Monthly Archives: January 2018


Crying boy being disciplined or punished.

One of the most effective ways of letting kids learn about the wrong things to do is to let them suffer the consequences.

Buy a relatively fragile toy and warn them sternly that it is fragile and it will break if thrown around or dropped from a high height. Then let the child play with the fragile toy until they wind up breaking it. Then tell them that because they were not careful enough the toy broke and tell them that it will be a long time before they will be trusted with another fragile toy again.

Obviously if the child is too young to be trusted with toxic household chemicals, dangerous medicines, or sharp objects like knives and sharp forks then these objects should be locked away in a secure place inaccessible to the child. You would not want them to suffer the bad consequences of being poisoned, cutting themselves severely with a sharp knife, or poking out an eye with a sharp fork.

The swimming pool is very dangerous for very small children and it should be fenced off until the child is taught to tread water or minimally stay afloat.

When crossing a street it is wise to hold the hand of a child and teach them to look both ways before crossing the street. If the child is not old enough to follow you across the street without running out into it then you must continue to hold the child’s hand until the child follows you obediently across the street on their own.


Logical consequences can also be taught with consistency.

If a child begins to throw a toy around which is not meant to be thrown then it can be removed and placed on a shelf for the rest of the day. A toy which is meant to be shared can similarly be removed for a day if sharing does not occur. If the children are old enough to tell time then you can request that each child share a toy for 10 minutes at a time. Once again, if the toy is not appropriately shared then it can be removed for the day. Sometimes a toy can be shared on a daily basis and one child may have it on Monday and the other can have it to play with on a Tuesday, etc.

Before bedtime it is a good time to put toys away. If the child does not put the toys away then you can threaten to put the toys in a box and not make them available for the next day of playing. If the child still refuses to put the toys away then follow through with the threat and box up the toys and remove them to a safe place out of reach for the next day.

Bathing, brushing teeth, and putting dirty clothes into a laundry hamper is a good routine to get into before bedtime. Once again a threat to remove a favorite toy for a day or a few days may be used to get compliance. Not highly recommended but possible is to force a child to put dirty clothes in a hamper by physically making them go through the motions by grabbing the child’s hand and moving his or her body from clothes to hamper until all the dirty clothes have been dropped in.

If a child does not finish dinner then that is just fine but warn them that they will be given no food or snacks until the next meal time. Children these days are overfed and missing one or two meals is not a tragic or unacceptable circumstance. Our ancestors sometimes went days without eating and even fasted at certain times and frankly only ate when hungry.

Another technique used by parents to stuff their kids is to say that you will only get desert if you finish your meal. Frankly, desert should be maybe a once in a week event since overconsumption of sweets is a major cause of diabetes and other eating problems. Supermarkets are overflowing with sugar added to lousy over processed foods of all kinds and is a major reason why many humans no longer eat healthy well balanced organic food meals.

For children fighting scolding in a loud voice can help and if that fails separating them physically and carrying one off to sit in a chair in a corner by themselves for an hour or so is usually effective. If a child throws a tantrum in a public place then physically removing them from that location and getting them to quiet or cool down in the car or outside the public location usually works if reinforced with the words-are you now ready to go back and behave?


Withholding a child’s privileges works well for all ages.

Withholding a cherished toy, not letting a child play outdoors for a day, or not letting him or her play with a playmate are privileges which can be withheld for bad behavior or as a form of discipline. For older children taking away a cellphone or computer for a day or week and grounding them for a given time are ways to get compliance with household rules and good behavior.

Spanking is usually not recommended but there may be certain children who are becoming compulsive liars or stealers and adults can be severely punished for these behaviors. Explain first to the children that lying and stealing destroys the trust between humans and they can no longer be good friends or no one will believe them anymore and that adults are punished for stealing with fines and jail. The threat of spanking should first be done for serious lying or stealing and then a consistent follow through with the spanking punishment if the intentional lying or stealing occurs again.


Discuss the logical consequences or reasons why bad behavior should not be tolerated.

Parents are usually not very good at this.

Reasons against fighting can be physical pain or harm on another, causing aggressive emotions and actions in another or probable bad retaliation, parents don’t physically fight with one another because they love one another and want to live together peacefully, and finally adult fighting is called physical abuse or battery and aggression punishable by jail time.

Reasons against yelling indoors is that it disturbs or annoys others who may not be able to concentrate on what they are doing, it is usually done in emergencies such as an accident, and it is usually done outdoors to cover a larger communication distance and to signal danger such as a speeding car or bicycle, etc.

Reasons for being polite, kind, considerate, empathetic, and friendly is that most humans will like you more and may even become a friend.


Non negotiable arguments for younger children.

There are just times when something isn’t fair in the child’s mind or when the child asserts his or her stubborn self and refuses to do something no matter how reasonable it may be. These are time when the parent has to say “yes, it isn’t fair” or “I know” and proceeds to enforce the rules saying Me and Mom are in charge of the family and rule enforcement and we are the final authority in making decisions for the children in the family. When you have children of your own then you can be the boss over them when they are young.


Finally the most important thing is to be a good role model for your children since most children ultimately behave like their parents later in life and act the same way towards their own children also. If you want your children to not smoke, not drink, not do drugs, not curse, not gamble, not fight, not frequently argue and if you want them to be polite, kind, courteous, empathetic, friendly, and loving then be that way yourself and interact appropriately with your spouse and other humans.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


I no longer have the patience to wallow through verbosity and storytelling to try to make sense of some of life’s principles. However, I would recommend this book to someone who is confused in life and is having trouble making sense out of a seemingly chaotic life. That said I selected 6 of Peterson’s rules with a brief commentary on them.


Rule 3. Make friends with people who want the best for you.

Try to make friends with humans who have integrity, are trustworthy, dependable, competent, friendly, and motivate you to be even better than you are. Beware of humans with good intentions who seem to want the best for you but have their own faulty views of what is best to have in life or have their own axe to grind.


Rule 4. Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today.

This just means continue to improve yourself with research, reading, thinking, and doing on your road to the achievement of short and long duration goals. Comparing yourself to others is fraught with error or danger since very often you, your circumstances, and abilities are very different than those of others and comparisons are often pointless.


Rule 6. Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world.

Your house will never be in perfect order in the long duration so if you lead a relatively happy and orderly life feel free to criticize the world and especially make suggestions on how to improve it but don’t be too dogmatic about your criticism.

A good place to start the critique is with yourself. Can you honestly say? If most humans lived the way that I live my life, then the world would be a better place to live in.

If more humans lived the way that you live your life, perhaps in unhappiness and desperation, then your critique of the world would not be that relevant.


Rule 8. Tell the truth—or, at least, don’t lie

To maintain integrity and trustworthiness, being honest, moral, dependable, and competent is essential, especially if you are interested in maintaining a good reputation in society and hope someday to assume leadership positions. Most relationships crash and burn when dishonesty is detected or it becomes a very dysfunctional relationship with much misery, uncertainty, and lack of security if the relationship stupidly continues without trust.

Trust is the human bond which makes long duration relationships possible and without trust relationships eventually become very unstable, chaotic, and end.


Rule 9. Assume that the person you are listening to might know something you don’t.

This is just a fact of life that even if you think that you know a lot, other humans will occasionally surprise you with useful knowledge that you never realized existed. Be a good listener but remember that it is OK to interrupt to change the subject or even end the conversation if it is boringly focusing on relatively trivial information.

Emotional intelligence is gotten by interacting with all kinds of humans, learning how to converse with them in discussion mode, and learning how to extract important information without sounding like an interrogator.


Rule 10. Be precise in your speech.

Speak efficiently is another way of putting it or be brief and to the point is another. I have spent a lifetime trying to define words logically since being precise is not a virtue of the English language with so many vaguely defined words and a confusing bonanza of multiple meanings, synonyms, antonyms, and dubious analogies.


Rule 1: Stand up straight with your shoulders back.

Rule 2: Treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping.

Rule 5: Do not let your children do anything which makes you dislike them.

Rule 7: Pursue what is meaningful (not what is expedient).

Rule 11: Do not bother children when they are skateboarding.

Rule 12: Pet a cat when you encounter one on the street.

If these other 6 rules of life which I skipped peaked your interest then buy and read his book. It seems he may even have a sense of humor which you might enjoy.

Frankly there is much more to life that is important than these 12 principles but he is a typical psychologist whose mind is not very analytical and logical but bases most of  his views on mostly subjective information which he has read about in his career and personal subjective experiences and values.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


Even those who believe in pure freedom of speech will usually agree that libel and slanderous statements against private individuals should be censored and subject to legal enforcement for violations. No one should be in the business of destroying the good reputation of moral law abiding citizens.

Libelous and slanderous statements or lies against public officials and celebrities are deplorable, especially if they come from the establishment media. Even in public media the anything goes philosophy does not seem appropriate and some censorship is necessary. If the speech is moral then there should be no censorship of it. But who is going to define what moral free speech is and who can be trusted to enforce it?

Censorship by the powerful and monied class is especially corrosive when there is immorality in the leadership of entertainment, business, and political institutions. Powerful celebrities sometimes do practice sexual abuse and sometimes gender exploitation because they think they will get away with the behavior and whistleblowers are often ruthlessly financially destroyed or blacklisted for trying to divulge the corruption.

Criminal and fraudulent behavior and scams, child pornography, incitements to violently overthrow the government, terrorist recruiting, death threats on the internet, exposure of minors to very deviant violent sexual behavior or pornography, and trying to ruin the good reputation of an individual in the media with unproven libelous and slanderous videos are the major areas which definitely need censorship.

The internet and phone lines have been free for so long that criminals and scam artists are rampant and the security of phone lines is in jeopardy with “scam possible” messages on phone lines that don’t seem to go away. It actually is beginning to seem that scam artists are so powerful that freedom from them or exclusion of them from your home is becoming a losing battle.

I am not convinced that “hate” speech should be censored since there are so many things which humans can hate. There are individuals, ethnic groups, nations, criminal or immoral behavior, and illegal substances which some humans hate with a passion. Should this hate speech be censored too, and if so, to what degree? The borderline between “I don’t like a lot” and “I hate” is sometimes very broad and it is almost impossible to discriminate verbally between the two.

Who will censor this? Google, Facebook, Microsoft, Twitter, etc. will have to do this and yes, many may be unjustly censored, especially deviant political ideas and extremes, but the deviant ones should be able to go to other less well known websites and spew their radical views there. When the deviant websites begin to reach a much broader audience then they will have to censor their own websites too or their reputation will remain in the toilet.

Ultimately it is the youth of a nation which needs censorship from criminal, immoral, and deceptive practices. If the internet is going to be the primary source of information and entertainment then the internet will have to be censored as a public utility by someone. China is already censoring the internet to a large extent and I believe it is just a matter of time before the United States also is going to have to begin censoring the internet in a much more aggressive style than at present. Perhaps the real solution is to create an internet for minors with optimal censorship and an internet for adults with minimum censorship.

The only certain thing is that big money will continue to play a dominant role in censorship procedures and will try to make sure that their information will be prominently displayed before the public. Who will counteract the power of big money on the internet? Few to date are fulfilling that important role of monitoring the censorship of big money and making sure that small reputable businesses have a fair playing field on the internet.

I personally bemoan the fact that I can no longer easily get quality pictures and videos to share on my blog website. There are fewer and fewer websites which offer basic trustworthy online picture editing or resizing for free. Yes, plagiarism and theft of intellectual property was rampant in the old internet but the new internet is becoming a world where minority views and efforts are easily suppressed by big money and censoring search engine algorithms.

How much will the internet be censored in the future? It is hard to predict how intense the censorship will be other than the fact that there will be more of it. The little internet user will be more oppressed than ever and it will be almost impossible trying to make some money with videos and written content unless you are a celebrity to begin with.

Criminal and immoral activity on the internet must be minimized and fake news and fake facts should be policed to some extent. Trust in a website means that the website has a good reputation and we should never reach a point where no website on the internet can be trusted anymore, since society will disintegrate into dangerous chaos and instability.

Sexual promiscuity and some drug use rampantly promoted in the entertainment media is devastating the stability of family life and harmonious male female relationships. The credibility of establishment media is being assaulted with some success and they no longer have a sterling reputation. It seems that alternate media is the wave of the future since mainstream media is fast losing its credibility and with it moral trusting consumers.

How the internet will look in ten years is debatable but we can definitely look forward to more censorship and more breaches of security by unscrupulous hackers. In the meantime, try to enjoy the treacherous tumultuous ride!

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


Big money rules the world but the success of a nation is determined by how the money is distributed to promote a useful education and good work ethic for the majority of its citizens.

Not too often discussed is the most important education and that is a moral education which is vital to the peaceful trusting cooperation between citizens and between citizens and their leadership.

Religion has traditionally filled this moral void but in increasingly secular societies young impressionable minds must be indoctrinated with a secular moral code so that they can impulsively make moral decisions without always having to stop and ask when interacting with other humans- Is what I am doing right or wrong?

Realistically, all offspring by the age of about 13 should be able to discriminate between what is morally right and what is morally wrong. In a nutshell that secular moral code should be- in nonemergency situations- don’t destroy biodiversity, don’t lie, don’t be inefficient, don’t steal, don’t commit adultery if married, and don’t murder.

Next in importance is an education which encourages competence in basic skills such as reading, basic math, and budgeting your money or paying attention to the price of products and their relative quality. Price per pound calculations and awareness of food ingredients and all additives is vital to a healthy organic diet and a healthy society in general.

Not often mentioned is the importance of efficiency in everyday life. To maintain an industrious, smart, hard, work ethic, vocational skills should be taught in high school. Real life work experiences should begin at about the age of 14 and definitely by the age of 16 for all those not academically inclined.

In a fast changing technological age your education should really be life long or never cease. Selfeducation is very important and all citizens should be taught how to maintain childhood curiosity and learn and relearn throughout a lifetime to keep pace with rapid societal change. For all those falling through the cracks who become unemployed and also destitute, online free internet useful education should be provided. This is so that there is always the hope of making it back into the workforce with personally devoted time, energy, effort, and ability.

Yes, soon technology, robotization, and artificial intelligence will make many repetitive menial tasks obsolete and it is entirely possible that many citizens will have to be put on permanent welfare. When the permanent welfare class exceeds 30% then it will become desirable to limit their voting power to a fraction of 1 vote or the working class will become slaves working for a luxurious permanent welfare class which doesn’t work but just consumes valuable national resources.

Working for a lifetime for a company will probably not be a viable alternative for the average worker in the future modern world. That is why the opportunity to reeducate oneself throughout a lifetime will become very important and need some monetary educational government assistance.

Government workers seldom get fired but a huge inefficient government bureaucracy is also not an acceptable answer or solution.

A dystopian society is an unhealthy, ignorant, drugged, lazy, criminal, majority on permanent welfare or in jail. If given a choice, I don’t think anyone would really want to live in such a society.

A realistic good functioning society is healthy, educated, moral, drug free, industrious, and employed for a large percentage of a human’s lifespan.  How do you incentivize a society to reward these kinds of humans? I have spent a lifetime trying to answer this question in detail in my writings.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


Respect: v. to sense and frequently communicate that a human has (much value and/or moral goodness) and/or (much skill(s) in a (profession and/or activity)) and/or is experienced and has few severe personality flaws and the human is dependable


Basically we respect moral humans who don’t lie to us or deceive us, don’t steal from us, don’t commit adultery, don’t have severe personality flaws, and are dependable.

A car mechanic may be an expert in his or her field but if they are not moral and cheat us on repairs then we will not respect them and go elsewhere for car repairs.

Some erroneously may idolize wealthy and powerful humans who may not be that moral but have a profound influence in our lives. Powerful leaders and tyrants who are immoral are feared by many and it seems that they are respected also but the respect or more accurately an awareness is an ambivalent “respect” and fear of power and not a respect of the leader’s moral goodness.

We may not approve of or respect the Chinese political system but we are impressed by their economic power and are forced to deal with it. This realization is not true respect for the entire country but a “respect” for their ability to succeed economically in the world even though they are major counterfeiters of brand named products and steal patents and intellectual property with abandon.

We don’t truly respect them but rather fear their economic system and its power to put established companies and workers out of business.

The United States is also no longer being as respected worldwide because they have lost their moral rudder and with it respect. American international companies bribe national governments to get favorable treatment and American international banks are stealing taxpayer’s money and creating huge deficits which will probably never be paid off by future generations.

Big business through special interest legislation is killing off the potential success of small new businesses and decimating the middle class. The middle class is also being killed off by the technological revolution which is robotizing, using the internet, standardizing parts, and effectively killing many jobs with superior computer software.

The big inefficient American economy and government is also morally unjust and is not as respected as it once was.

The American secular class has also lost its respect and moral rudder to guide it and the result is failed marriages, poor social relationships, and a hedonistic approach to life. Too many Americans are lying, deceiving, and committing adultery. Family life and many human relationships are disintegrating.

With an emphasis on making money for money’s sake without a moral rudder, mental and physical health is deteriorating because of unhealthy lifestyles, unhealthy food, and the over use of artificial drugs by the medical and psychiatric professions.

Unhealthy, immoral citizens, and unjust political laws are bankrupting the medical and social welfare system and adding to the national debt.

Morality and respect begins by teaching young impressionable minds what is moral behavior and it eventually is reflected in the kind of human leadership that we get in powerful organizations. Without this impulsive morality practiced by most citizens the result is chaos and eventual tyranny or dictatorship which governs by the threat of force and the use of force and not rule by the voluntary trusting cooperation of its citizens.

The new secular worldwide MORAL CODE which should be practiced to bring back true respect in the world is- in nonemergency situations -don’t destroy biodiversity, don’t lie, don’t be inefficient, don’t steal, don’t commit adultery if married, and don’t murder!!!!!!

One way to be respected is to be good at your profession or job. Many doctors, lawyers, and car mechanics are good at their professions and are respected for their expertise. The reason that some in the professions are not respected is that they behave immorally, lie, deceive, steal, and are incompetent. The more immorality is permitted within a profession, the more disrespected the profession becomes.

If you can trust someone and they are dependable then chances are that you can also respect them because lying or being undependable can frequently ruin trust and with it respect.

If someone is immoral or lies, steals, or is adulterous then they will lose respect.

If you are deceitful which is hidden lying then you will also lose respect once your deceit is uncovered or revealed.

If you break or don’t fulfill many promises then you will not be respected because it is a form of lying about the future and being undependable.

If you are not sincere or nice but hurt human feelings too frequently by being rude, inconsiderate, using ridicule, insulting, name calling, using put downs, humiliating, being quarrelsome, and cruel then you will definitely lose some respect. These are personality flaws which show a disrespect of others. This verbal aggression just like physical aggression seldom has beneficial results.

If you are unjustly critical, a backstabber, spiteful, a name caller, don’t give credit where credit is due, greedy, very lazy, a racist, promiscuous, boastful, vain, or have other severe personality flaws which many humans don’t like then respect for you will decrease though maybe not always to zero.

If you are a tyrannical boss then you will be feared but not respected by most humans.


If you are honest, sincere, dependable, competent, and friendly without severe personality flaws then you will be respected and even admired by most humans. In many cases respect is not automatic but it must be earned with a history of respectful behavior. A history of respectful behavior is really a good reputation and a good reputation is something every moral citizen should aspire to or work towards.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


cognitive bias is often an impulsive mistake in reasoning, evaluating, remembering, decision-making, or other thinking process, often occurring as a result of holding onto one’s preferences, beliefs, emotions, and prejudices regardless of contrary information.

Cognitive biases are impulsive thinking biases which often make you reach the wrong conclusions and lead you into making inaccurate statements. Reality is altered by these cognitive biases and your thinking and decision making process becomes less than perfect often creating mistakes or problems where there shouldn’t be any. Often impulsive emotions are a major reason why the cognitive biases exist in the first place. Emotional impulsive reactions are habitual ways of thinking which dominate the decision making process for most humans and do not require much if any thinking before reacting. Most humans don’t reason or think but are impulsively judgmental to a large degree.

Authority and Respect Bias:

Worth mentioning is that humans tend to be persuaded by or have a greater belief or trust in authority figures and humans that they like, admire, or respect.

Confirmation Bias:

We love to agree with people who agree with us. That is why we only visit websites and read articles that express our political opinions, and why we mostly interact with humans who hold similar views and tastes. We tend to avoid or ignore individuals, groups, and news sources that make us feel uncomfortable or insecure about our views and preferences.

Ingroup or Herd Instinct Bias:

Somewhat similar to the confirmation bias is the ingroup bias, an indication of our innate tribalistic or herd instinct tendencies. This innate impulsive bias helps us to make tighter bonds with people in our own group but performs the exact opposite function for those on the outside. It makes us suspicious, fearful, and even disrespectful and contemptuous of others. The ingroup bias causes us to overestimate the abilities and value of our own immediate group at the expense of people we don’t really know.

Bandwagon Bias:

This is really a takeoff of the ingroup bias which is a tendency for humans to want to go along with the majority in terms of opinions and behavior rather than be the exception to the rule and develop your own opinions and behavior. Humans in general tend to be conformists rather than rebellious non conformists.

Previous Event Bias:

Humans have a tendency to place greater importance on previous events and assume that if something occurred in the past then the chances for repetition of that event in the future are more likely. Thus gamblers erroneously believe that they are on a winning streak despite the fact that the odds against winning are always the same.

Status Quo Bias:

This is our tendency to continue old habits and not try to change to new and perhaps better ones. We have a tendency to order the same types of meals in restaurants and experiment rarely with new choices. We smoke the same brand of cigarettes despite just as good and cheaper ones and stick with brands that we know in general and don’t go for generic equivalents which are just as good. The general summarized attitude is “If it isn’t broken, then don’t fix it.”

Impulse Bias:

We have a tendency to buy what we want in the short run but sometimes buy what we need in the long duration. We prefer to buy donuts and chocolate now but buy healthier foods for the next week’s consumption. Immediate gratification often wins out over delayed gratification and studies have found that those who can delay gratification do better in life and are more responsible.

Inaccurate Generalizations Bias:

This happens when you take just one example and make it into a general rule. Rarely is this attempt at generalization accurate and it is often faulty too. We may hear of one or two women involved in a car accident and make the erroneous generalization that women are worse drivers than men.

Stereotype Bias:

You make decisions biased by ethnic, gender, appearance, or professional stereotypes. You may be asked if both are qualified who would you hire as a car mechanic or nurse, a male or a female? The stereotype of male mechanics and female nurses is hard to overcome and is reflected in hiring practices which theoretically should not be discriminatory. The problem with stereotyping is that generalized group characteristics are unjustly forced on individuals who may greatly deviate from stereotyped group norms and deserve just evaluation.

Always or Never Thinking Bias:

You are too absolute in your thinking and think too many things are yes or no, all or nothing, black or white, always or never, and seldom sometimes, frequently, infrequently or grey. You may believe that the sun never shines during a rain which is generally true in northern areas. However, in Florida, in the summertime there are often 5 or 10 minute showers with the sun shining through the clouds.

Blaming Bias:

Before you uncover the reason for a mistake or a new problem you quickly blame others or yourself for it. There are many cases where circumstances are to blame and no one particular human.

Denial Bias:

Before you uncover the reason for a mistake or new problem you quickly deny that it was your fault or sometimes even deny that it was someone else’s fault. If you trust or like someone a lot then your first reaction may be that they are not to blame for a mistake or problem.

Rule Fanaticism Bias:

You strongly believe that rules are absolute and should be followed unquestioningly all the time. You harshly criticize yourself and others for not following them even though realistically there are exceptions to these rules which should seriously be considered. There are one or more circumstances under which  the rules can be broken but you refuse to accept this reality.

Negative or Positive bias:

You focus too much on either the negative or positive factors and fail to analyze both the negative and the positive events and possibilities. Viewing the local news with all the examples of crime may lead you to pessimistically conclude that crime is getting much worse and you may take extra steps to guard against burglars and other thieves. Negative examples have about 3 times the emotional impact on you than neutral or positive events but there are still many optimists who focus on the positive rather than the negative and feel that things are getting better or at least staying the same.

Pessimistic Fear Bias:

You fear that mostly bad things will happen and often fear the worst case scenario. Being pessimistic about the way things are going in the world is common but it can become a major handicap in your own life if you live in fear of very bad things happening to you and worry about this on a daily basis.

Personalization Bias:

You take things too personally and get easily offended and feel that what humans do and say is a direct reaction to your behavior.

Mind Reading Bias:

You assume that you know what others are thinking without verifying the thoughts with questioning. You may falsely assume that someone is sad rather than tired and greedy about money rather than merely selfinterested and desiring affirmation from others.

Emotional Bias:

You assume that your emotions have validity and that others probably feel the same way that you do. Nowhere is emotional bias more prevalent than in discussions or arguments about religion, politics, and sports.

Fairness Bias:

You think that your idea of fairness is workable and preferable because fundamentally it is your opinion.

Miraculous Thinking Bias:

You think that getting lucky, getting smarter, getting wealthier, finding a mentor, etc. will solve all your problems instantly.

There are more cognitive biases than just 20. If you want more information on cognitive biases done in a slightly different manner then view this link which presents 25 and 12 cognitive biases on YouTube.



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2ae2a8ffbd84e8970a651e4539c410e403.12.2014. - 16a00d8341ed39853ef01a511cbf04b970c-320wi7abf2e64-6c4b-41c7-b433-a5b4e4c7904111.181314 - 1 (1)14 - 1 (1)14 - 1 (2)14 - 1 (3)14 - 1 (4)14 - 1 (5)14 - 1 (6)14 - 1 (7)14 - 1 (8)14 - 1 (9)14 - 1 (11)14 - 1 (12)14 - 1 (13)14 - 1 (16)14 - 11519 12 2014 - 124.09.2014 - 454655d187d-d9d1-4c20-b7dc-9024b46be6642014 - 1 (1)2014 - 1 (2)2014 - 1 (3)2014 - 1 (4)2014 - 1 (5)2014 - 1 (6)2014 - 1 (7)2014 - 1 (11)2014 - 1 (14)2014 - 1 (15)2014 - 12014 - 13731a557-e8b6-4594-9050-d0ed8ed6a8456785-success-without-integrity-is-failure8264b9ec-781b-4cd8-b0ff-e797342b03c59061_n58209e8017260155ff5c3f42fdcaf6ae127002-Wise quotes about life lifewis1378384_787338748009132_3060611427333463859_n1509645_10151945873816378_732272851_n1907916_912535145431165_3604315757598201065_n1908477_787689434640730_1147261687469231548_n10150583_10152351989647952_1975129772_n10277429_10201626728821843_5952272537254952453_n10436347_10205336986773821_9191133024936478198_n10610567_10152410643696693_3273402968631558976_n10624784_379492822198165_4471516482024819730_n10730144_309159915957467_3582184865742151444_nAnything newbad_relationship_quotes~2Best Friend - 1Comparecool-John-Lenon-friendship-quotegustav_00000IMG_0333It is not worth itlife-sayings-quotes-living-motivational-bestMc4UiScreenshot_2014-10-18-08-48-31Screenshot_2014-10-18-09-58-49Screenshot_2014-10-20-21-28-55~2Screenshot_2014-11-14-03-45-33~2Screenshot_2014-12-12-02-33-08~2Screenshot_2014-12-13-03-45-15~2Screenshot_2014-12-18-16-27-02-1Screenshot_2014-12-19-01-38-36~2some peoplesometimes-giving-a-secondspeakingtruthUjjval singhxzJnYbB

Words of wisdom are best with concrete examples or explanations. I have left it up to you to provide those examples from your own personal lives or experiences!!! 

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You can network with humans worldwide

You can intimately communicate with close friends and family

You can network with professionals on Linkedin

You can share hobbies and good internet websites

You can minimize TV watching


The information can be overwhelming

It is hard to exclude false content

Not good for group discussions

It can become an addictive timewaster

You can become a victim of bullying, sexual abuse, and profanity

You can become a victim of insults, put downs, name calling, ridicule, and humiliation

Personal fitness and family time together may suffer

Privacy issues

You can easily fall prey to quantity not quality communications

You can become a victim of too many ads


Social media is a potentially powerful tool which if used judiciously can make and maintain good social contacts and reveal some useful information. Used poorly the addictive tool can become a time waster and take valuable time away from other daily useful pursuits. If you judiciously prioritize the humans that you interact with and schedule your time well then social media can be a great asset in your life.


Networking with humans worldwide is a great advantage if you travel much or want to maintain professional contacts worldwide in your field of expertise. Cheap communications over the internet are very alluring and you don’t have to pay high rates for international communication.

You can easily and cheaply keep in touch with close friends and family members nationally by choosing either Facebook or Instagram. You can use one website exclusively for casual contacts and many “friends” which you only view once in a while. Use another website where you more frequently stay in touch with close friends and family. Separating your close contacts with more remote ones is a good idea so you don’t mix important contacts with rather unimportant ones.

Linkedin is an important website for networking with professional contacts and then you can switch to personal emails if you want the communications to be more intimate or private.

You can network with humans who have similar hobbies or pastimes and share your passion. Getting hints from others about good websites for your important interests can supplement your initial Google or search engine results.

Social media and the internet in general will probably minimize your need to watch TV. You won’t be wasting your time on rather trivial pursuits if you so desire.


Social media can become overwhelming, especially if you are young, get addicted, and are not very selective in the humans that you interact with. Keeping track of a hundred or more friends or acquaintances can be mind boggling. Intensively communicating with a handful of friends can consume an incredible amount of time and be overwhelming. Too much social media can adversely affect your schoolwork, job performance, and offline human communications ability.

If you are heavily involved in politics a recent phenomenon is fake news and it is increasingly becoming harder and harder to tell whether a news report is reliable or possibly misinformation and false. If it is not a reputable source then there is always the possibility of unreliable or false information. A lie like a rumor can quickly spread through social media before you realize what the real truth is. The internet in general is increasingly being plagued with fraudulent activity in the form of scam websites, scams, and bad information in general.

Social media is also not very useful for group discussions so special software may have to be installed to get a group to communicate with each other simultaneously.

Social media can become addictive just like texting so become concerned and start cutting back if you are spending more than two hours daily communicating with others.

Especially young children can become victims of bullying, sexual abuse, and profanity. Further they may be insulted, put down, name called, ridiculed, and humiliated on social media by others. If you become a victim of abuse on social media then it can have some devastating psychological impacts on your mind and behavior. If you are not a fully developed personality incapable of turning off personal assaults then you may become depressed, miserable, or constantly involved in dysfunctional communications.

Too much social media can have negative impacts on your physical fitness and take away from valuable time spent with family. Becoming physically unfit and becoming unable to successfully communicate with family members is something which should be avoided at all costs.

Privacy issues are important because anything on social media is essentially a public communication. Potential employers may view your social media presence and make decisions about hiring based on what kind of friends you have and how much unfavorable information you may have revealed to the world about yourself. A social media presence which shows that you use profanity frequently, are promiscuous, and have friends with bad behavior or criminal records will doom you for any future employment. A delinquent childhood may doom a successful career as an adult in the working world.

The major drawback to social media is that you often can’t discriminate between quality vs. quantity interactions. You may quantitatively communicate much but the quality of your communications may be very bad or mostly trivial useless communications. Essentially you may be wasting your time, energy, and even money on social media and not bettering your life in any significant way.

Most social media is interested in making some money off of you. This often means that you will be deluged with ads for information, goods, and services which may make you buy things which you really don’t need and not only waste your time but also your money too.


Social media is a tool which when used efficiently can help you to maintain contact with important humans in your life and become the source for interesting information and communication. Used inefficiently, social media can become a waster of your time, energy, and eventually money. So learn to use social media wisely and avoid all the pitfalls or cons which are a great temptation and can lead to addictive misery and failure in life.

Social media is a useful technological tool. Use it wisely by prioritizing your contacts, time and energy spent and you will greatly benefit. Use it unwisely and it can become quicksand which will slowly drown you in a sea of overwhelming addictive mostly trivial information.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


Before offering advice on communicating with potential dates on the internet or with texting it is important to state why so much of the communication is unsuccessful.


One major reason that successful communication is so difficult is that there are many males and some females who are deceptive and lie over the internet posing as someone who they really are not. They basically are afraid to reveal who they truly are because they fear that they won’t be physically attractive enough or financially well off enough. They may try to post fake pictures and claim to hold down great jobs when in reality they are average looking and unemployed or working at minimum wage. So try not to be gullible and maintain a healthy suspicion if he sounds too good to be true.


The second reason that successful internet communication is so difficult is that most of the males and also females are really not ready for serious dating. The primary reasons may be because of no job or poor income and any real attempts at dating usually result in very disappointing colossal failures because serious dating usually consumes much time, energy, and money.


Your whole purpose for texting or communicating with men should be to eventually find out if they are going to be a good marital or business partner. You may be a modern promiscuous female just having fun and falsely assuming that what all men really want is immediate sexual intimacy. You may honestly feel that sex should be given to any male that interests you greatly and you will find many playboy males who want to show you a good time but no eventual commitment.


Texting or meeting a new human face to face for the first time is basically the same approach. You want to quickly find out if the man is going to be a good potential friend or mate without being too flirtatious or beating around the bush. If the man is just texting or searching for naïve females to take advantage of them sexually then it is better to find out the truth as soon as possible rather than beat around the bush with vague and emotionally fulfilling communications.


You ideally want a male who has integrity, is trustworthy, is dependable, is competent, and a good communicator. He should be someone who is not afraid to answer tough and eventually somewhat personal questions so don’t be afraid to ask tough questions and eventually some rather personal questions. You want men with the courage to confront almost any question that you may ask. If you feel that you may have offended him with some comment then quickly apologize and move on in the relationship as long as it lasts.


If you are an average looking female without a college education hoping to land a successful college educated male with a good career or job then you are usually wasting your time. If you are a college educated woman with a good career or job then beware of males without adequate education who have no job or very poor ones, especially if they are very handsome. The old saying is still basically true that “birds of a feather flock together” so try to stay away from males outside your comfort and educational zone unless you are extremely attractive and sexy.


In effect don’t aim too high and don’t aim too low in desperate fashion because the probability of making the right long duration connection with a male is rather low or remote over the internet or in person.


Here are some suggested questions to ask:


What do you do for a living?

This question may frighten away many males who have no job or poor ones and that is precisely the reason for the question because you don’t want to waste your time and energy on a financially poor male. If the male has a good job then he will be very willing to tell you about it and maybe brag a little. Talking about his job is a good way to boost his ego with further follow up questions about the job.

Have you always done x for a living?

This is a good follow up question to the first one because you can maybe catch a male in a lie about his job or profession if his prior jobs do not fit his current job status plausibly.

Are you a local?

Long distance relationships fail quite frequently so unless you have the money to travel stay with potential local relationships and stay away from long distance ones.

Long distance relationships are like exciting honeymoons every time you briefly meet physically and are very deceptive indicators of lasting happiness. If you or the male move and live together for a year you may decide that the relationship was never meant to be a lasting one.

What do you do in your free time?

This question will reveal whether the male is just vegetating or doing some interesting things to fill his free time such as trying to improve himself or mostly spending his money on rather trivial pursuits.

Do you have any hobbies?

A good mate is one who usually has a life outside of work so hobbies are one way of determining where his interests also lie outside of work.

How long have you had that hobby?

Some men will brag and maybe deceive females into thinking that they have expensive and interesting hobbies so this is a way to find out if he is deceiving you or has had the hobby for a relatively long time.

Do you have any children?

This question and theme will eventually find out if he is recently divorced or maybe is still married.


After these few initial questions you can end the first or initial interaction until the next time when you can continue to probe deeper with more personal questions.


Do you like your job?

If he doesn’t like his job then you can ask a follow up question and ask if he is going to do anything about a lousy job. You can find out if he has bigger plans or will be stuck in a miserable job on into the near foreseeable future.

How long have you lived here?

You will find out if he is a native local or someone relocating due to job or other reasons.

Do you have many friends?

You can find out if he is somewhat of an extrovert or maybe an introvert with few friends and maybe only one close friend.

What are your future plans?

This will reveal whether the male has some ambition or has too much unrealistic ambition and is vainly hoping to become a celebrity star in some field.

What interesting places have you travelled to?

You can find out if his interests are local or international in scope. A follow up question would be -Where would you like to travel to if you had the opportunity?

What is your favorite food or drink?

Eating is a universal pleasurable pastime and you can find out whether he cooks himself, is a junk food addict, one eating much organic food, or a food gourmet going to restaurants.

Are you on Facebook or Instagram?

You can determine how deeply into social media he is with follow up questions.

After determining whether they are a potential future friend or mate ask for personal information such as an email or telephone number and use phrases such as- It was great talking to you. It would be nice if we kept in touch. What is your email or cellphone number?

Finally, before an actual first date it is important to call the man and speak to him over the phone verbally. You will usually find out pretty quickly if he is the same man on the phone as he is on the internet. Voice fluctuations and his ability to think on his feet instantaneously will become apparent with a phone call and you can often sense if the right vibes are there for actual first date attempts.



The next questions and some direct quotes with some variations are based on Matthew Hussey’s article “9 Magic Texts No Man Can Resist”. Frankly you should be suspicious of any article with the term Magic in it and celebrity Hussey is guilty of misleading a mass audience of women in this instance.


When he asks you what you’re up to?


If you are doing something interesting or have plans to do something which doesn’t sound boring then tell him honestly what you are up to. If you are up to nothing then you can say “I’m taking a shower and will head out later.” If he follows up with “where are you going to head out?” then you had better be prepared to tell him where or he will suspect that you are lying. That is why it is important to be as truthful as possible and not be lying or deceptive in your answers.

If you don’t think that you are a very interesting human doing interesting things then stay single and start on a course of self improvement before you seriously try to make internet connections with males.


“Just bought this. What do you think?”


Men are visual creatures and will respond to a picture of you which is attractive but not overly sexy. He will probably compliment you in some way and it is an opportunity to find out if it is a sincere compliment or an exaggerated and insincere one.


“You should be here right now.”


This suggests that you would want him to be where you are because seemingly something interesting or exciting is going on. Once again he could ask why? Then you will be in a bind if you are not doing anything interesting or exciting. Once again vague statements can be intriguing and good sources for follow up communication but you should be ready to explain or state WHY or you will come across as a deceptive fraud if you aren’t doing anything interesting or exciting.


“I just had an incredible burger! Almost sexual.”


Men like food so a tasty food discovery is always an exciting event. However, be careful about inserting sexual in your phrase unless you may want to get personally sexually intimate in the near future. These days women are more promiscuous than in earlier times but I would reserve sexual intimacy for men who are potentially good marriage partners and you have known them long enough to feel that they are potential good marital partners.


“This jacket would look attractive on you.”


You could use the same sentence with “look HOT on you” but that has sexual connotations and should be used only if you think he considers you more as a friend than a romantic relationship. Using the word hot can be considered sexual baiting if you don’t intend to get sexual with him any time soon.


“As hot as you are, I don’t move that fast.” “But I would be happy to see your handsome face if you want to take me on a date this or next week.”

“Let’s start out as friends and consider sexual intimacy when and if we become close friends.” “ But I would be happy to see your handsome face if you want to take me on a date this or next week.” (This is an honest smart response designed for a smart male.”

This is a good way to turn away a premature sexual advance yet convey your opinion that he is sexually attractive but you are not ready to get sexually intimate. Whether you believe it or not men who are interested in a future wife don’t want one that is sexually promiscuous or one who is overly free with her sexual intimacy. If you develop a reputation as a woman who sleeps around a lot then you will attract many noncommittal males.


“I am not sure we can be friends anymore”


This can either mean that you are breaking up the friendship or you want the relationship to develop past the friendship phase. You may be asked WHY so make sure that you have a truthful answer which makes sense. “I want our relationship to become more exclusive because my feelings for you are becoming rather intense.” or “I want a more exclusive relationship with you.”  or “I think I may be falling in love with you.”


Being honest and expecting honesty should be the guiding principle in any male female interaction. If the male is caught in an intentional lie or is being intentionally deceptive about something important then drop him like a hot potato. Trust is the bond which makes for lasting relationships. Start lying and trust breaks down and there is no good relationship.

Make sure first that you are a woman a man needs and make sure the man is someone you need beyond just a mere sugar daddy or a man financially well off.

You want a male who appreciates you for who you are and who you are hoping to become. Stay single until you are genuinely a good catch for a male that fits your idea of a good father who will be a parent to your future offspring. Ideally he should be a motivating or encouraging, confident, interesting personality who will grow with you in a relationship and in life skills and not become a repetitive uninteresting bore stagnating in life.

STAY SINGLE until you have much more to offer in a relationship than just your vagina! If you want someone with integrity or morality and honesty, trustworthiness, dependability, competence, and with a good job then be someone with integrity, trustworthiness, dependability, competence, and a good job. Yes, many men ideally prefer beautiful, sexy, females but few can realistically afford them because they are usually high maintenance.

Promiscuity is a great enemy to lasting marital relationships. Promiscuity is a bad addictive habit. Adultery is almost inevitable in formerly promiscuous males and females. My opinions on dating may seem conservative and traditional in many ways but they are tried and true techniques which seldom fail in real life in the long duration. Give in to the promiscuity temptation and you are very likely to join the vast number of eventual failed marriages in the modern world if you get that far.

Due to economic uncertainty and a premium on technological jobs, if you are the average liberal arts major then plan for a rather poor single existence for a relatively long duration. Many are choosing to continue living with their parents if permitted after graduation and becoming financially independent and living on your own is becoming increasingly difficult.

Female biological clocks are always ticking but rushing into a marriage in desperation is often a formula for failure and much sustained misery in life.

As long as you are slowly trying to improve yourself in an enthusiastic, determined way then the odds for landing a good future male also increase. Above everything else, never stop trying to get better because a better man should eventually pop up in your life and decide to stay.

My sister in law had quite a few failed relationships in her life until she met her  husband at the age of 50. Yes, she will never have offspring of her own but she is finally married and it seems happily married for the time being. Those prior men frankly primarily used her for sex and never intended to make a long duration commitment.

Some women may feel that being used sexually is better than being ignored but that is not a recipe for long duration happiness for most females.

No one is the final authority on dating in the modern world including myself. Humans vary widely in looks, abilities, and circumstances. Use your own further research to find dating pointers from other sources which maybe fit your own view of male female relationships better. Some relationships can be quite playful with their share of bullshit so adjust your dating to some males who are a little on the risky side if you want some unpredictability and excitement in a relationship.

There is another saying that “Nothing ventured, nothing gained.” It basically means that you should take calculated risks occasionally or you will not gain anything or gain useful knowledge, experience, and achievement. Take a chance and you might succeed or at least learn from the failure and get more emotional intelligence about human males and humans in general.

I offer the following link for all those who have not analyzed themselves or have not taken the time to know themselves. You will find out that it greatly helps to know yourself before you try to improve yourself which is what life should be all about if you want to be happy in the long duration.

If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!


If you liked this evergreen truth blog then read more of them, about 4300 so far, or read one or more of my evergreen truth books, especially EVERGREEN TRUTH, rays of truth in a human world filled with myths and deceptions.

For a complete readily accessible list of blogs and titles go to


If you enjoyed this blog then here is a list of my most popular ones which you may also enjoy!!!