Monthly Archives: December 2017



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The purpose of this video is to present and try to explain a new definition for love which can be considered to be three dimensional or having 3 basic parts which exist together simultaneously or exist together all at once. The three parts exist together in any love experience or love behavior.

Briefly the three basic parts to any love experience is SENSING A VERY INTENSE PLEASURE during the experience, CARING about the experience, and DESIRING the experience. We are talking here about the LOVE experience.

Let’s first explain what we mean by “sensing a very intense pleasure”.

The full definition for pleasure is-

Pleasure: n. sensing a sensation which the brain subjectively judges to be good and is what most people desire to experience in various degrees of intensity

So we are saying that pleasure is a feeling and it is basically experiencing something which FEELS GOOD. When we say very intense pleasure then we are really saying it is something which feels VERY GOOD or EXTREMELY GOOD.

There is a danger here in using the word good because good is a value judgment and a drug high may be a very intense pleasure but it is not a very good pleasure. Drug highs can be very addictive and cause bad circumstances or situations in the long duration. A drug high is really a very bad feeling or pleasure in the long duration and many can cause severe unpleasant withdrawal symptoms such as withdrawal symptoms caused by heroin.

The full definition for intense is-

Intense: adj. impacting a unit area per unit time with a quantity of energy and/or matter

Intensity is used here to suggest the reality that intensity is similar to energy impacting or hitting the brain at a great rate thus exciting the brain. So we can in another way say that intense pleasure is excited pleasure. When we say very intense then we are really saying very excited. So very excited pleasure is very intense pleasure.

Love is a very intense feeling and a feeling by itself is much less intense. Two examples of feelings are affection for and liking something. Love is not an affection. Love is not liking. Both affection for and liking are merely feelings and not as intense as love. Many humans confuse feelings with love and make the mistake of saying that affection and liking are examples of a LITTLE love and this is just not true. That would be saying that affection and liking are examples of a little very intense pleasure. What does a little very intense pleasure really mean? It’s nonsense.

From the standpoint of feelings, when we talk about love we are not talking here about good feelings but about very good or extremely good feelings and only the extremely good feelings can be called love. Historically love has been called a strong feeling so we could inaccurately say the love is a very strong feeling. Strong is not intense.  Love is really a very intense feeling or pleasure.

We are really talking here about the degree of pleasure and love is a high or large degree of pleasure. If we say very intense pleasure or extremely good pleasure or extremely good feelings then we are talking about the same thing only my definition of very intense pleasure is more accurate than just saying extremely good feelings. Good is not intense and is a value judgement.

The first part or dimension of love is the emotional part which can be described as “sensing very intense pleasure”. When you are having a very intense emotional experience for a short or sometimes even long time then you can say that you are experiencing or sensing very intense pleasure or love. A loving experience can be very short in time or it can be experienced for longer periods of time than just a few seconds or minutes. That is why it is more accurate to say sensing very intense pleasure for a short and/or long duration.

Time is a very important concept in the definition and understanding of love since no normal human is capable of experiencing very intense pleasure ALL the time unless they are mentally ill or are continuously being fed mentally stimulating drugs. Very intense normal excited experiences come and go during the day in general living.

Love has a frequency of occurrence such as none a day, once a day, three times a day, etc. You can say that I experienced no love today, I experienced love three times today, and I experienced love 23 times this month.

Wow! I look and love that new sports car, Out of sight! I love how she looks in her new outfit, or that was a fantastic touchdown. I loved it! I loved the sex and orgasm! These are all examples of relatively short intense emotional love experiences.

An intense or relatively elevated emotional feeling can sometimes last for a few weeks or even a few months such as during an infatuation with the opposite sex. I loved to talk to her, loved to think about her, loved to interact with her, loved how she looked and much of my life during the infatuation time period revolved around her exclusively. Yes, even during an infatuation time period the love is not always of great intensity because we have to take time out to sleep, work, eat, go to the bathroom, and maybe even exercise a little. So everything that you do during the infatuation time period is not intense emotional love but has periods of emotional calm also when you are NOT sensing very intense pleasure.

The love experience does not vary in degree such as a small degree of love which is really just liking. Liking is not low intensity love but just low intensity pleasure. Medium intensity pleasure which is affection is also not very intense pleasure or love.

This is why love is so confusing a concept for most humans because there is really no such thing as a little love or low intensity love. When you say that you are getting only a little love you really are saying and meaning that the frequency of the love which you are getting is low. I only get love once a month is very low frequency love which is often confused as little love.

For example- You frequently didn’t love me today compared to yesterday. We only had sex once today and yesterday it was three times. You loved me more frequently yesterday. Thus loving experiences can happen zero times a day, one to ten or more times a day and all of them are separated from each other with periods of relative calm or relaxation or low intensity pleasure and maybe some unpleasant experiences thrown inbetween the loving experiences.

When you have an orgasm, or are informed that you have landed the job of your dreams then you sense very intense pleasure for a relatively short time. You can also sense very intense pleasure saying “right on to yourself” when you hear that a human that you hated on the job just got fired. Emotionally you love the new news of that firing event.

Let’s use a concrete example to explain the next two parts of love by using sexual intercourse. Yes, some women don’t enjoy sexual intercourse for many possible reasons but males generally get very intense pleasure from the sex experience which usually results in a climax or ejaculation.

We have established the fact that sexual intercourse is very intense pleasure for males and further most males CARE about the experience or want to nurture and protect it which is what caring is all about. We nurture the loving experience by trying to make it better which means trying different sex positions other than the missionary position where the male is on top and the female is on the bottom. We may nurture sex by arousing the female with loving words and behavior which the female enjoys. There are probably many more ways sex can be nurtured to make the overall experience more pleasurable or at least relatively constant from one sexual experience to the next.

Caring also means protecting the love experience so we may choose to marry the female to get exclusive sexual rights from her and ensure that she is protected from having sexual intercourse with others. Closing the door so that others do not observe the sexual act is a way of protecting the sexual experience from interruption. We also protect or care by not being too rough during sex and injuring the female in the process.

Since caring is often thought of as a behavior and not an emotion it is often falsely separated or omitted from the definition of love. We really care while we are having sex but it is not intuitively obvious to an impartial observer who may not have analyzed what caring or the nurturing and protective behaviors are during the sexual experience.

The last part of love is a DESIRE for the love experience. We desire to possess and/or interact with and/or experience the sexual intercourse in the short and/or long duration. There is an observation by some scientists that sex is on the young adult male mind on a daily basis and this leads to addictive pornography and masturbation for some males who don’t have regular sexual partners or females. There is definitely a desire for sex in the male mind and this is one of the main reasons why so many young males have a tendency to be promiscuous since they fear the financial responsibility of marriage and offspring rearing.

When we start sexual intercourse there is a desire to want to continue it to it’s conclusion. The desire exists while we are doing the love act or experience.

We have established the fact that there is very intense pleasure, caring for, and desire in sexual intercourse for males and the three exist in the male brain simultaneously or at the same time.

So a loving moment here has three parts- the very intense pleasure part, the caring part, and the desire part all working in the brain at the same time or simultaneously and it lasts for a short and/or long duration.

It could now be asked- is an affectional display for your spouse love or an act of love? The answer is no. Affection for your spouse is not a very intense pleasure but a medium intensity pleasure so it can’t be called love or an act of love even though affection is a bonding behavior and often brings two interacting humans close or closer together, especially in a marriage.

It is a fact of life that affectionate behavior and liking behavior towards our spouse exists in a marriage loving relationship. These are not loving behaviors contrary to the old notion of love where any affectionate or liking display was considered love or loving one’s spouse. There is frankly no very intense pleasure in affectionate and liking behaviors but rather medium and low intensity pleasure.

We can thus call “being in love” or a loving relationship- loving, affection, and liking but not simultaneously or not at the same time. We sometimes love, we sometimes are affectionate, and we sometimes like what we do in an ongoing loving relationship with our spouse.

Now you can ask what happens to a loving relationship when the very intense pleasure of love begins to subside such as in old age when sex stops. The relationship can continue due to a good habit which means that there is still some affection and liking going on which continues to bond two humans together. A desire to commit to and continue the commitment in a relationship is also what keeps the marriage together and you can consider it a form of loyalty.

It seems obvious that love is possible between two humans but some don’t believe that love is possible with an object. What does- I love my sports car really mean? There is the obvious love reaction when first buying the car which is a very intense pleasure that we experience. Then there is the very intense pleasure that we get driving it such as accelerating past another car, driving fast, maybe changing lanes to pass other cars, and negotiating fast turns or sharp curves in the road.

We care for our car because we protect it by driving safely to avoid accidents and we desire to drive it to get to our destination in the fastest time possible. Males especially love their car at first, care for it by maintaining it and driving safely, and finally desire to drive it when they go somewhere. Some males also take pride in their car since they consider it a female magnet when they are single.

Many males desire to possess a car, interact with it, and experience driving it for short and/or long durations. Yes, many males don’t love driving and obeying all the traffic rules but some go to race tracks and obstacle courses where they love to drive fast and negotiate dangerous obstacles.

Not all women love shopping but the ones that do get very intense pleasure from shopping, especially when they find something beautiful or eye catching. They care for shopping by nurturing it with conversations about it with other women and by trying to get the best deal. They also desire to shop when they have enough money in the bank and some are compulsive shoppers and desire to shop even when they can’t afford it.

Very few love to drive and shop ALL the time but there are usually parts of driving and shopping which many love. Both driving and shopping are often necessities and most of us drive and shop to survive in the modern world.


Almost all of us love objects and/or subjects in our lives and we experience very intense pleasure from them for a short and/or long duration. It is a fact of life that our love for things or subsets often fades with the passage of time but most of us continue to love something at some point for duration during an entire lifespan.

Humans are very different in many ways and every individual loves different things in his or her personal way. The real key to life is learning to love the right things or learning to love the right objects and/or subjects and/or subsets which fit your abilities, personality, and mindset.

Finally the full new definition for love is-

Love: v. to sense a very intense pleasure for a subset(s) one cares about and the behaviors which exist with it and frequently desiring to (possess and/or interact with) and/or experience samer subset(s) for a short and/or long duration


If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


If you have never done an intensive self analysis of yourself then this is an opportunity for you to find out who you really are as a human and what may be some of your future goals in life. Enjoy!!!

Who or what inspired you the most? Why?

What would you ask someone whom you would like to meet?

What qualities do you like in a human that you admire?

What qualities or characteristics do you admire in others?

What would you like to change about your personality?

What short and long term goals do you have in life?

Am I always trying to improve myself?

What would you have to do to call your life a success?

What practical skill do you wish you had?

What don’t you have enough talent for?

If you had a chance to start over then what would you do differently?

If you had more than enough money then what would you do?

What would you like to accomplish in a year, 5 years, 10 years from now?

What would you regret not doing if your life stopped today?

What is your ideal day?

How do you like to relax?

What are you most proud of?

What are you most afraid of?

What are your good habits?

What are your bad habits?

What is your favorite book, movie, or song and why?

What excites you?

What do you love?

What do you hate?

What is my happiest memory?

What do I strongly believe?

What do I like and dislike about my job?

Do I want to advance in my job with the same company?

Am I more introverted or extroverted?

Do I budget my money and am financially responsible?

Do you have integrity?

Are you trustworthy?

Are you dependable?

Are you competent?

Are you friendly?

Are you empathetic?

Are you ambitious?

Are you courageous?

Are you adventurous?

How do you want to be remembered in life?

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


Prioritize and list the humans that you need and want to spend the most time with.

Categorize your human contacts as close friends, important and unimportant job related friends, casual friends, and acquaintances.

Interact with important friends more frequently or spend more time, energy, effort, and money on them.

Network or try to bond with humans who potentially could further your present or future career or job.

Take a chance or spend some time on new friends that interest you or are useful to you.

Try to associate more with humans or friends who motivate you to improve.

Maintain contact with humans who are progressing in life.

For close friends choose the ones with integrity who are moral and honest, dependable, competent, and somewhat ambitious and motivating. You must also have these traits if you want to attract quality friends.

To have a friend you must be a friend, help out where appropriate, and be interesting to talk to. You will probably connect more readily with humans who are close to your age, have the same educational level, and have some mutual or common interests in life.

Avoid or exclude bad or useless time wasting friends from your life.

Many humans will enter and leave your life throughout a lifetime. Don’t be afraid to leave or minimize contact with old friends and don’t be afraid to try to make new and perhaps better friends or contacts.

Continue to selfeducate yourself, broaden your interests, and improve yourself because ultimately humans want someone interesting to interact with too.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!



Opinion: n. communicating a relatively weak transient belief which is subject to change if confronted by (logical reasoning and/or experiences) and/or respected authority figures which nullify samer belief

Persuasion: n. getting agreement that a goal(s) is worth achieving

Before you try to change someone’s opinion it is best to stop and ask yourself three basic questions-

Is the human important enough in my life?

Is the opinion that I want to change going to benefit me and/or the another human in some way?

Is the opinion important enough in my life to spend my time, energy, effort, and maybe even money trying to change the opinion?

If the answer to the three questions is yes then go ahead and try to change the opinion.

If the answer is no then you are wasting your time, energy, effort, and maybe even money trying to change an opinion which should be left alone in the first place.

Persuasion is called an art because humans are different and what may persuade one human may not persuade another even if you use all the recommended persuasive tactics or tricks suggested by others.

There are general principles of persuasion which optimize the probability of success in changing another’s opinion but it is not a sure thing so my suggestions are merely ballpark approximations to what should be done to change someones’s opinion.

In general you will be more persuasive if you are


respected as an authority figure,

use factual or real examples to support your opinion, and

customize your opinions to the real life experiences and feelings of the human that you are trying to persuade.

Changing someone’s opinion is easier than changing someone’s basic beliefs but it is always easier to do if there is some personal benefit which can come from a change in opinion. If your persuasion will lead to someone saving time, energy, and money and even feeling happy about the change then it could be a worthwhile persuasion.

Try to change an opinion if you come from a position of authority or respect and are either known to have expertise on the subject or have a relatively close trusting relationship with the person whom you are trying to persuade.

Historical precedents are important because if something has worked before or is working well now then chances are frequently pretty good that it will work in the future too. Also appeal to experts or testimonials if you want to back up your persuasive powers with influential humans who have the same opinion.

Personality types will also affect your persuasive ability and it might be wise to determine whether a human is very dogmatically inclined on a subject or is malleable and open to differing views on the subject. If you feel there is a great emotional investment or emotional attachment then opposing that opinion may only lead to an argument or a strong denial.

Not so obvious is that it is very important WHOM you are trying to persuade. Is it your boss, employee, customer, friend, date, spouse, offspring, stranger, team, or audience whom you are trying to persuade?

Business persuasion is very different than trying to impress or persuade your date what a good potential mate you will be and persuading an audience has its own unique skill set. Google and find out what are the unique ways of persuading each category of humans. You will only find general principles covered in this blog.

Unless it is a close friend or spouse generally stay away from attempts to change a religious, political, or sports opinion which can quickly escalate into an undesirable argument and standoff.

WHAT you are trying to persuade a human of is also very important. There are factual persuasions and very subjective personal persuasions about politics, religion, sports odds, and aesthetics which are very frequently excursions into futility because the highly emotional beliefs or opinions are so strong and seldom subject to change or persuasion. Sometimes facts or statistics are coupled with strong emotional biases or feelings about what the facts really mean and a strictly logical approach to try and persuade may not be sufficient to reach a persuasive agreement.

If changing an opinion may result in an immediate or future pay increase then persuasion can lead to good personal benefits and should be pursued.

For an overloaded working mom it can be beneficial to try and persuade the husband to get more involved in doing household chores and share the burden or responsibility. The husband may have an opinion that cleaning the house and cooking is women’s work so she will probably have to come up with a lot of convincing examples of working couples sharing the household workload.

Janitor men clean and men chefs cook so you can argue that cleaning and cooking is not just women’s work. Yes, historically stay at home moms took care of the house and offspring but times have changed so mutual effort is now the smart thing to do.

Trying to change human opinions as a public speaker is much harder than changing a one on one opinion where you can get immediate feedback from the one that you are trying to persuade or convince. Public speaking is persuading from a distance and that requires additional skills which don’t have to be used in one on one persuading which entails a lot of questioning, feedback, and two way discussion in general.

In one on one persuasion it is very important to do most of the listening and only short and sweet head nods and brief responses showing respect for the others opinions. Using phrases such as “I know where you are coming from” and “That makes a lot of sense” shows a respect for another’s opinions.

Asking probing questions to determine all the pros and cons of the situation and probing for possible objections to your point of view are also important because they will have to be addressed and in doing so you may uncover some flaws in your point of view which will need attention or change. There is seldom a perfect opinion and yours may have some flaws too which you should admit to and hopefully correct.

Try not to be overly confident, aggressive, and don’t proselytize with a basic viewpoint that you are a know it all. This will automatically put the listener in a defensive mode with a tendency to disagree or say no to whatever you may have to say. Try to stay calmly in discussion mode and not in intense argument or debate mode.

Sometimes partial agreement is better than no agreement at all. We are really talking about the art of compromising here so there is a win win situation for both even though one or both parties don’t get everything that they wanted. Sometimes it is even smart to agree to disagree and leave the issue unresolved for the time being.

Use statistical consensus if it exists in what you are trying to persuade because many people are motivated by the herd instinct and want to frequently be in the majority with their opinions. This approach can be dangerous with teenagers since peer pressure is a statistical consensus or what the majority is doing. If the majority is using drugs of some kind then this does not mean that you should be doing it also.

Very briefly,

if someone likes you,

if you are an expert or authority figure,

if you do them a favor first,

if many have been persuaded already,

if they have made a commitment, and

if scarcity is emphasized then you are more likely to persuade successfully, especially if you are trying to persuade someone into buying something.


Before trying to persuade someone you have to assess

who you want to persuade,

about what,

how you will persuade, and

when you will attempt persuasion.


Whom do you want to persuade?

If you are in a position of authority over someone then you will have more success in persuading that person. If you are the boss with expertise then you may be very persuasive about job related issues but not necessarily in topics or opinions outside the job sphere.

If you are a parent authority figure then you will have a greater probability of persuading your offspring even though realistically you may occasionally have to use some coercion or the threat of punishment to get them to do what you want.

If you have expertise in a field or are in a position of authority then your relevant opinions will be more respected and your persuasive powers will be greater.

You will probably also be better able to persuade your spouse or close friend with whom you have an honest, sincere, and trusting relationship. Close associates who may admire and respect you will usually be more persuaded by you than if you try to persuade total strangers or casual friends.

If you use authority figure opinions or statistics which show that most humans believe or behave a certain way then you will be more persuasive because most humans generally respect authority and want to be accepted as part of the majority or don’t want to seem like loners.


What do you want to persuade about?

You must also realize that persuading one to change a strong religious, political, or sports belief or a strong opinion will be almost impossible and not worth the effort. It is much different if you are trying to persuade someone to buy information, goods, or services from you where a human may actually have a desire, need, want, or interest in what you are selling or offering.

Persuading your spouse to do something at home like taking out the garbage out on a regular basis, spending more time with offspring, or doing you a big favor is possible but you may have to do something in return to be persuasive enough.

If you are trying to persuade someone then assess whether the persuasion will lead to mutual benefit in some way. If you can demonstrate that you gain something more than just a boost to your ego and the human whom you are trying to persuade will gain something good by being persuaded then the probability of being persuasive goes up greatly.

Before you begin to persuade first ask whether there will be any benefits for one party or both if the persuasion is successful or goes through.


How will you persuade?

If you compliment or boost someone’s ego and make them emotionally feel good first then you will often have more success with your persuasive attempts.

If you first probe the possible responses or opinions of the one whom you are trying to persuade and listen carefully to what they have to say, then you may put yourself in a better strategic position and be able to fine tune your persuasive attempts to the needs, desires, and wants of the human. After listening carefully to the initial responses or opinions you may decide that persuasion may be a waste of time.

If you are confident, enthusiastic, and communicate clearly and understandably then you will be more persuasive.

If you use real life examples in the human’s life or your own to try and prove your point then you will be more successful in persuading. If you can relay an interesting story which backs up your point of view then you will be more convincing in your persuasive attempts.

If you have documented facts then you will sometimes be more persuasive.

If you have thoroughly analyzed a problem or problems with the pros and cons and have plausible solutions to them backed up by facts then you should be more persuasive.

If you can demonstrate or show that something bad or terrible will happen if the human is not persuaded then you may be a more successful persuader.

Remember that threatening someone into doing something rather than persuading them will get results if you are in a position of authority but the human adult whom you are threatening into doing something may not be persuaded that it was the right thing to do and may resent your coercive action and their respect for you may decrease.


When should you persuade?

It should be obvious that if you are trying to persuade a human and they are too tired or too busy then you will have to pick another time to try and persuade. Also persuasion sometimes requires persistence and you may have to frequently try to persuade sometimes using a slightly different approach each time and the time that it may take before being successful may be a week, month, or even a year.

If there is a sense of urgency created in the one that you are trying to persuade then they are more likely to respond more quickly and affirmatively and this applies more to selling something to someone.


Here is an attempt at changing your teenager’s opinion that marijuana usage is not a big thing since so many humans are into it and has become legal in Colorado.

Ask some probing questions first.

Do you think a person has the right to do with his body whatever he or she wishes including drugs?

Do you think marijuana is habit forming for some?

Do you think regular marijuana usage does not affect job performance or thinking? (back this up with factual research)

Do you think that marijuana usage and excessive alcohol usage simultaneously will cause greater driving impairment?

Do you think minors should be able to use marijuana?

Do you think parents who use marijuana a lot will be bad role models for their offspring?

Do you know that excessive marijuana usage by minors results in psychological problems and bad performance in school? (back this up with factual research)

Would you let your 4 year old smoke marijuana? Why not?

Is marijuana a gateway to more addictive drugs? (not an established fact but a more probable yes)

Sometimes black market marijuana is laced with shitty chemicals to get you coming back for more or you can’t trust the quality of it and are sometimes playing Russian roulette with your brain.

Do you know that about 10 percent of the Dutch marijuana users are severely addicted to the marijuana habit? (back this up with factual statistics from reputable research)

In 2015 about 30% of Americans have had an alcohol use disorder and one in 7 or more than 10% are chronic users on a yearly basis and the problem is getting worse. Add chronic alcohol use to habitual chronic marijuana use if legalized nationally and you have over 20% of the population fucked up on two drugs and there are plenty more legal and illegal mind altering drugs to choose from.

Does marijuana unnaturally increase your appetite?

Is pot smoking just as harmful as cigarette smoke in the long duration?


Occasional marijuana usage can tragically lead to excessive usage which can impair job performance, thinking ability, and become a bad role model for personal offspring who will have greater psychological and academic problems in school with heavy usage.

About 10% of pot smokers will become an addicted or habitual burden upon society just as excessive alcohol usage is a great cost to society. There is also the greater probability that marijuana usage will lead to other forms of more addictive drug use in a permissive society causing more social havoc and misery in society.

Drugs of any kind such as opiods, cocaine, marijuana, alcohol, etc. artificially alter the mind’s chemistry and long duration usage is usually detrimental to good brain health or functioning. If you want to lead a productive life and be a success then drug usage will only handicap your ability to achieve wanted goals in life.

Escape from reality with marijuana and alcohol or cocaine usage and reality may come crashing down on you with a failed marriage, failed relationships, and maybe even job failure. There is no proof that average marijuana usage will ruin your life. It just makes the probability that you will have detrimental bad side effects in your life more likely, especially if you become a chronic user.

You should fear rampant personal and social use of marijuana and similar drugs in society because future generations and you personally and your family will probably be adversely affected in the long duration.

Finally, I don’t get high on marijuana and get drunk to feel good or reduce stress. Why should you? I don’t need artificial highs but prefer natural highs to feel good such as exercise and drug free social interaction. Our home is a drug free zone with punishment if caught and you will have to wait till your 18 and you live by yourself to use it freely if you choose to do so.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


Become genuinely interested in humans and keep improving your emotional intelligence with interactive human experience.

First impressions are important so smile when introducing yourself and remember a human’s name which are the first 2 signs of genuine friendly interest.

Be a good listener and only politely interrupt to change the subject if the human is getting too verbose or uninteresting.

Encourage others to talk about themselves and ask relevant follow up questions which show an interest in what they are saying and doing.

Talk in terms of the human’s interests or focus on the human’s loves and likes when interacting.

Make the human feel important by sincerely complimenting when a compliment is deserved and sincerely agreeing with an opinion if it seems to have merit or is plausible.

Share your views on a topic if there is a resemblance but rarely discuss highly controversial topics such as religion, politics, and sports unless you become close friends or are of similar persuasion.

In the long duration humans will like and maybe even admire you if you have integrity or are moral and honest, are trustworthy, are dependable, are competent, are friendly, or generally deserve to be respected.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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One myth is that we use only about 10% of our brain. In fact almost all the brain is active all the time so we use about 100% of the brain, although certain regions of the brain are more active than others for given activities. MRI’s are one way to detect brain activity for different mental activities or different activated regions in the brain.


It is a myth that the left brain is more logical, analytical, intellectual, and the right brain is more intuitive, creative, and artistic. Both sides of the brain participate in analyzing, synthesizing, and intuitively being creative.

While it is true that some humans who do better in mathematics and science with much formal training, they tend to be more logical and analytical and their creativity and intuition is more firmly limited by objective rules and principles that guide their thinking. Both sides of the brain are used to function.

Artists can also analyze and synthesize what they are doing. Their subjective, impulsive creativity and often less formal training has less rigorous limitations. This results in many more mutant forms of creativity which are frankly very random in nature and often show a minimum of focused skill. You could generally say that artists are much freer or wilder in their thinking and doing than mathematicians and scientists but both sides of the brain participate.


It is a myth that there is ESP or extra sensory perception or psychic ability. Despite the fact that there is no scientific evidence to support psychic ability, humans love to think and believe that someone may be able to foresee the future and tell them what is in store for them.

The popularity of horoscopes is one indication of the gullibility of humans who fall for these predictive prognostications. Yes, there is coincidence that what the horoscope talks about or predicts is what generally or actually happens in your life on certain days. However, statistically horoscopes are less than 50% accurate which means that they are worse at predicting the future than a coin toss prediction.

Human hope springs eternal and one or a few lucky coincidences or events is unfortunately what keeps fortunetellers and gambling operations in business. One accurate prediction or a fake staged performance of many accurate predictions in front of a large audience can make many gullible believers in psychic ability.


It is a myth that subliminal messages can affect our behavior. Subliminal means something below the threshold of sensing and/or consciousness so if the message is visual and/or verbal we would not be aware of it realistically.

Yes, you could randomly flash a picture or part of a picture on the screen or flash an audio of a word and/or sound. This would register on our brain and we would be probably annoyed at the random disturbance, not be positively affected by it, and it would no longer be a subliminal message which we are not aware of.


It is a myth that adolescence is a time for emotional outbursts, stress, tension, rebellion, dependency conflicts, peer-group conformity, sexy dress, motorcycles, black leather jackets, and similar deviant behavior. Most adolescents from normal moral families do not have turbulent adolescences and those that do usually come from dysfunctional families.

Sure, even moral families may witness a few rebellious incidents such as clandestine cigarette, drug, or alcohol use, trying to fit in with undesirable popular peers, or inappropriate clothing and accessories. However, the vast majority do not have many such undesirable behavior problems, especially in nonwestern cultures where parenting is more formalized, better disciplined, and less permissive.


It is a myth that polygraphs or lie detectors and truth serums can accurately detect dishonesty or lies. Polygraphs measure parameters such as degree of sweating and heart beat but they are only about 60% accurate in detecting lies which means that about 40% get away with the lie.

Truth serum like alcohol reduces your inhibitions and you are slightly more inclined to tell the truth but the accuracy of truth serum is no better than the polygraph. The government still occasionally uses the polygraph on some of it’s high security workers but it is forbidden evidence in a court of law because it can’t prove anything beyond a reasonable doubt or close to 100% accuracy.


It is a myth that happiness is mostly dependent on our external circumstances. While it is true that there are certain things like possessions, great house, great job, plenty of pleasurable events, and much money which can bring great happiness in the short duration, long duration happiness is mostly dependent on inner drives, ambition, personality traits, attitudes, disposition, motivations, thoughts, and beliefs and not so much on external circumstances.

An external circumstance like divorce and death in the family can lead to some long duration unhappiness but in general we adjust to our own homeostasis or how happy we are over the long haul.

Yes, having some close and great friends are an external circumstance which has the potential to create great happiness but it is often because we ourselves have INNER integrity, are dependable, trustworthy, encouraging, and competent in our lives and attract other humans with similar characteristics.

Other humans, an external circumstance, make volunteering possible but it is ultimately the INNER satisfaction of helping others or a cause which makes the volunteer happy in the long duration.

A lonely household cat can be happy with food, water, sleep, shelter, petting, and a little exercise. Some minimally existing humans also don’t need very much to be happy if they have adequate food, water, sleep, shelter, clothes, alcohol, and occasional contact with other humans.

The truth is that both internal and external factors affect our happiness but the greatest source of long duration happiness is internal factors. Being optimistic, ambitious, driven, grateful, friendly, empathetic, courageous, confident, and being a perpetual thinker and doer trying to achieve short and long duration goals are internal factors which yield the greatest personal happiness under all external circumstances over a lifetime.


It is a myth that humans who are opposite in looks, personality, and beliefs are attracted to each other. It is a popular Hollywood myth which makes for interesting cinema but the reality is that similar looks, personalities, and beliefs result in more lasting relationships with spouses and friends alike. Our ideal mate or friend may be someone whom we ourselves would not attract because we ourselves are not as ideal as we think we are and simply can’t attract and land our ideal mate or friend.

Many of us like to fantasize how great it would be to marry a beautiful or handsome human with a great personality even though we are plain looking with borderline personalities. This is why opposites attract films get much support from the common filmgoer or watcher.

Yes, being too similar in looks, personality, and beliefs may lead to boredom but most humans are different enough to have slightly different likes and dislikes, strengths and weaknesses, which makes an ongoing relationship interesting if both have an ambition to improve themselves in some way or have different goals in life as time progresses.


It is a myth that men and women communicate in completely different ways. Some women are more talkative than men because some are more social than men and have more friends. They also have a tendency to go into minute details about who said what to whom and what were the reactions. Men historically have been doers and not talkers on the job so traditionally women stayed at home and communicated with offspring and friends over the phone. Today both men and women work and lead similar lifestyles so the difference in talkativeness is rather minimal overall but may vary widely for individual couples.

It seems that women and men in positions of power interrupt conversations more often so it is not a characteristic of men only.

Women seem to be more perceptive of nonverbal cues than men or can detect emotional nuances better than men. This is not surprising because women have historically been trained to express their emotions rather than suppress them as is more common with men. Yes, it is acceptable if a woman cries but not a man in most cultures and this is just a reflection of cultural bias and conditioning. A man is supposed to control his emotions and a woman can be more emotional. Women in general and men with emotional intelligence can better pick up emotional cues.

Individuals differ in the degree of the quality and quantity of their personal communication but there are no glaring differences between how men or women communicate in general.


It is a myth that it is better to express anger than to hold it in. While some humans may initially feel better after yelling loudly, punching a bag, or destroying some property the long duration result is that it encourages or enforces future angry or aggressive episodes and prolongs the hatred of the subject or object of the anger.

Disciplining yourself to internally suppress angry feelings when they arise is the best policy. Taking concrete steps to reduce that anger such as counting to ten or delaying a problem for future resolution when the anger has subsided is the right thing to do.


It is a myth that low selfesteem is the major cause of psychological problems. Research has NOT shown a cause effect relationships between low selfesteem and problems such as violence, alcoholism, drug abuse, eating disorders, school dropouts, teenage pregnancy, suicide, and bad academic achievement.

Accepting this myth has resulted in rewarding trophies to losers in sports and falsely telling students that they are smart, great, and wonderful for trying and failing at important tasks. Praising humans when they don’t deserve it or have not earned the praise leads to humans who are deluded into thinking that they are greater than they really are and their sense of selfworth is corrupted or is highly inaccurate.

True confindence or valid selfesteem grows out of successfully achieving more goals than failing at goal achievement. Delusional selfesteem arises when we fail much more often than succeed at doing things and still have a great deal of delusional confidence in ourselves.

The primary source for this article was 50 Great Myths of Popular Psychology by Lilienfeld, Lynn, Ruscio, and Beyerstein.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

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If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


Don’t multitask

Set deadlines for important tasks before they are actually due

Minimize distractions

Ensure mental alertness with healthy food and drink, a good night’s sleep, morning exercise, and rest periods during work

Schedule important tasks during your most productive hours

Remind yourself by looking at a written schedule

Batch your tasks in order of priority

Refuse additional commitments unless it is an emergency

Keep your workspace organized

Manage your stress with breaks during work and after work

Try to divide big tasks into smaller tasks or serial steps

Daily set aside some free time for emergencies and needed research

If permitted, work overtime to meet your daily schedule

Make a time schedule or logbook of your daily activities for two weeks with minute details such as going to the rest room and texting or talking on the cell phone.

Grouping or characterizing the activities is the hard part. For a job schedule you may have categories such as supervisory duties, meetings, appointments, communications via cell phone or computer, routine tasks, infrequent or unexpected tasks, break time, customer time, cleanup time, planning time, waiting time, and even doing nothing time or killing time.

Becoming a more efficient worker is hard because you have to analyze each

category and ask yourself. Should I spend less or more time on the category? How important is the category? Can the category be changed, improved, eliminated, or given to someone else? Can I take on more tasks or categories?

A parenting, managerial, technical, sales, and routine job are very different jobs and managing your time in each job category varies widely.

If you are stuck in a routine boring repetitive job then there is very frequently nothing much that you can do to improve it.

If you have a technical job then your primary means of improvement may be developing more technical skill either through learning or on the job training.

If your job is mostly managerial then you should concentrate on trying to improve on your emotional intelligence or communications skills.

If you are a parent trying to become a better one then sharing your experiences with other parents with children and getting feedback or reading parenting books may be a logical way to improve.

If you are in sales then there is a big difference in selling software or selling cars. For car sales things such as speedy delivery, color, size, extras, and brand popularity are frequently more important than the actual functionality or details of the product. Salesmen have to come across as someone whom the customer can trust and establishing quick rapport or trust is a skill few humans have in abundance. Good sales humans have excellent human skills and can deal with all kinds of personality types rich or poor.

Planning ahead is very important in time management and looking over a schedule the night before or reviewing a schedule of things to do before the job starts is a very useful tool.

If you are forgetful then by all means write down your tasks or assignments and the deadline or when they are due and your approximation of about how long it will take.

Make a To Do List with things which have to be completed and update it daily and make it electronically available to your boss and coworkers so they know your workload and will hopefully not overload it.

Stay organized by clearing your work desk and computer of clutter or useless info. Organize everything so it is readily accessible when you need it.

Try to schedule important meetings or events early in the morning which is usually the time when you are working most efficiently or when you are at your best.

Try to fence humans out during your most productive hours. Do not disturb signs are the old way of doing this but you can block out times on your electronic schedule or be short and dismissive if you are interrupted.

Based on your time on the job you can come up with an approximation of the time it takes for you to handle unexpected delays or small rush tasks or communications. Set aside that extra hour or two for delays and you may not have to work overtime each time unexpected obligations arise during the day.

Cut back on your verbosity with family, coworkers, and even boss and stay on topic or subject and try not to diverge. Try to be as brief as possible and to the point in businesslike fashion.

Write down important information about a phone conversation if you are the forgetful kind and usually briefly talking over the phone is quicker than a memo to that human.

Meetings can be a big time waster if humans are not given the agenda ahead of time or if there is no agenda, if the meeting is not held in the morning but at the end of the day when most do not function efficiently, and if there is not a time limit placed on each agenda topic to encourage speedy resolution.

Protect your time from being hogged by others and simply standing up during an encounter can discourage idle conversation about irrelevant topics. Not having your desk chair face the door, having only one guest chair which needs pulling out, keeping your door shut or partially open can reduce interference times, and simply saying no I’m busy are all ways to discourage chit chat.

Learn to delegate authority if you are the manager.

You can greatly reduce procrastination or even eliminate it if you have a To Do List and actually follow it.

Don’t turn down jobs which seem to be outside your realm of expertise. It may be a test to see if you can do more and you may even get a promotion and pay raise out of it if you succeed and do it well.

If you feel insecure about an assignment because of lack of knowledge or experience then try to get that knowledge from coworkers or other sources before you attempt it.

Use free time during travel time to gain new knowledge, communicate with humans, prepare for the future, or just use the time to rewind or relax.

Take 5 or 10 minute breaks during the day to wind down or do some relaxing to avoid burnout.

At home save time by combining trips out of the house to more than one destination, organize your home, train your family to get accustomed to a normal routine which is relatively predictable, control your offspring access to the internet and TV, and try to live close to work.

Reward yourself with a tasty organic snack, herbal tea, organic fruit and/or vegetable juice, or a break after completing a task successfullyIf it is not convenient then your favorite treat is acceptable.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


The current headlines all center around the question of inappropriate sexual behavior in the business or professional world. You can seriously ask. Were some of the incidents just examples of courtship rituals or was it really an example of sexual abuse in a work environment?

There are many bachelors and single women working together or interacting in the business and professional world. Men being men and women being women it is very hard to control sexual desires and totally eliminate courtship rituals from the workplace. Courtship rituals involve touching, vocalizations, displays of beauty, and fighting prowess or power.

Men in powerful positions and especially those who are handsome may be tempted to show their aggressiveness and prowess by slapping or pinching the butt, affectionately touching the back, shoulder or neck, hugging, saying very complimentary remarks or hinting at sexual behavior prowess, and in general saying and doing things which are acceptable during a courtship but not acceptable between professionally interacting males and females.

The real solution to the problem of sexual abuse in the workplace is to make strict rules forbidding all courtship rituals during working hours. Is this a realistic solution if a male and female are actually in a sexual relationship after work hours and actually courting? In this situation the male and female would have to have incredible emotional and physical control to avoid inappropriate behavior in the workplace.

The questions to ask to resolve a sexual abuse complaint would be. Is the male or female or both married? Do they have a sexual or courtship relationship outside of the workplace? Was the courtship ritual in the workplace intentional or unintentional or a mistake? Is the claim of sexual harassment really a desire for revenge on the part of a jilted female?

A married human should not be courting in the workplace and the only recourse would be to say that the sexual abuse was a mistake or unintentional. Can you prove this in a court of law? Highly unlikely so we really have not successfully resolved the real life issue of inappropriate sexual behavior or demonstrating an inappropriate courtship ritual in the workplace.

There is a very old saying that all is fair in love and war. If the majority of humans feel this way then I am afraid that a just solution to inappropriate sexual behavior in the workplace will be an open wound or sore which will never heal and many men will be unjustly persecuted by the establishment media for political and/or economic gain with sensationalism as a backdrop.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!