may lie and deceive for mutual benefit. Doctors frequently deceive or do not report on the bad medical practices of their coworkers or fellow doctors and the result is hurting their profession as a whole.

 3.     Language with its one word emotional generalized descriptions is structured to make lying and deception inevitable and frequently unintentional.

 

Lying for personal benefit may be to maintain a good personal reputation or trying to hide an embarrassing, wrong, or immoral personal action which frequently deserves punishment. Lying about another human is sometimes done to maintain that human’s personal reputation for doing something embarrassing, wrong, or immoral which frequently deserves punishment.

 

Lying for personal benefit to be praised and/or rewarded for something they personally did not do which may hurt another who deserves the praise and/or reward.

 

Lying and deceiving may be done to hurt another’s reputation or to get praise, a reward, or a material possession from another which is frequently done for personal gain or vindictiveness at the expense of another.

 

Humans sometimes lie and deceive for personal short duration protection or benefit which they also erroneously hope will be long duration protection or benefit. Humans lie and deceive to protect, benefit, or hurt others. 

 

Language structure lies and deceives. Language is structured to give yes or no, love or hate, like or dislike, approve or disapprove, beautiful or ugly answers to questions but reality is frequently much different and there are seldom absolutes or generalities which convey the whole truth. Saying that a human is stupid is frequently a lie because that human does not do stupid things all the time.

 

You may love something about a gift but hate some aspect of it, you may think a dress has the potential to be beautiful if only it did not have one or two ugly features, and you may want to answer that it is yes most of the time but that there are exceptions to the rule and the answer is sometimes no.

 

An archaic language forces us to lie because of its absolute or general concepts and that is why prejudice prevails because stereotypes of ethnic and political groups are made which are seldom true in all cases for all members of an ethnic or political group. Blacks are lazy and Jews are stingy, Republicans are conservative and Democrats are liberal is the kind of bias which language structure is mostly to blame because of its tendency towards absolute or general one word emotional descriptions.

Offspring frequently try to lie to avoid punishment or condemnation for doing something bad, wrong, or immoral. If offspring hit their sibling or another offspring or steal some toy from a sibling or neighborhood offspring then they may lie to try and maintain a good reputation with their parents and avoid deserved punishment.

Adults are just like offspring and sometimes lie to maintain their reputation and avoid condemnation by others for doing something bad, wrong, or immoral. More frequently adults lie and deceive to get rewards and material benefits from others which they would not be able to do if they told the truth or behaved in trustworthy ways.

 

CONCLUSION:

Lying and deception are programmed into language usage and it is a struggle trying to use it logically in an unbiased non deceptive way. If you consciously or intentionally lie and deceive it is just a question of time before your lies and deceptions are revealed and your reputation will hit the toilet.

Trustworthiness is a history of being honest, sincere, and telling the truth reliably and that means that if you want an excellent social reputation and want to become a trustworthy leader someday then you should never intentionally lie or deceive.

Personal relationships with other humans, especially family and close friendships will also suffer if you intentionally lie or deceive.

Humans lie and deceive to get rewards that they don’t deserve and to avoid punishment because nature tries to be efficient and lying and deception sometimes seems to be the most efficient way of getting what you want or need, especially if you don’t feel that you will be caught in your lies and deceptions.

Deception is really a hidden lie which language promotes with its irrational, illogical, emotionally biased structure.

 

If you liked this evergreen blog then read more of them and one or more of my evergreen books, especially COMMON SENSE.

Enjoy!!!!!!

TRUSTWORTHINESS CAN ONLY GROW OUT OF TRUE HONESTY AND SINCERITY

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You can initially trust a human who may not be trustworthy because they have to prove that they deserve trust through actions which means that they should also be competent, reliable, and/or don’t steal in the area of trust in which they should have expertise.

You can have a seemingly honest and sincere human who isn’t very competent or reliable in a job or career and is someone who is not trustworthy and someone whom you would not want to be in a position of authority.

An unreliable human is frequently one who makes a promise and does not fulfill it. This is a form of lying about the future of one’s potential performance and the human is not really being honest with you. Yes, there are unforeseen future events which can make a promise null and void realistically but a frequent history of unreliability or not fulfilling promises makes one untrustworthy and effectively a compulsive liar.

Can you trust an incompetent mechanic? No, and if a mechanic promises to fix your car and can’t then they are lying about their competence and you can’t trust the mechanic.

If a politician promises to fix the economy and fails to do so they are lying to you and even if they are incompetent and unreliable they should know of this incompetence and unreliability and they are effectively lying to you and are untrustworthy and not deserving of your trust.

Being honest or not lying is the most important human characteristic and if that human is incompetent and unreliable then they are lying to you with untrue promises about their competency and reliability then they are not really being truly honest with you.

Is a new relationship, personal or business, going to be a trustworthy one? Only time will tell unless you have trustworthy humans who claim that the human has a history of trustworthiness. Then you can start trusting them with some degree of reliability.

If you liked this evergreen blog read more of them and read one or more of my evergreen books, especially COMMON SENSE.

Enjoy!!!!!!